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Ten sex talks to girls 



rving David Steinhardt 



LIBRARY OF THE 
UNIVERSITY OF VIRGINIA 



BEQUEATHED BY 
LAWRENCE T. ROYSTER, M. D. 



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THIS LITTLE BOOK IS DEDICATED BY THE AUTHOR 

To 

OUR GRANDMOTHERS, OUR MOTHERS, OUR WIVES, 
OUR SISTERS, AND OUR DAUGHTERS, IN THE HOPE 
THAT ALL OF THEM WILL FIND BOTH PROFIT AND 
PLEASURE IN THE KNOWLEDGE ITS PAGES IMPART 



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TEN SEX TALKS 
TO GIRLS 

(14 years and older) 



BY 

IRVING DAVID STEINHARDT, M.D. 

AUTHOR OF " TEN SEX TALKS TO BOYS " (14 YEARS AND OLDER) 
INSTRUCTOR IN CLINICAL SURGERY AND ASSISTANT SURGEON, CORNELL UNI- 
VERSITY MEDICAL school; ASSISTANT PEDIATRIST, MOUNT SINAI HOSPITAL, 
O.P.D.. NEW YORK CITY; ORTHOPEDIC SURGEON. NEW YORK HOSPITAL. 
O.P.D.. AND BRONX HOSPITAL AND DISPENSARY; FIRST LIEUTEN- 
ANT. MEDICAL RESERVE CORPS. U.S. A.; BCEMBER OF AMERICAN 
MEDICAL ASSOCIATION; THE AMERICAN SOCIETY OF MORAL 
AND SANITARY PROPHYLAXIS; AND THE AMERICAN 
ACADEMY OF POLITICAL AND SOCIAL SCIENCE. 



WITH SIX ILLUSTRATIONS 



PHILADELPHIA & LONDON 
J. B. LIPPINCOtT. COMPANY 

7 



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COFTRIGBT, I914 
BY J. B. LIPPINCOTT COICPANT 



PUBLISHED FBBKUAKT, I9I4 



EUctrotyped and Printed by J, B» Lippincott Company 
The Washington Square Preu^ Philadelphia^ U» S, A, 



Mi. 



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PREFACE 

The originals of these lectures or talks to girls 
were delivered at the Hebrew Educational So- 
ciety of Brooklyn, before the Florence Memorial 
Aid Society, the "Evergreens," the Emanu-El 
Brotherhood, the Bronx Hospital Assembly, and 
elsewhere. The fact that whenever the author de- 
livered them the assembly rooms proved too small 
to accommodate the would-be audiences shows the 
need for simple instructive talks on sex. Hoping 
that others would help in this work, the author 
offered the lectures for publication to the New York 
Medical Journal. This journal accepted and pub- 
lished them, and the author was subsequently ad- 
vised by its business manager that the demand for 
the numbers of the journal in which the talks 
appeared by far exceeded the supply. The author 
was himself amazed at the large number of re- 
quests he received for copies of the series, and the 
expressed hopes that he would issue the lectures in 
book form for the education of the female public in 
general, and in response to these expressions of 
approval he respectfully offers this little volume of 
the original lectures, revised and somewhat enlarged. 
To others interested in this subject, he offers the 

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4 PREFACE 

use of all or any part of them for lectures or instruc- 
tion. To my audiences I gave the privilege of ask- 
ing questions. To my readers I extend the same 
courtesy, but request that postage be forwarded for 
replies. 

I wish to extend my thanks to Mr. Charles S. 
Bemheimer, of the Hebrew Educational Institute 
of Brooklyn, N. Y., to Mrs. Sarah L. S. Spector, 
of the Florence Memorial Aid Society of this In- 
stitute, to Mr. and Mrs. Tobias Roth, of the Emanu- 
El Brotherhood of New York City, to Miss Molly 
Cohen, of the " Evergreens," and to my numerous 
correspondents who encouraged me in, and were 
kind enough to praise, my little series of talks to 
girls. I also wish to thank those who assisted me 
in the preparation of the manuscript, but who are 
too modest to allow me to mention them by name. 
It is the hope of the author that this little book will 
do something toward saving our girls, little and 
big, from wrong-doing and disgrace, and make of 
them better daughters, wives, and mothers. 
" Forewarned is forearmed." 

Irving David Steinhardt, M.D., 
310 West 99th Street, 

New York City. 
November, 1913. 



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INTRODUCTION 

In heartily recommending this book to young 
people for its sincerity, simplicity, directness, as well 
as its scientific accuracy, I take the opportunity af- 
forded me by the publishers to present a short state- 
ment of my reasons why girls should be deeply in- 
terested in these talks on sex hygiene. No one who 
stops to think will fail to see that it is radically 
wrong to remain ignorant on matters that concern 
us vitally and involve our physical and moral de- 
velojMiient. The idea that ignorance is essential to 
innocence is happily being exploded, and we phy- 
sicians are in a better position than the laity to speak 
of the wreckage and disaster that result from igno- 
rance and neglect of proper instruction on sex 
hygiene. The human machine is a very wonderful 
and complex kind of mechanism, and, as we know, 
the more complicated and delicate a mechanism is, 
the more easily it gets out of order. The disturb- 
ance of any part of it might prove disastrous to the 
entire mechanism. The life of this most complex 
human machine depends on the proper adjustment 
of the parts of our body to one another as well as to 
the outside world (which is our environment). Man 
is superior to all other creatures because of his 

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6 INTRODUCTION 

superior intelligence, which he uses constantly to 
change and modify the outside world so as to make 
adjustment easier and more sure. The same effort 
of human intelligence ought to be applied to the 
internal adjustment of our organs to their functions 
and needs. This automatic internal adjustment 
goes on from the day of our birth to that of our 
death. However, the most strenuous period of our 
adjustment is the period that we call adolescence 
(special growth), during the ages of twelve to 
eighteen or twenty. During this period every organ 
practically is competing for its fullest development 
During this period we are particularly sensitive and 
susceptible to impressions good or bad. During this 
period we form good or bad habits. During this 
period the sex instinct begins to assert itself con- 
sciously. Therefore it is in this period of all in life 
that understanding and guidance are most necessary. 
And in no direction are intelligent guidance and 
understanding more essential than with reference to 
the preparation for the normal and wholesome dis- 
charge of our bodily functions, particularly the func- 
tion of parenthood. The teaching of anatomy and 
physiology in school and at home has been sadly 
neglected in the past, while any teaching upon mat- 
ters of reproduction and sex hygiene has been 
frowned on in the name of modesty and morality. 
But we are beginning to see at last that it is an 



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INTRODUCTION 7 

insult to commonsense and to real morality to assume 
that there is anything shameful or indecent in learn- 
ing to understand our instincts and the functions of 
our bodies. The immodesty and immorality lie in 
the old-fashioned attitude toward it. The study of 
physiology and hygiene of sex is bound to have the 
same effect on character that the study of natural 
science, psychology, and philosophy have, namely, 
to deepen our reverence for the wonderful processes 
of nature and to intensify our desire to make the best 
of our faculties and carefully fit ourselves for our 
noblest part in life. 

Rachelle S. Yarros, M.D., 

Chairman of Social Hygiene of General 

Federation of Women's Clubs. 



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TEN SEX TALKS TO 
GIRLS 



In discussing matters pertaining to sex and the 
sexual relations, one is usually handicapped by the 
wide-spread, prevailing, but absolutely wrong idea 
that such things should not be spoken of plainly, 
and especially to the very young. If mentioned at 
all, they are referred to in a vague and mysterious 
manner, which, instead of enlightening and instruct- 
ing in a proper way, merely arouses a deep and most 
dangerous curiosity. This curiosity demands a com- 
plete and plain understanding; but unfortunately for 
the benefit and the future well-being of our growing 
population, both male and female, this understand- 
ing is usually obtained elsewhere rather than at 
home — owing to a false idea of modesty or to igno- 
rance on the part of parents, who are the proper 
persons to instruct their offspring. 

There is no such false idea of modesty on the part 
of those who prey upon the ignorance of the inno- 
cent and virtuous. The truth of this assertion is so 
well established that not even the most conservative 

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10 SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 

person will attempt to deny it. It seems to me that 
it is our sacred duty to impart this knowledge of 
sex and sexual matters in a simple manner, so that 
it can be fully imderstood by our audiences, whether 
we address them through the medium of books or 
in person. What we tell them must be thoroughly 
imderstood, so that they can profit by our teachings 
and be prepared for their future duties. Such an 
education will enable oiu* sisters and daughters to 
protect their health and virtue. Those who refuse 
to profit by the proper knowledge which will be 
offered them in the pages to follow must expect to 
reap a harvest that is not pleasant to think about — 
consequences which are likely to cause both mental 
anguish and severe physical pain. 

In my talks on this subject, I shall speak in the 
same simple, straightforward way as* though a cook- 
ing lesson, let us say, was under discussion. So far 
as possible I shall avoid the use of medical terms. 
If, at the end of any of my talks, I have not made 
myself perfectly plain, please ask questions. (See 
Preface.) I shall be as thorough as I can up to 
what I deem necessary to your needs. It is not my 
intention to try' to make you finished students of med- 
icine, but when I am through you will be, I feel sure, 
better fitted for your life-woric. The prudish may 
find fault with my frankness; the very radical will 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 11 

perhaps complain that I do not go far enough. My 
aim will be to go far enough for your good, and to 
instruct you properly, without putting too " grown- 
up " thoughts into your heads. 

So that you may understand that which is to 
come later in my talks, and because I believe that 
you should have such a knowledge of your body, I 
will first describe those special organs which are 
peculiar to the female members of the human race. 
Among these organs we must include the breasts, 
which, although present in the male, usually develop 
and function only in the female. 

Now, the human body consists of the head, the 
neck, the chest, the abdomen, the legs, and the arms. 
The part of the body which concerns us now is the 
abdomen, for it is in this that the organs of the 
female, with the exception of the breasts, are 
located. 

The abdomen might be divided into an upper 
and a lower division or compartment. The lower 
we will call the pelvic compartment. There is no 
actual separation, as in the case of the chest and 
upper abdomen, where the diaphragm forms a real 
dividing wall. For our purposes we will say that 
all of the abdomen lying above an imaginary line 
drawn between the two upper tips of the hip bones 
is the upper compartment, and all lying below this 



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12 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

IS the lower. It is this lower or pelvic compartment 
with which we have to deal, as it is within it that the 
female sexual organs are contained To make the 
location of this imaginary line easier for you, I 
might say that in its " make believe '' coiu^e across 
the body its mid-point is usually situated about two 
inches below the navel, or " button " as some of you 
call it 

Now, this pelvic portion of the body is a bony 
framework consisting of that portion of the spine 
known as the sacrum, and a few of the lumbar ver- 
tebrae, in the back part, its sides and front consisting 
of the two hip bones known in technical terms as 
the OS innominati (Fig. i). The pictures you will 
'See later will show you the shapes of those bones, 
and how they are held together to form this " basin," 
in which the genital or sexual organs are contained. 
These bones are lined with muscular tissue. 

We will now proceed to a study of the female 
organs. We shall begin our study from within and 
gradually travel outward, as does the ovum, which 
I will tell you about later. The ovaries are the 
deepest in of the female sexual organs, and, in fact, 
the beginning of the female genital or sexual tract 
within the body, so we will start with them. 

The ovaries are two in number, one on the right 
side of the pelvic compartment and the other on the 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 18 



The pelvic cavi- 
ty in which are 
contained the fe- 
male genital or- 
gans 



Fig. X. — ^The human skeleton. 



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14 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

left side ( Fig. 2 ) . A gcxxi way to locate them would 
be to say that they are, on their respective sides, 
midway between the centre line of the body and the 
upper tips of the hip bones, but slightly below the 
imaginary line before referred to as the dividing 
line between the upper and the lower compartments 
of the abdomen. What do they look like? Just 

Tube 
Ovary 



id of 

lening 

na 



Pig. a. — ^This picture shows the internal female organs of generation as a 
whole— front view. 

draw this mind picture, and you will get an idea. 
Imagine two little, somewhat oval-shaped bodies, 
each about an inch and a half in length, three-quar- 
ters of an inch in width, and about a third of an 
inch in thickness. These most important organs — 
important because on the good health of them 
depends future child-bearing — ^weigh each about a 
quarter of an ounce, which is about as heavy as the 
contents of two ordinary teaspoonfuls of water. 
Having an important function to perform, they are 
well supplied with blood-vessels, so that they receive 
plenty of nourishment to enable them to carry out 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 15 

their work. They are also very well supplied with 
nerves, and these are of the highest order and most 
sensitive, as many of you who have received a blow 
in this region can testify. The ovaries are held in 
their respective places by being attached to a fold of 
tissue known as the broad ligament (Fig. 3). The 



Ovum 

Fig. 3. — Section of ovary showing female contribution to creation. 

ova, leaving the ovaries, come to the Fallopian tubes, 
SO we shall discuss them next. These are just exactly 
what their name signifies to you — ^tubes. Like the 
ovaries, they are two in number, a right and a left, 
and each is about four inches in length. Being tubes, 
they are hollow inside, and this opening is just about 
large enough to allow a very, very thin bristle to pass 
through. The ends of the tubes nearest the ovaries 



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16 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

are not joined to or connected with these latter 
organs, but these ends spread out into very large 
openings. To explain a little better, I might call 
the tubes flower-stems and the openings nearest the 
ovaries the flowers in full bloom. Picture to your- 
self, for instance, a chrysanthemum and its stem. 

The inner end of the tube is attached to the uterus 
or womb, as that likewise important organ is com- 
monly called. This would indicate to you that the 
inner ends of the tubes open into the womb. Another 
interesting point in the anatomy of the tubes is the 
fact that their inner surfaces are lined with a skin 
which we call a mucous membrane, from which are 
given off little whip^like processes which by their 
motion propel toward the womb anything which 
may get into the tubes. 

From the tubes we pass on to the uterus or womb, 
by which latter name I shall call this organ from 
now on. This important organ, the home of the 
growing unborn child at certain times, lies usually 
in about the median line of the body, tilted slightly 
forward toward the front wall of the abdomen at 
its upper part. In the virgin girl and in the woman 
who has never been in a child-bearing state, the 
shape may be compared to a pear turned upside 
down. Before it has taken part in the activity of 
child-bearing, it is about three inches long, two 
inches wide at its widest part, and about one inch 



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SEX TALKS.TO GIRLS 17 

thick. The womb is hollow, and in its normal virgin 
state (Fig. 4) weighs about an ounce to an ounce 
and a half. After it has once been started on its nor- 



FlG. 4. — ^This picture represents a view of some of the internal female 
genital organs. It is a side view as if the body had been divided from above 
downward, and half of it removed. The ovaries and tubes are not shown 
in this picture. 

mal physiological function, it never again becomes 
quite as small as it was before these activities began. 
The top of the womb usually extends an inch or 
slightly more above the level of the ovaries, its apex 
or lower end (remember its shape — a pear turned up- 
2 
1 



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18 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

side down) about two inches below the ovaries, and 
into the vagina (Fig. 5). 

We usually speak of the womb as consisting of 
two parts, the body and the neck, a slight constriction 
on the external coat of the womb marking off this 
division. The womb contains a great deal of mus- 
cular tissue, the use of which we will discuss later. 

Tube 
Tttbc with wall 

cut away 
showixig 
the inside 
of it 
Lcf* Right 

ovary ovary 

Womb wi • down 

cut awa> 
ing insi( 

Pig. 5* — Same as Fig. 2, but shows interior of womb and tubes, front wall 
of each having been removed. 

Its internal surface is lined with a mucous mem- 
brane which contains numerous glands. This will 
later enable you to imderstand why certain diseases 
are hard to cure when the womb has become con- 
taminated by them. 

I said that the lower end of the womb extended 
downward into the vagina, so next in order in our 
anatomy lesson is the vagina ( Fig. 6) . This is really 
a part of a tube or passageway which extends from 
behind the two folds of skin which, in the female, 
conceal from external view the real genital organs 
up to, around, and above the lower portion of the 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

middle line of the body as eflfectually to shield from 
view that which lies behind them. We call these 
folds the labia majora, or greater lips. Gently sepa- 
rating them and drawing each to its respective side, 
we come to another, similar but smaller, pair of cur- 
tains, if I may use this simile, and it is only on sepa- 
rating this second pair of lips, known as the labia 
minora, or lesser lips, that the entrance to the vagina 
is revealed. This entrance to the vagina is, as a 
rule, partly closed by a semicircular piece of skin 
known as the hymen, although this shape often 
varies. The significance of the hymen and the 
reason for its shape will be discussed later. 

I believe that the descriptions to which you have 
just listened, with the accompanying diagrams and 
actual drawings from life that are here for you to see 
and study, will give you a sufficient knowledge of 
these particular parts of your anatomy for all the 
purposes of our talks yet to come. 

Of the anatomy of the breasts, it is unnecessary 
to say much. As you know, they are two in number, 
one on the right, the other on the left side of the 
median line of the body. They are attached to the 
wall of the chest anteriorly, and consist principally 
of muscular and glandular or secreting tissue, from 
which little pipes or ducts lead outward to the 
nipples. 

If the wonders of your anatomy have surprised 



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yJi, SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

and interested you, still greater astonishment and 
interest await you, for if Dame Nature is a wonder- 
ful builder, she is still more wonderful in the 
mechanism of what she constructs, and we shall see 
that everything moves in a perfect cycle toward a 
certain end. When this end is achieved, another 
cycle of events is started toward another goal, and 
so on, imtil a point is reached from which there can 
be no further advance. 

Once again in our studies we shall start on the 
inside of the body and, as in our anatomy lesson, 
the ovary will be the first organ discussed. Let us 
consider somewhat its physiology and its fimction. 

In the ovaries are developed the contribution 
of the f emalp to the human race. This statement in 
itself reveals to you the great importance of these 
organs, and how necessary it is that they be guarded 
from disease or injury. No matter how healthy or 
normal the rest of the sexual tract may be, failure 
on the part of an ovary to put forth in a healthy 
condition its contribution to the human creation 
means that there can be from this ovary no creation. 
In medical circles investigations and discussions are 
constantly going on as to the why and wherefore of 
the birth of imperfect children, either in a mental or 
physical sense. I am rather inclined to think that 
the answer can be found in the condition of the male 
or female contribution to the birth of that child. It 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 23 

does not seem possible that unhealthy seeds can pro- 
duce as good plants as healthy ones; nor can even 
good seeds, fertilized by a poor fertilizer, be ex- 
pected to do as well, or vice versa. The ideal baby 
would seem, therefore, to be the result of both 
healthy male and female contributions to creation. 

I speak of male- and female contributions to 
creation; for, unlike some of the lower forms of 
life, the human female alone cannot produce a 
human being of even an imperfect sort, but only by 
the commingling and joining of her contribution to 
creation with that of the male, can it become a being 
of life and energy. 

The ovaries, therefore, are both factories and 
storehouses. In them certain substances are devel- 
oped, many at a time, into ova or eggs. During the 
process of ripening, these ova or human seeds are 
contained in separate compartments or sacs, in which 
each matures. The doctor's name for these little 
sacs is Graafian follicles. As each little sac loses 
its contents it gradually becomes obliterated, and it 
does lose its contents as soon as the ovum* is ripe or 
mature. As maturity becomes a fact, the ovimi 
ruptures the siu*face of the Graafian follicle, and 
also that of the ovary, and is discharged into the 
pelvic cavity, as we call this lower part of the abdom- 
inal cavity, a fact that I have already stated. You 
can get some idea of the small size of this human 



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S4 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

seed when I tell you that each ovary is estimated to 
contain from thirty-two to thirty-six thousand ova 
or eggs in process of growth. Expressing their size 
in figures, one would say that they are about 0.20 to 
0.30 mnt in diameter. 

So carefully balanced are Nature's works that, 
so far as we can ascertain, only one ovum matures 
and is discharged at a time, despite the fact that 
there are, as already stated, some sixty to seventy 
thousand human seedlings in process of ripening at 
the same time. Is this not a wonderful example of 
Nature's care? For you must know that in the 
human race it is usual for only one offspring to be 
bom at a time. Perhaps the reason why twins are 
sometimes bom to mothers is that something has 
gone wrong, and prevented this particular rule of 
Dame Nature's from being followed. 

I have merely given you a bare outline of what 
goes on in the ovaries. The details of the growth 
of the ovum or human seed in the ovary, even before 
the female child is actually bom, are most interest- 
ing, but would be out of place in our lesson, as I 
am not endeavoring to make you finished students 
of medicine but merely to give you some idea of 
yoiu*selves, so that you may look after your health 
and happiness in an intelligent way. 

When the mature ovum has been discharged 
from the ovary, it is attracted to and taken up by the 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 25 

Fallopian tube of the particular side on which the 
ovum has been discharged, and the open free end of 
which is, as I have already told you, larger than the 
end that is attached to the womb. When the ovum 
enters the tube at the larger end, the little whip-like 
processes which line its interior surface, of which 
we have spoken in our anatomy lesson, gently propel 
it through the tube toward the smaller end where 
the tube joins the womb, and thence it enters the 
womb. Dtu-ing this time, certain changes are taking 
place in the ovum, so that Nature allows it about 
one week in which to travel the four inches from the 
ovarian or outer end of the tube to and into the 
womb. 

You note, therefore, it is the function of the 
tubes to convey the ovum, or human seedling from 
the ovary to the womb, and that any disease or in- 
jury which would close the tubes or prevent the 
ovum from making this little journey would prevent 
childbirth, since, under such conditions, the ovum 
could not meet the male contribution to creation. 
Disease of the tubes ^n extend to them from three 
sources: (a) from the womb to which they are 
attached and into which their inner ends open; (6) 
from the pelvic cavity itself, because their outer or 
free ends open into this cavity; (c) from the ovaries, 
because of their close proximity. Once again you 



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26 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

see how necessary is good health for all parts of the 
body in order to benefit and protect all other ports. 

The womb, next in order in our study trip, is, 
under certain conditions, not unlike the ovary — ^both 
a place of development and a storehouse. In it the 
human seedling from the female, properly fertilized 
by the male contribution, begins its growth, ulti- 
mately to blossom into a baby — ^that pure and sweet 
triumph of himian love — ^and, when complete, it is 
retained in the womb imtil the physiological moment 
for its birth arrives. While the imborn baby re- 
mains in the womb, it is protected by it from various 
injurious conditions which would soon kill the little 
growing human plant, and through the medium of 
the blood-vessels of the womb it also receives proper 
nourishment for its growth. 

The womb has certain functions to perform at 
the time of the menstrual period, or, as many of you 
call it, the monthly period. Once again I will say 
a few words about health, for an unhealthy womb 
cannot properly perform its functions, and, when it 
does not, child-bearing is impossible, of course. 
Likewise, any disease of the womb is very liable to 
spread to other parts of the body, not only by exten- 
sion through the tubes, but also, on account of its 
great blood supply, by means of the blood-vessels. 
Other things beside disease, such as various injuries, 
lack of proper development, displacements, etc., may 



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prevent the womb from properly performing its 
functions. 

The vagina has certain secretions which come 
from the many glands in the mucous membrane 
which lines its inner surface, and it is the duty of 
these to destroy anything foreign that enters, and 
which might get within the womb unless destroyed. 
The vagina also plays an important part in the sexual 
relation, as it is within it that the male fertilizing 
fluid containing spermatozoa, the essential part or 
element for the growth of the ovum, is deposited, 
to favor the development of the aforesaid ovum into 
a human being. 

Here also disease may be very serious in its re- 
stdts. It may destroy the protective secretions of 
the vagina, it may set up various kinds of inflamma- 
tions and produce unpleasant discharges, it may 
cause the male contribution to creation to be de- 
stroyed before it can perform its duties to the ovum, 
and last but not least, it may cause diseases of the 
secreting glands with abscess formation, or its germs 
may lurk there for years and at any future time cause 
trouble for both mother and baby ; how, will be dis- 
cussed later. 

The other parts of the genital tract mentioned in 
our anatomy lesson also have certain minor func- 
tions to perform in the organism, but these are not 
important enough for you to burden your minds 



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28 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

with them. The chief parts and their fimctions we 
have now discussed in a general way, and, I believe, 
in sufficient detail, to enable you the better to under- 
stand what is to follow. Do not, however, get the 
idea that you know all that is to be known of the 
physiology and anatomy of the parts we have trav- 
elled over together, for you do not. I have only 
"just skimmed over the stu-face," as it were, my 
idea being that you should know yourselves only in 
a general way, leaving it to text-books on anatomy 
and physiology to give you more detailed informa- 
tion if this, for any reason, be necessary. 

I have not discussed the breasts particularly, 
because you already know that their function is to 
furnish nourishment in the shape of milk to infants 
from birth up to nine or ten months of age. How 
this milk is formed within the breasts is not essential 
to our talks nor to an understanding of them, there- 
fore I omit this detail. Suffice it to say that from 
the anatomy of the breasts, already briefly described 
to you, you know them to be made up of a number 
of small reservoirs, from each of which comes a 
little pipe or duct, and this carries the milk into a still 
larger reservoir from which other and larger pipes 
or ducts finally convey it to the nipples. It hardly 
seems necessary to state that each breast has but one 
nipple or outlet for the ntu*sing baby to suck. Only 
at certain times *do the breasts perform their physio- 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 29 

logical function: i,e,, when a baby is to be fed. 
There is a very definite but poorly understood rela- 
tion between the breasts and the female sexual or- 
gans below, by which various messages, let us call 
them, are transmitted between the two parts of the 
body: for instance, when the breasts are advised 
that at a certain time they should be ready to feed a 
baby. Unfortunately, this latter message is not 
always responded to by the breasts for various rea- 
sons, some of which will be spoken of later. 

One thing more and we will close our talk on 
the anatomy and physiology of yotu* special organs 
of generation. That one thing is the significance of 
the hymen at the entrance to the vagina. You will 
recall that I told you the dividing line between the 
vestibule and the vagina is a piece of skin which 
partly occludes the vagina from view. Its presence, 
unmutilated, usually indicates that the woman is a 
virgin — in other words, a girl who has not associated 
in a sexual way with a man. Its construction and 
position is such that the sexual act will destroy its 
integrity. When destrov&d during the sexual act 
the remnants of it asstmiAa certain peculiar appear- 
ance that is l^lf-lmlaMt^g ^d, to the trained eye, 
imdeniable eridagt^ has happened. It is 

rarely if even aestroyed in any other way but by an 
attempt to introduce something into the vagina. 

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mentioned the most common shape, the semicir- 
cular. Some resemble a sieve, whereas others may 
be circular with just a single opening in the centre. 
Some are so delicate that even a fine surgical instru- 
ment could not be passed through the opening with- 
out injuring the hymen. Of course, if there is no 
opening at all in the hymen, it is an abnormal one, 
and needs surgical treatment, an opening being 
necessary for the passing out of the menstrual blood 
and any other secretions which may be present 

REVIEW 

I. Why should matters pertaining to sex and sexual re- 
lations be part of the home training? 
II. In which part of the body are the female gen 
organs located? 

III. How do we divide this part for our purposes of study? 

IV. Locate and describe the ovaries. 

V. How are the Fallopian tubes placed? Describe their 
inner surfaces and functions. 
VI. Describe the womb, its location, size, shape, inner sur- 
face, and importance. 

VII. Why is disease here so apt to spread to other parts 

of the body? 

VIII. Beginning externally, describe the vagina. 

IX. In what sense are the ovaries factories? Describe fully. 
X. Where is the hymen? State its significance. 



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II 

During our first talk you formed some idea of 
the internal female sexual organs, and of the parts 
leading to them. You were told briefly the normal 
fimction of each. You were also told that, while 
certain low forms of animal life are so constituted 
that they contain all essentials for creation within 
themselves, in the higher forms of life the elements 
necessary for creation are in separate bodies, and 
these separate bodies are designated male and 
female. 

To the female is given the very high honor and 
privilege of growing the human seedling which 
later, after fertilization, develops into a human 
being. To the female is also given the great privi- 
lege of sheltering within her, while it is developing, 
the human plant which comes forth in full bloom at 
birth as a beautiful baby. And yet some women are 
so indifferent to this great tribute from Mother 
Nature to their good sense and ability, their kind- 
liness and gentleness, and their carefulness, that 
they seek to avoid this greatest blessing and honor 
to their sex — ^motherhood. It is hard to believe that 
such a thing can be, but it is a fact nevertheless. 

What is finer, grander, or more lovely in this 

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world than a fine baby? I know of nothing, and I 
think you do not. Truly has the well-born baby been 
called the " triumph of love," the expression of love 
at its highest and best. Note that I say a well-bom 
baby, and here the word is not used to designate 
riches in a monetary or worldly sense, but the rich- 
ness of love and affection of the highest kind in the 
holy bonds of matrimony. 

In order to accomplish this great mission, a 
healthy body is necessary, and especially healthy 
genital parts. This boon Nature grants to prac- 
tically all, for nearly all of you at birth have such 
parts; but through ignorance and neglect, or want 
of the care and attention which these parts should 
at various times and imder certain conditions receive, 
unhealthy changes may take place as you grow older, 
and these, while easily rectified if taken in time, cause 
vain regrets, unnecessary and avoidable pain, sorrow 
and trouble if allowed to become chronic. These 
changes may even be so serious as to prevent the 
sexual organs from performing their normal duties. 
Therefore, the avoidance of these pitfalls shall be 
our topic, and the time will be well spent for those 
of you who profit by what I am going to say. 

All of you remember that, as little girls, your 
breasts were but tiny, spotlike protuberances on the 
chest wall, and that your bodies were free from any 
growth of hair. You could rim and jump like the 



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boys, and join in all their games with the greatest 
zest. In fact, perhaps you prided yourselves on your 
ability to equal if not excel many of your boy friends 
at their own games and pastimes. 

As you grew older, however, a certain inborn 
consciousness came to you that in some way or other 
boys were different from girls, and their games 
began to lose their attraction for you, as being too 
rough and boisterous and no longer to your liking. 
You felt that little acts of comradeship that you 
formerly allowed without a second thought did not 
now seem just right, and could not be allowed. You 
did not know wherein they were wrong, yet some- 
thing within you made you feel that you were no 
longer a little girl, and that such acts were not proper 
in a " big " girl. You felt as if your little boy 
friends were to be kept at a distance, in a way, and 
that old familiarities were things of the past. 

Perhaps you became aware about this time that 
your breasts were growing larger and more notice- 
able : a matter which gave you no small concern, for 
in your imagination everyone whom you met was 
looking at you because of this, and you wished that 
your dresses in this region were not so tight as to 
make this increase in size conspicuous. You perhaps 
even wondered why these little protuberances on 
your body should begin to grow at this time, and 
when you asked you were given a vague, unsatis- 
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34 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

factory answer that told you nothing; whereas you 
should have been told that you were passing from 
little girlhood into the first stages of womanhood, 
and that the breasts were developing within so that 
they would be ready at the proper time to assume 
their normal duties. Not only must the special tissue 
of the breasts — i,e,_, that in which later milk is 
formed and secreted — develop, but likewise the 
muscular tissue; if the latter is allowed to develop 
normally — ^that is, unhampered by corsets or other 
tight apparel— it will become strong enough in the 
future to properly support the breasts and do away 
with a favorite excuse as to the necessity for corsets. 

Another thing of which you became aware was 
the fact that, in what we have called the genital re- 
gion, a few coarse hairs were making their appear- 
ance. These processes continued until the breasts 
had reached such a size as to be really noticeable, 
and the coarse hair, known as " the pubic hair,*' had 
increased, and that hair was appearing also on other 
parts of the body. 

Suddenly, one day, with or without unusual sen- 
sations, you discovered you were losing some blood, 
and that the place from which it was coming was 
that mysterious region about which no one at home 
would talk to you, except to tell you to keep it always 
covered, and about which you did not like to ask 
anybody away from home, for fear you would be 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 85 

doing wrong or asking something that you should 
not. You had heard in the street, perhaps, some 
coarse remarks about certain things, but in your 
girlish ignorance and innocaice you did not under- 
stand them, except to know by a sense of inborn 
modesty that they were indecent remarks, not fit to 
be made by anyone modest or right-minded, and not 
to be listened to voluntarily by any clean-minded 
person. 

This bleeding annoyed you very much. In fact 
it may have frightened you, and you may have tried 
to stop it in various ways that you had heard of for 
checking a hemorrhage. Many girls, remembering 
that cold water is said to be good for stopping a 
hemorrhage, have gotten into a cold bath — ^about the 
worst thing they could have done imder these cir- 
cumstances. At last, in despair and terror, you told 
some one of the terrible accident that was happening 
to you, after first making the confidante give the 
most sacred promise never to reveal your most sacred 
confidence, only to be told that all your terror and 
mental agony were unnecessary, as this happens to 
girls every month, and that you must wear a napkin 
or some sort of bandage for several days, so that the 
blood will not stain your wearing apparel. 

This is probably the extent of the knowledge 
most of you have even now of the menstrual or 
monthly periods. A few of you may have vague 



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86 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

ideas of what you should or should not do at this 
time. I will try to enlighten you further regarding 
this period of your lives. Of course the first ques- 
tion which comes to mind is. Why, and what, is the 
menstrual period? The question so simple to ask 
is not so easily answered ; in fact cannot be answered 
imless the statement " we do not know " can be con- 
sidered as such. Theories are many, but it would be 
of no practical use to you to give them here, so I 
will omit all. It might be interesting, however, for 
you to know that besides the female human being 
only the females of a few of the highest types of apes 
have this monthly function. This fact makes scien- 
tific and accurate investigation very difficult, and is 
probably the reason why no more has been added to 
otu- present store of knowledge. 

Ignorance of the nature of this function and how 
to take proper care of yourselves during the periods 
is inexcusable and harmful, and in some cases the 
results in the present are very serious, with conse- 
quences extending into the future. Perhaps you 
have wondered that this function should be estab- 
lished only after a certain age. The reason is very 
simple. You had not yet reached that period of 
complete development in which your organs were 
ready to fimction. And by functioning I do not 
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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 37 

tion — ^the act of assisting in creating another human 
being. 

Nature gives warning of the ripening of these 
organs, and sensible and observant mothers will then 
have a serious talk on sexual matters with their 
daughters. It is the foolish modesty or gross igno- 
rance of mothers in this regard that make my talks 
necessary and cause you to seek outside of your 
home circle the knowledge that your best friend^- 
i,e., your mother — ^should give you. This self-sanie 
false modesty or real ignorance has cost many a girl 
her life happiness, and started her on the downward 
road to shame and the vilest degradation, whereas 
a knowledge of her sexual f imctions imparted at the 
proper time would have resulted in the development 
of one more happy woman instead of an addition to 
the already large number of human female derelicts. 

This arrival at the age of puberty, as it is called, 
is at different times in various parts of the world. 
For instance, in India, the average age at which a 
girl shows by internal and external signs that she has 
arrived at this stage of life is about nine years. In 
certain parts of that coimtry a young woman of six- 
teen or seventeen years of age who is not married is 
considered an *' old maid." In Iceland, on the other 
hand, the average age at which a young woman ar- 
rives at the age of puberty is between sixteen and 
seventeen years. In our own country this phenom- 



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38 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

enon usually manifests itself between the thirteenth 
and fifteenth years, being somewhat dependent upon 
the nationality of the mother and the time that the 
mother herself had come to "the threshold of 
womanhood." Heredity plays quite a part in fore- 
casting when a girl is about to approach mature life. 
In some girls the time may come a little earlier, in 
others a little later. 

Among the more important external signs of 
puberty are the growth of the pubic hair and of hair 
on other parts of the body, the enlargement of the 
breasts, and a rounding out, as it were, of the gen- 
eral body contour. Internally, the ova are arriving 
at the stage of ripening, and the pelvic organs are 
developing so as to be ready for the first of their 
fimctions, that of menstruation. Mentally, the 
sexual sense has developed, and the girl becomes 
more self-conscious and retiring. Very soon after 
this she may menstruate for the first time. 

But before this really occurs, there may be 
months when, even though there is no show of 
blood, she has all the symptoms and sensations of 
an approaching menstrual period. She complains 
of vague pains everywhere or anywhere, often most 
severe in the back. She may have headaches, with 
dark rings imder her eyes. The breasts seem sud- 
denly to have filled out ; there may be a sense of ful- 
ness in them, or they may be painftd. The girl feels 



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depressed, languid, and drowsy. She complains of 
"a tired feeling," and prefers to lounge around 
rather than to be active. Mentally, also, she is in- 
clined to be sluggish, her lessons or other duties, 
perhaps, being attended to with but little interest. 

The young girl is inclined at this time to be very 
irritable, supersensitive, unreasonable, and easily 
moved to tears. Her appetite may or may not be 
affected. Some girls have a tendency to diarrhoea, 
whereas others become constipated. There may be a 
sense of fulness and weight in the pelvis and its con- 
tained contents. 

The first time a girl menstruates, the flow may 
be chiefly of mucus tinged with blood; later, how- 
ever, as the function becomes established, blood will 
predominate. After menstruating the first time, 
several months may elapse before there is another 
period, or menstruation may thereafter rectu" regu- 
larly every twenty-eight days. As a rule, every girl 
who has arrived at the age when the monthly periods 
are established has one every twenty-eight days, or, 
putting it another way, has practically thirteen 
periods of menstruation* in a year. There are ex- 
ceptions to this rule; some girls have more than this 
number, as they menstruate regularly — ^notice, I 
say regularly— every twenty-one days ; others, every 
twenty-two days, and so on up to the regular inter- 
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40 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

Where this interval is regularly other than 
twenty-eight days it is not to be considered as an 
irregular menstrual epoch. It is only when the time 
between a girl's periods varies that it can really be 
called irregular. Therefore, we can say that men- 
struation occurring more often than every four 
weeks, imless a shorter interval of time is a regular 
and fixed habit, is an irregular menstruation, and 
the doctor should be consulted regarding it. 

The periods usually last from f oiu* to six days, 
with the greatest loss of blood on the second and 
third days. When a girl first menstruates, the loss 
of blood is apt to be greater than when the periods 
have become established. But, even in the early 
days of the menstrual habit, menstruation should 
not last longer than the normal number of days, nor 
should the girl be permitted to lose an excessive 
amount of blood. Of course, even in those in whom 
the habit is well established, a physician should be 
consulted to correct what is wrong if the period con- 
tinues after the normal six days, or if there is an 
excessive flow of blood after the third or fourth day. 

Likewise, the menstrual period is not normal if 
it last too short a time, or if the loss of blood is 
scant, or practically niL Here also the services of 
your medical adviser are needed, and delay only 
makes a bad situation or condition very much worse. 
Painful menstruation is not only abnormal but the 



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SEX TALES TO GIRLS 41 

only reason for your monthly period being a time 
of torture, to be dreaded, is either that you enjoy 
being a martyr or prefer this suffering to consulting 
a doctor. There may be a few cases, in single girls, 
where, seemingly, our remedies fail, but with the 
great majority relief or cure follows. So, again I 
say to you, do not suffer unless you desire to do so. 
The girl who does not menstruate at all after arriv- 
ing at the proper age, or who only menstruates at 
long intervals, should also consult a doctor because 
there may be something anatomically wrong which 
can be easily corrected and save her from serious 
consequences. Let what I have already said receive 
your serious consideration, as well as what I have 
still to say on this subject. It is important to you 
in the present, and will be so in the future. 

What will help to make a girl healthy so that 
when she grows up her menstrual periods will be 
normal and her later duties as a mother easy of ac- 
complishment ? In the first place, every child, male 
and female, should be taught a fixed daily habit of 
bowel evacuation. It is a most important f imction, 
and neglect of it not only causes trouble indirectly in 
the genital organs, but disturbs the general health as 
well ; therefore its importance is two- fold, for with 
poor general health the genital organs must suffer 
also. You all like to be clean without ; therefore why 
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42 SEX TALKS TO GIKLS 

is less harmful than internal uncleanliness, but clean- 
liness both within and without is essential to good 
health. There is absolutely no need for you to be 
constipated because your mother or your sister is or 
was, popular belief to the contrary notwithstanding. 

Another bad habit among women is the endeavor 
to avoid passing their urine as often as they should. 
For some mysterious reason, never explained even 
when inquired into, they seem to try to see how 
many hours they can go without being absolutely 
forced to empty their bladders. I am oftentimes 
amazed at what my women patients tell me regarding 
their ability to retain their urine without apparent 
discomfort or annoyance. This is harmful for 
several reasons : 

An abnormally or over-distended bladder needs 
more room in the pelvis than is normally allotted to 
it, and in order to obtain this extra space it is very 
liable to push the womb out of its place, the latter 
organ being the easiest to displace for the benefit of 
the bladder. Displacement of the womb from its 
normal position is one of the most common causes 
of pain at the menstrual period. Moreover this con- 
stant distention of the walls of the bladder beyond 
their normal limits means that, gradually, the walls 
of the bladder will lose their normal strength or 
tone, and urinary incontinence or inability to control 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 43 

the bladder will result, and may be temporary or 
become chronic. 

Anaemia, which may be due to constipation (as 
are many cases in women) or any other cause, is 
detrimental to the normal act of menstruation, and 
accounts for the sufferings of a great many girls 
and women at this time. In our efforts to educate 
growing girls toward high collegiate standards we 
should carefully consider their physical health and 
normal development. 

Anything which tends to cause congestion of the 
pelvic organs is harmful ; for example, false sexual 
excitement SLrousedlby miisic, picttu-es, a touch, by 
masturbation Ww(m^ kipt. I call it false sexual 
excitement, jM^x^ jjt is not a normally aroused 
sexual desire, nor ean it be satisfied or completed by 
normal sexual contact, which, of course, can legiti- 
mately take place only between husband and wife. 

A girl's mode of dress is also a factor in sexual 
health. You cannot lace tightly without distorting 
and compressing the body and its contained organs. 
If you have been brought up to wear no body-tor- 
turing, health-wrecking corset at all, you are indeed 
most blessed. Unfortimately, just at the time when 
they are liable to do most harm — ^that is, at the stage 
of development — ^you are induced by or you induce 
your fond but foolish mother to put this harness on 
you. 



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Warmth in dress is also essential to the organs 
which take part in the menstrual period. These very 
dehcate organs are not rendered better able to per- 
form their functions by chilling. In fact, not only 
does cold retard the performance of their physio- 
logical duties, but it is liable to produce conditions 
with more than serious consequences. 

Another and most important thing which not 
only helps to prevent normal menstruation but sub- 
sequently the proper performance of duties at the 
time of childbirth, and which may even affect the 
health of the offspring, is the ciursed institution of 
child labor in our industries. 

Our civilization is not nearly so high as we 
flatter ourselves it is; otherwise our women would 
not be permitted to perform the various kinds of 
labor in which they are now engaged without regard 
to their health and happiness or the well-being of 
posterity. 

I am still old-fashioned enough to decry the 
overworking of women in the business world, and 
their plunge into so-called society as it is constituted 
to-day, one mad whirl of dancing, mostly of an im- 
proper and suggestive kind, flirtations, gambling, 
and other supposed pleasures. I hope that at some 
day, not too far distant and in time to save our 
nation from the fate of ancient Rome, people will 
come to their senses, and we will establish a better 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 45 

order of things, with more protection for women 
and children in industry, and a neighborly social 
life that means proper pleasure for all, and not moral 
and financial ruin, as does society to-day. You will 
all be healthier for it because employers, being less 
absorbed in money matters, will be more apt to re- 
member that women are women, whether in their 
own homes or elsewhere, and that if their own 
wives and daughters need special consideration at 
certain times, so do their female employees. With 
fewer social duties, these wives and daughters will 
also have time to realize the necessity of taking care 
of themselves, and will do so. 

When this happy time for all women arrives, the 
incomes of many physicians, rest cures, health re- 
sorts, and sanitariums will be lessened. In fact the 
number of the insane will also be diminished. It is 
delightful to look forward to this time, and I hope 
we shall live to see such an advance in our civiliza- 
tion; a time when each of us will unselfishly seek 
the welfare of others because we wish to advance 
the cause of humanity and to be the ancestors of a 
constantly improving race, a time when the world 
will be brighter and better because we have lived in 
it.* Let us try to bequeath to those who come after 

♦During the menstrual period, and particularly during 
the first half of it, rest and quiet are to be sought, and highly 
spiced foods or salads containing vinegar, or like sauces, are to 
be avoided, as, in fact, all acid or alcoholic liquids or foods. 



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46 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

us health, happiness, and contentment, instead of a 
legacy of disease, selfishness, and unhappiness. 

REVIEW 

I. Describe briefly the internal, female sexual organs and 

the parts leading to them. 

II. What is the great privilege of womanhood and what 

is absolutely necessary to its successful accom- 
plishment ? 

III. Describe the change, mental and physical, from the 

" little girl " to the " big girl,'* 

IV. Name some of the changes preliminary to menstruation. 
V. Why does this appear only after a certain age, and what 

is the mother's duty at this time? 
VI. How often should the menstrual period occur, and what 
should be the normal length of a period? 

VII. State different conditions for which a doctor should be 

consulted. 

VIII. What important daily function should be established to 

promote normal menstruation? 
IX. Why is retention of the urine harmful? 
X. Give three factors opposed to sexual health. 



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Ill 

In this talk we are going to discuss some of the 
bad habits of girls, habits which, if aily of you are 
addicted to them, should be corrected. 

Let us again speak briefly of constipation, 
although we discussed it in our last talk. I told you 
that if the rectum be filled up with food debris it 
will require more space than is normally allotted 
to it in the pelvis, and, therefore, as in the case of 
the distended bladder, it will make room for itself 
by encroaching on the womb, displacing that organ 
to either side or forward. Again, this accumulation 
of food debris — i.e., fecal matter, — causes a disten- 
tion of the rectum, which, if it become chronic, pro- 
duces unpleasant rectal conditions, even the extreme 
one of partial or complete loss of rectal control. 

The pressure of the fecal matter on the veins of 
the rectal mucous membrane impedes the return of 
the blood from the lower extremities and lower part 
of the body toward the heart, and the resulting 
dilation of these veins causes the formation of hem- 
orrhoids, or, as you have probably always heard them 
called, piles. The invasion of the fecal mass by 
germs or bacteria which cause fermentation pro- 
motes the formation of foul gases, which not only 

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assist in distending the bowels, but, on being 
absorbed into the blood, are carried to all parts of 
the body, poisoning the entire system, thereby weak- 
ening the normal bodily resistance and vitality, and 
causing many sick headaches, vague pains, disturb- 
ances of the stomach, painful menstruation, bad 
breath, and other unpleasant things. 

These poisons, circulating in the blood, destroy 
the blood corpuscles themselves, and in this way 
bring about an anaemia of a not very mild form. 
The blood corpuscles which are not destroyed are 
weakened in their capacity as carriers of body novlr- 
ishment to the various parts of the body on their way 
through the arterial system after they leave the 
heart, and as carriers of waste on their way back 
to the heart through the veins. So, therefore, in this 
way also is the vitality of the entire body lowered, 
viz., through lack of proper nourishment for one 
thing, and through lack of proper removal of the 
waste of the system for another thing. 

You can see from all that has been said about 
constipation that it is rather a bad thing with which 
to be affected. You can and should avoid it, not by 
the constant taking of medicine, but by the forma- 
tion of a proper habit which requires you to respond 
to this demand of nature at a definite time daily, by 
proper exercises tending to strengthen the abdom- 
inal and intestinal muscles; by the eating of proper 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 49 

t 
food at regular intervals ; by the eating of ripe fruits 
both cooked and raw, and of plenty of fresh vege- 
tables properly prepared ; by the drinking of plenty 
of water, mostly between meals, and by a general 
building up of a run-down body. 

I spoke to you a few minutes ago of the germs 
of fermentation attacking the fecal mass in the 
bowel. I might say, for the benefit of all, that these 
germs are present, practically, in all of you ; there- 
fore the evil results from their presence will be felt 
whenever constipation is present. 

I have also been asked how one can form the 
very valuable daily habit of a bowel evacuation at a 
certain time. Much more easy it is than it seems to 
be. First, let me say that there is some dispute as 
to the best time for this evacuation, some claiming 
that it is just before bedtime, others just after aris- 
ing, while still others think that immediately after 
breakfast is the best hotq:. I will not burden your 
minds with the pros and cons advanced by the vari- 
ous adherents of these hours. Personally, I favor 
immediately after arising, and then a bath, so that 
one feels clean within and without to start the day. 

Now, suppose you wish to cure yourself of the 
habit of constipation, and to have a daily evacuation 
on arising. The way to do it is to go to the toilet 
every day at this time with your mind intent on 
what you wish to accomplish, and to remain there 
4 



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50 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

for five or ten minutes ; do not strain, for this favors 
pile formation within and without. Keep this up 
for several days. If there be no voluntary result a 
small quantity of cascara sagrada mixture may be 
taken to assist. You will have to try it for several 
days to ascertain just the right time of day to take 
this medicine in order to have it act at the desired 
time. 

After getting the bowels to act at this time with 
the aid of medicines, gradually reduce the dosage 
until the bowels move without it. Do not use saline 
cathartics to move your bowels except on special oc- 
casions ; they help to produce anaemia, and most of 
you need no help toward this condition. Do not use 
so-called lapactic pills, saline laxative waters, or 
various constipation pills, tablets, mixtures, etc., as 
most of these are not cures for constipation, but 
things which, once taken, you must keep on taking to 
keep from being constipated. In speaking of the 
above, I refer to the taking of them regularly, for, of 
course, there are times when the physician himself 
will order some of them to relieve certain conditions. 
Enemata, or injections, as you call them, are always 
to be condemned because they tend to distend the 
bowel and, by constant over-distention, to make it 
lose its normal elasticity, i.e., its muscular power of 
contracting and expanding. 

You note I have spent quite a little time on this 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 51 

subject of clean bowels; and this, in itself, should 
convince you of its great importance to you, so far as 
your health, comfort, and happiness are concerned. 

Now a few more words about the undue reten- 
tion of urine in the bladder. We have already 
spoken of the detrimental effect of this upon the 
normal position of the womb, of its secondary effect 
upon the fimctions of the womb, and of the possible 
effect of gradual but chronic distention of the blad- 
der. This distention may cause acute paralysis of 
the bladder, requiring the urine to be drained off 
artificially — an unpleasant and somewhat serious 
procedure, which, unless done very carefully and 
with everything as clean as if for a surgical opera- 
tion, may lead to such operation. 

The urine, if retained in the bladder an undue 
length of time, favors the formation of solid sub- 
stances, or stones, composed of the various constit- 
uents of the urine. Moreover, when the urine con- 
tains, as it may under certain circumstances, an irri- 
tating substance, lack of tone in the bladder muscles 
permits it to remain there longer than it should, this 
causing inflammation of the lining or mucous mem- 
brane of the bladder, and prompt treatment by the 
physician is necessary to prevent a very serious 
condition. 

Do not think that I am trying to alarm you by 
anything I have already said or by anything I am 



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52 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

going to tell you in our talks still to come. I am 
simply trying to give you plain, frank, and unvar- 
nished truths, in simple language that you can fully 
understand, for yotu" guidance in the present and 
futtu"e. These truths will be of value to you if you 
accept them in the spirit in which they are offered, 
and if you will profit by the knowledge imparted. 

Cleanliness is the next topic, and likewise a very 
important one. 

Body cleanliness is an asset toward good health, 
and is most essential in the immediate region of the 
genital organs, including the breasts. Dirt, or the 
residue of perspiration allowed to collect around the 
nipples, is liable to cause either internal or external 
inflammation and lead to abscess formation. The 
same accumulation in the folds imder the breasts is 
liable to cause the same results. 

Below, in the region of the external genitals, the 
same accumulations may be added to residue of 
dried urine and, perhaps, discharges from within. 
Lack of cleanliness here means chafing, severe, con- 
stant, and annoying itching, which, once established, 
is hard to cure, bad odor, perhaps infection within 
and without, with possible abscess formation. 
Where there is no leucorrhoea, or ** whites,'' as many 
of you call this disagreeable and unnecessary dis- 
charge, or have heard it so called, it will be pro- 
duced if any of this debris is carried within, as it 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 53 

most likely will be — and leucorrhoea is a disagreeable 
affection, as many of you already know. 

To forestall your later question, I will say here 
that it can be cured; the simpler the variety the 
easier the cure. But why not avoid having it, as long 
as it is preventable? If it be not acquired, you will 
not need to go to the expense and trouble of having 
it cured. 

You all dislike having to undergo an examina- 
tion or any treatment of these parts, so try to keep 
yourselves well in this particular, and the chances 
of escaping the above-mentioned trials are much in- 
creased, for this condition is the tuiderlying cause 
of many others in this region. 

Of course, all legcbrrhjDeas are not the same and, 
therefore, this discharge'lFrom within must be care- 
fully investigated in order that it may be given 
proper treatment. Instead of being a simple catar- 
rhal discharge, it may contain pus, or be contami- 
nated with the results of a gonorrhoea. As you will 
be told later, owing to our present loose standard of 
morals for men, a standard which I hope my little 
book entitled " Ten Sex Talks to Boys " will help 
to correct, many pure, unmarried girls become ob- 
jects of suspicion, so far as the nature of a leucor- 
rhoea is concerned. 

Even during the menstrual period, " cleanliness 
is next to godliness," the popular idea to the con- 



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54 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

trary notwithstanding. Do I mean by this that you 
may have the luxury of a bath and cleanHness during 
this time? I most certainly do, for I see no reason 
to the contrary. Of course, on the first or second 
days and, in some cases, on the third day also, you 
must be content with tepid sitz-baths, but after that 
there is no reason why a full tub-bath cannot be 
taken. Remember, however, that I have not told 
you that you may take very hot or very cold baihs, 
nor have I told you that you may swim in outdoor 
or indoor, fresh or salt water pools. I have merely 
stated that you may take a bath in a tub wherein the 
water is moderately warm, but you are to stay in it 
only long enough to give yourselves a quick washing, 
being careful to avoid cfiillin*^ywhen you leave the 
bath. Attention to these *detans will permit you to 
keep your whole body clean at this time without 
danger to your health or interference with the men- 
strual function. 

Some of my girls have told me that they have 
been advised to take a douche after each period, as 
well as at other times for certain conditions. I con- 
sider this remarkably poor advice to give to a young 
woman whose hymen is intact, and if it is ever given 
to those of you who belong to the above class, I 
advise you most strongly not to follow it. Girls 
whose hymens are not intact are regarded with sus- 
picion, so far as their virtue is concerned ; and if you 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 56 

will recall the position of, and the various shapes of 
the hymen, as described to you in my first talk, you 
can readily imderstand that the use of a douche «dv\cloc 
nozzle might injure t his little sentinel of your vir- 
ginity or sexual purity, and put you in a position not 
much to your liking. You cannot see what you are 
doing while you are attempting to insert it, so you can 
see just how likely are the chances of your harming 
yourselves in this way. If a doctor, for any medical 
reason, has to interfere with the hymen in any way, 
he usually gives the patient a letter to that effect for 
her protection in the future. To a single woman 
whose hymen is Intact, a douche should be given only 
by some one who understands how to do it without 
injury to this little piece of skin, and to some girls a 
douche could not be given at all without interfer- 
ence with the integrity of the h3ntnen. 

In a later talk I will have something to say re- 
garding dress. The evil of corset wearing has 
already been mentioned in a general way, so far as 
tight lacing goes. That, however, is not the only 
bad point in corset wearing. Suppose we spend a 
little time in discussing some of the others. 

By their shape, and by the fact that they can be 
worn very tight, corsets retard the muscular devel- 
opment of the back and tend to produce round back, 
rotary lateral curvature, and weak back, the latter 
often accompanied by a great deal of pain and dis- 



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66 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

comfort. The deformity so produced causes vari- 
ous displacements of the internal organs, and thereby 
becomes a factor in the causation of painful, and 
even irregular, menstruation. 

The development of the abdominal muscles is 
also interfered with, thereby favoring constipation, 
rupture of the navel later in life, and prolongation 
of the time of childbirth in which they play a very 
important part ; and the lack of tone in these same 
abdominal muscles weakens the support for the 
abdominal contents and thereby induces various 
menstrual disturbances. With the tight-fitting, and 
still more with the tightly-laced corset, the abdomen 
and its important contents, the vital organs of life, 
are pushed out of place, distorted in shape, and con- 
stricted in volume. There may be such a thing as 
a sensible corset — I am sure there is — ^but certainly 
it is rarely in actual use. 

I repeat, however, what I said before, that the 
wearing of a corset is imnecessary, foolish, and con- 
trary to the laws of health, therefore not conducive 
to your welfare and happiness. The wearing of any- 
thing tight around the waist or chest is imhealthful. 
Remember the women of antiquity who were re- 
nowned for their faces and figures, the beauty of 
which has been handed down to us through the cen- 
turies, and then recall their dresses of loose, flowing 
style, and the loose, broad sandals they wore instead 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 57 

of lU-fitting, high-heeled, narrow, pointed shoes, 
several sizes too small, as do some of the girls of 
to-day. 

My talks were not intended to be on dress-re- 
form, so I mention only a few articles of your ap- 
parel which are in every-day use and really detri- 
mental to your health. Later on, I shall probably 
have to mention some other things, when I speak of 
immodesty, unintentional perhaps, but immodesty, 
nevertheless. 

The next bad habit I will mention is one which, 
unfortimately, is prevalent in both sexes and alike 
harmful to both. When practised by one girl it is 
harmful enough, but when practised between girls 
it is a most pernicious habit, which should be vigor- 
ously fought against. 

Right here I want to tell yoti as emphatically as 
I can that the sexual relation, even though a normal, 
physiological function, is absolutely unnecessary to 
the health or well-being of either sex. You will, then, 
readily understand that neither illegitimate sexual 
relations nor masturbation need ever be indulged in. 

Many girls who imagine they feel the need of 
sexual gratification are entirely mistaken, and are, 
in reality, suffering from certain conditions in or 
about the genital organs which, if corrected by their 
physicians, would stop the sensations aroused by 
these irritating, unhealthy conditions. Again, some 



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58 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

have their sexual passions falsely aroused by the 
food they indulge in, by liquor of various kinds, by 
so-called " funny " stories or jokes dealing with the 
sexual relation, by the company which they keep, 
and last, but by no means least, by the pleasures in 
which they participate, the kind of plays they see, 
and of books they read. 

Read only books worth while, or, if you will read 
trashy ones, avoid those which have no other reason 
for being put on the printing press but that they are 
immoral and calculated to ^ouse sexual feelings. 
Let the publisher who brings out this kind of book 
find to his cost that he cannot profitably set about to 
fill your minds with unhealthy thoughts which may, 
in the long run, be your ruin. It is the same with 
the theatres. Patronize those which produce 
" clean '' plays, and show the managers who debase 
your sex by causing members of it to appear on the 
stage in various phases of imdress, or those whose 
plays are passion-arousing, or unclean from a 
moral standpoint, that failure, financial and other- 
wise, will be their portion. 

Masturbation is, as some of you may know, the 
arousing of the sexual desire and the satisfaction of 
it in other than the usual way, according to the laws 
of nature, y^he female may practise it in many 
ways, but I will not go into details ; some of them are 
too disgusting for utterance. This much must 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS ^^ 

be said, however, as it is important: Masturbation, Aa^ 
if indulged in to excess, will cause a breakdown of ^^'^ 
the nervous system, and cause you to end your days ^^ ^w^ 
in a madhouse, or send you to an early grave. It is 
but just to explain to you that excessive normal sex- 
ual indulgence, even though legitimate, will do like- 
wise. In either case, is it worth while? There is 
more in life than merely the sexual passions. If any 
of you who are my auditors are guilty of indulging 
in the pernicious habit of masturbation, I advise you 
to stop it at once, for your own present and future 
good. If your own will-power is too weak to accom- 
plish this without moral and medical support, I ad- 
vise you to consult your family physician at once. 
Give him your full confidence, and, if he be worthy of 
the name, you will have his full sympathy and aid. 

To those of you who are ignorant of the methods 
of masturbation in the female, I would advise you 
strongly to remain in ignorance. Ignorance is really 
better than too much knowledge on this subject, and 
I strongly advise you against those of your girl 
friends who would enlighten you. They are dan- 
gerous, and probably unfit companions in other 
ways. 

Choose your friends most carefully. Have, if 
you will, many acquaintances, but admit to your 
circle of friends only the best, and this refers to 
boys as well as to girls. 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

Avoid girls who are too affectionate and demon- 
strative in their manner of talking and acting with 
you; who are inclined to admire your figure and 
breast development; who are inclined to be just a 
little too familiar in their actions toward you; who 
are inclined to be rather free and careless in the dis- 
play of themselves in your presence ; who press upon 
you too earnestly invitations to remain at their 
homes all night, and to occupy the same bed they do. 
When sleeping in the same bed with another girl 
old or young, avoid " snuggling up " close together. 
Avoid the touching of sexual parts, including the 
breasts, and, in fact, I might say avoid contact of 
any parts of the body at all. Keep your night robe 
about you so that you are as well protected from out- 
side contact as its size will permit, and let your con- 
versation be of other topics than sexuality. Do not 
lie in each other's arms when awake or falling 
asleep; and, after going to bed, if you are sleeping 
alone or with others, just bear in mind that beds are 
sleeping places. When you go to bed, go to sleep 
just as quickly as you can. If possible, avoid sleep- 
ing with anyone else. It is more healthful and sani- 
tary to sleep in a separate bed. And, although this 
is a step in advance of my next talk, I would say that 
certain diseases, both those affecting the genital 
organs and others, are often conveyed through con- 
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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 61 

You can see for yourselves, therefore, that separate 
beds are good for more reasons than one. 

I feel that what I have said here is a very brief 
summary of a serious, yet most delicate subject. I 
have not said much, and have tried to choose my 
words most carefully, because I did not want to 
suggest to your minds any false ideas, nor to offend 
the modesty of the most innocent or most puritanical 
of my auditors. Yet the subject of masturbation is 
a serious and important one and had to be taken up, 
and I should feel remiss in my duty toward you if I 
had not said enough to impress upon you the im- 
portance of avoiding this most pernicious habit if 
you are still innocent of self-indulgence, and to have 
convinced those of you who may have practised it 
that you should not do so, and that you can be cured 
of such a habit 

The evils of masturbation which, as you have 
already learned, can be both mental and physical, 
are, first, an unnatural mode of satisfying the sexual 
appetite when it is aroused ; second, it leads to over- 
indulgence which is extremely harmful both men- 
tally and physically, and, as I have stated, over-in- 
dulgence in even the normal sexual habit is extremely 
harmful; third, it is enervating and causes secretive 
habits, and when one practises deceit in one way it 
becomes easy to be deceitful in other ways, and 
lessens one's sense of honor and high ideals; fourth, 



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62 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

it brings about a chronic productive inflammation in 
all the sexual system which leads to serious con- 
sequences not only here, but also in the nervous 
system; fifth, in some of those who become slaves 
to it there is a loss of the normal sexual appetite, and 
this is not desirable for the future of yourselves or 
the race in general. 

These are only a few of the reasons why I have 
spoken on this subject at all. There are others, but 
time will not permit me to discuss them all. I have 
told you enough to demonstrate that masturbation 
is an imnatm-al, harmful, and, in every way, unnec- 
essary practice, and the wise girl will absolutely re- 
frain from it Those who do not must, whether 
willing or not, take the consequences they bring 
upon themselves, [if you will just beardh jjjfind that 
masturbation or actual sexual rel^Ams are abso- 
lutely unnecessary to either man or woman, you are 
not liable to slip into immoral ways. StT- 1 % 

Again, I say, study most carefully those whom 
you select for friends and see whether they are 
worthy of being cultivated as such, and I warn you 
to let this study extend to both sexes. There are 
many young men with whom you should not asso- 
ciate because their reputations are not good, or be- 
cause you have noticed something in them which 
makes you feel you cannot safely be seen with them. 
Put your girl acquaintances of whom you would 
make friends under the same close scrutiny, for as 



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SEX TALKS TO GIELS 63 

many girls have learned bad habits or have strayed 
into paths of immorality through females as through 
males. 

Let me tell you that some girls are low enough 
to accept pay for bringing about the moral ruin of 
members of their sex; and, imfortunately, their 
number is not small, for they are to be f oimd every- 
where, in the smallest village as well as in the largest 
town. Girls who have become discontented with 
their lot are easily influenced by the sweet, honeyed 
lies of these vile creatures. Beware of strange 
women, as well as of strange men, who seek to 
shower favors and other things upon you for no 
apparent reason except that they are strangely at- 
tracted to you. If you do not, you will live to re- 
gret it. Thousands of your sex already have, and 
lie in nameless graves away from home, most likely 
in a pauper's burying-grotmd, because they had 
become so degraded in name and fact as to be lost 
to " the old* folks at home." 

REVIEW 

I. How are hemorrhoids caused and how the formation of 

gases ? 

II. How does constipation affect the blood corpuscles? 

III. How may a habit of correct bowel evacuation be estab- 

lished? Explain fully. 

IV. Describe the ways in which the bladder may be affected 

by undue retention of the urine. 
V. Name one great asset toward good health and describe 
its importance in the region of the genital organs. 



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64 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

VI. What is leucorrhcea? Mention some of its most dis- 
agreeable features. 
VII. How can cleanliness be observed during the menstrual 

period and what must be avoided? 
VIII. What makes corsets harmful? State fully. 
IX. Explain some of the many evils of masturbation. 
G? X. Explain how it may be avoided as regards the arousing 
of sexual desire by acquaintances, reading, etc. 

A Ct/4 oor "Vke qoi^^-d^ 



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IV 

In this, the fourth talk of our series, we will 
take up the subject of venereal diseases, the most 
loathsome of all human ills that leave disgrace and 
suffering in their wake; diseases that can blight a 
person's life from the very minute of coming into the 
world until the leaving of it; diseases that may 
cause lifelong suffering and insanity; diseases that 
in their ravages affect the innocent just as severely 
as the guilty. Worst of all is the fact that they could 
not only be prevented, but entirely stamped out of 
the world. Proper education concerning sex, given 
to both sexes, combined with the practical applica- 
tion of the knowledge thus obtained, would pro- 
mote human health and happiness to an inestimable 
extent. 

Only those who practise medicine can realize the 
enormous amount of damage done the human race 
by these diseases, and they know that my statements 
are not exaggerated. Question them, and perhaps 
you will be convinced that not only do I not exag- 
gerate, but my statements are most moderate, the 
language in which they are couched by far too mild, 
to do justice to this shameful, disgraceful, and re- 
volting state of affairs. 

5 65 



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66 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

Just think of it, 30 out of every 100 blind per- 
sons that you see lost their sight at birth from one 
of the diseases designated as venereal; whereas 
others became Wind later in life from the pus of this 
same disease! Others again lost their sight through 
another of this class of disease. 

The asylums for the insane have inmates, both 
old and yoimg, who can be coimted among the vic- 
tims of venereal diseases. Probably 75 women out 
of every 100 requiring siu-gical operations upon the 
sexual organs could trace the origin of their trouble 
to venereal disease. The number of men who could 
trace the need of operative procedures to such a 
source has never been estimated, but the percentage 
must be very large. Nature certainly exacts a heavy 
toll for violation of the laws of morality, being 
somewhat imreasonable, perhaps, in her exactions, 
because she makes the innocent suffer with the 
guilty, — the children with the parents, the innocent 
wife with the guilty husband, or the reverse, as the 
case may be. 

We call these diseases venereal because of the 
parts affected by them, the word " venery " referring 
to certain things pertaining to these organs, just as 
we designate various diseases of the heart, for in- 
stance, as cardiac diseases. The two principal ven- 
ereal diseases are gonorrhoea and syphilis. We will 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 67 

discuss them both, and first the more common of the 
two, viz., gonorrhoea. 

Gronorrhoea is an acute, infectious disease caused 
by a germ known as the gonococcus of Neisser, Dr. 
Neisser having been the discoverer of this particular 
enemy of the human race. This germ is highly viru- 
lent or poisonous, and the inflammatory processes 
set up by it are very destructive. For instance, 
gonorrhoeal pus in the eyes means total destruction 
of the eyesight unless exceedingly prompt treatment 
is instituted. 

Gonorrhoea is usually transmitted from person to 
person in the performance of the normal sexual act, 
the infected person being, of course, the source of 
infection for the other ; therefore the usual place of 
infection in the female is the vagina. This infec- 
tion, however, can be conveyed by an unclean toilet 
seat which has become contaminated from use by a 
person with this loathsome disease, and the toilet seat 
need not necessarily be one outside of your own 
home. It can be conveyed by soiled dressings from 
a case of gonorrhoea, by unclean instruments which 
have been used about such a case and then not thor- 
oughly cleaned, or by fingers which have been in 
contact with gonorrhoeal pus. Masturbation by an- 
other person who is so infected, and may, therefore, 
have some of the pus on her hands, is a very apt way 
of conveying the disease from one to another. 



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68 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

Next to the vagina, the eye is probably the most 
common seat of direct infection by this loathsome 
disease. Of course, infection of the eye is usually 
accidental, and is due to rubbing it with a soiled 
finger or handkerchief on which there is some of this 
pus. If the eye is affected with gonorrhoeal pus, I 
want to say most emphatically that you must get 
the most expert medical advice possible, if you want 
to save the eyesight of the person whose eye or eyes 
are affected. It is a most serious matter, and re- 
quires immediate attention. At birth it has deprived 
many a child of sight, in whole or in part. Innocent 
little children have lost their sight wholly or par- 
tially by accidentally becoming infected by it in vari- 
ous ways while playing about ; grown folks, likewise, 
have paid the penalty so far as eyesight is concerned, 
for their own or other's " wild oats." And please 
bear in mind what I told you in the banning, that 
this is a most unnecessary and easily preventable 
disease. 

Let us see what follows the entrance of the gon- 
orrhoea! infection or germs into the vagina, disre- 
garding the way it got there. It immediately sets 
up an inflammation with the result that it passes 
through the lining membrane of the vagina and sets 
up a disturbance with a general reaction throughout 
the entire body. This reaction may appear as chills. 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 69 

fever, and languor, and may be severe enough to 
keep the affected person in bed for several days. 

The germs burrow their way into every gland 
that opens into the vagina, and there set up inflam- 
matory reactions. There are several pairs of these 
glands which may be so affected, and, believe me, I 
do not exaggerate when I tell you that gonorrhoeal 
invasion of these glands is one of the hardest parts 
of a gonorrhoeal infection to cure, if, indeed, it ever 
IS positively cured. As a rule, wherever this inflam- 
mation is set up there is pus formation, therefore 
gonorrhoeal leucorrhoea follows. 

In the glands abscesses may form which must 
be treated surgically, and even then the entire gon- 
orrhoeal infection is not overcome. If some of the 
germs effect an entrance into the urinary orifice, 
and in nine cases out of ten they do, this also 
becomes infected, and the inflammation travels up 
into the bladder and, in some cases by this direct 
route, may extend even into the kidneys. At any 
point in the tu^inary system, abscesses are liable to 
form, and stu-gical treatment must be resorted to 
for the evacuation of the pus, but it leaves the gon- 
orrhoeal infection still present. 

Abscesses of the urinary tract, no matter from 
what cause, are always extremely painful. When 
the urinary system is involved, the pain is very se- 
vere even if no abscesses be present, the passing of 



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70 SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 

the acid urine over the inflamed mucous membrane 
ofttimes causing the patient so much suffering that 
she faints. Acute suppression of urine may result 
from the patient's endeavoring to refrain from pass- 
ing it because of the suffering she knows is in store 
for her. Of course this only adds to the complica- 
tions of the situation. 

When the gonococci travel up from the vagina 
into the womb, they set up there a severe reaction, 
which may so affect the womb as to render it inca- 
pable of performing its physiological fimction at 
the time of possible pregnancy, with the result that 
the woman so affected is imable to bear children, a 
most unfortunate state of affairs for any normally 
constituted woman. Multiple abscesses may form 
in the womb, necessitating surgical treatment, even 
to the entire removal of the womb from the body. 
Need I state that with no womb the woman so 
afflicted can never know the joys of motherhood ? 

The infection may continue on its travels, and, 
recalling our lesson in anatomy, you know that the 
next place for it to go is into the tubes. With pus 
formation here, the only thing to do is practically 
to remove the tubes, hence the ability of a woman to 
bear children; because, with both tubes removed, 
the ripe ovum has no way of travelling from the 
ovary to the womb; therefore there can be no fer- 
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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 71 

formation necessitating the removal of the tubes; 
there may be only an intense inflammation in one or 
both tubes, with the oozing out of a sticky discharge 
which covers the mucous membrane lining the tubes. 
This may cause the opposite sides of the tube so 
affected to adhere to each other, closing up the open- 
ing or lumen, thereby rendering the passage of an 
ovum impossible, and producing the same result as if 
the tube were missing. With either of these condi- 
tions in the tubes, there is much pain and suffering 
for the patient. 

Should the infection find its way into the ovaries, 
it may, in getting there, set up an inflammation of a 
most serious kind that you have heard spoken of as 
peritonitis, which is an inflammation of the mem- 
brane in which practically all of the organs of the 
abdomen are enveloped. I leave you to imagine the 
possibilities that may result from such a state of 
affairs. 

If abscesses follow gonorrhoeal infection of the 
ovaries, surgical treatment will be necessary. If 
there are no ovaries there can be no ova, and with- 
out ova to be fertilized there can be no children. 
The removal of the ovaries also disturbs the men- 
strual periods — in fact, if the entire two ovaries are 
removed, usually causes them to cease altogether; 
adds greatly to the mental and physical suffering 
and the general misery of the woman; and, because 
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72 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

makes quite an invalid of her for some time, and 
perhaps for life. 

In some of these cases, permanent insanity is 
the outcome of the trouble. In others, the damage 
from the infection is so great as to necessitate the 
removal of all the reproductive organs of the 
woman, meaning, of course, her practical unsex- 
ing, — 2l most undesirable state of affairs. Even 
though gonorrhoeal infection of the ovaries does 
not run so severe a course as I have outlined, it will 
do great damage and cause most intense suffering. 

Again, supposing that the infection nms a milder 
course, and that the woman becomes a chronic suf- 
ferer from gonorrhoea ; after marriage she becomes 
pregnant, and during the delivery of the child some 
of the gonorrhoeal pus in the vagina of the mother 
gets into the eyes of the child. It means destruction 
of the child's eyesight, another blind baby, unless 
preventive measures are immediately instituted. 

A careful, up-to-date doctor takes no chances in 
any case; but, realizing the shameful prevalence of 
gonorrhoeal disease, takes preventive measures with 
every child he helps into the world, whether he 
thinks the mother is a carrier of gonorrhoea or not. 
Whenever he delivers a child he drops into the eyes 
a few drops of silver nitrate solution, and thereby 
kills any infection which might 'be in the child's 
eyes, no matter what the source. As future mothers 



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SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 73 

/ . / 

I advise you to remember this fact, and when the 

time comes for you to receive God's blessing in the 
shape of a darling little baby, to recall this partic- 
ular bit of advice and remind your medical attend- 
ant, whether midwife or doctor, that this should be 
done, and insist upon its being done immediately. 
If you feel that you cannot absolutely trust your 
attendant to do it at once, have it done in your 
presence. 

You do not want to have a blind baby — ^to blast 
a helpless, innocent little being's life at the very 
beginning of its existence. You do not want to read 
in a pair of sightless eyes the reproachful and mad- 
dening message, " I was blinded through my father's 
immorality, and my mother's indifference or care- 
lessness." You want a bright, happy, laughing baby, 
one that can see and rejoice in God's daylight; not 
a baby condemned to eternal night, with its never- 
ceasing darkness. These few drops of silver nitrate 
solution will spare any baby from this affliction, even 
though the mother has been so unfortunate as to 
have been contaminated with gonorrhoeal infection, 
and may still be a victim of it, in its chronic form. 

If the baby happens to be a girl, the gonorrhoeal 
infection of the mother is liable to get into the child's 
vagina during the time of birth, and cause disease and 
pain, besides making the child a source of danger to 



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74 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

every other child about her, to say nothing of the 
fact that she may infect her own eyes with the pus. 

You see, therefore, that with merely this dis- 
ease to consider, a pure life is advisable for both 
sexes. When we take up the other of these detest- 
able diseases you will, I am sure, agree with me 
that morality is positively beneficial to the human 
race, and wonder how any one can fail to realize it. 

How can you protect yourselves from gonor- 
rhoea! infection ? First, by not indulging in illegiti- 
mate sexual relations, for a man who might think 
twice before taking the chances of infecting his wife 
will not worry should he commimicate any disease 
to a woman who is willing to have illicit sexual 
relations with him. Second, by refraining from 
masturbation, and from having the genital parts 
handled in any manner, by anybody, not even your- 
selves, except for purposes of cleanliness. Third, 
by never using towels that have been used by any- 
body else; especially dangerous are the large roller- 
towels in public places. They really ought to be 
forbidden by law, for they are the means of spread- 
ing^ many diseases. Fourth, by cleaning a toilet seat 
as thoroughly as possible before using it, and, even 
after cleaning it, avoid, so far as possible, having the 
genital parts touch it. This refers to the toilet seat in 
your own house as well as in others, for, unfor- 
tunately, any member of your family affected with 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 75 

this disease may be just as careless of the rights of, 
and dangers to, others as outsiders. Some d^y the 
toilet seat in the shape of an inverted U will be 
adopted everywhere in place of the present oval- 
shaped one, and then toilet seats will not be quite 
such dangerous disease carriers as they are now. 

Fifth, by insisting before marriage that your 
prospective husband have himself thoroughly ex- 
amined by a good physician to be sure that he is free 
from such disease. If a man truly loves a girl he 
cannot object to being asked to have such an exami- 
nation made, especially if, up to that time, he has 
indulged in sexual relations with anybody and every- 
body. He certainly should want to take no chances, 
and surely would not desire to ruin your health and 
happiness when you become his wife, nor to run the 
chances of having his offspring blinded at the time 
of birth. 

Most men, through ignorance of what is good 
for them and lack of knowledge of the terrible 
chances they are taking, not only with their own 
health, but with that of their future wives and chil- 
dren, do indulge in the sexual relation before mar- 
riage. This is owing to the fact that, at present, we 
have that queer double standard of morals which 
makes immorality in the woman a mo^t unpardon- 
able sin, whereas the same action in the man is a 
pleasurable necessity to his health. 



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Of course this latter statement about the sexual 
relation being necessary to the health of a man is 
nothing but a lie, a most vicious lie without a grain 
of truth in it 

There is absolutely no reason or excuse for either 
man or woman indulging in illegitimate sexual re- 
lations on the groimd of health or otherwise. When 
so indulged in, it is either to satisfy animal desire 
or for some pay, which may be money or other rec- 
ompense. I regret to say that it is usually the 
woman who is guilty of the almost imspeakable 
shame of offering herself to men for sexual indul- 
gence as an ordinary commercial transaction — in 
other words, for personal gain. It is hard to imagine 
how a woman can sink so low, be so utterly lacking 
in self-respect as to make the sacred sexual relation 
a thing of barter or every-day business. One can 
imagine a foolish girl being carried away by the 
glib tongue of a man for whom she has some affec- 
tion, and believing the false promises he is making 
her to gain his end, but deliberately to make her 
sexual organs a means of gaining a livelihood, is to 
drop in the social scale about as low as any one can 
possibly get. Dr. Lyman Abbott recently expressed 
his views in the New York Times as follows : 

Some girls are seduced, betrayed, and abandoned; some 
are captured by wiles or by force and enslaved; some are 
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earning a livelihood by honest industry ; some are enticed into 
it by their love of pleasure and of display and by the false 
notion that it is an easy way of earning money; some drop 
into it through ignorance and incompetent or vicious home 
training, and a great many through inherent mental defec- 
tiveness. 

Just a word to the girl who may be easily influ- 
enced by the lies of the man who pretends to love her 
but whose real object is to ruin her body and soul, 
and who, having once degraded her, will attempt to 
keep her in degradation for his own benefit How 
can I say emphatically enough to this girl that no man 
in his senses and having proper respect, not to men- 
tion true love, for a girl, would ever make such a 
base proposition to her. If he really loved her he 
would not want her to sacrifice her good name and 
life for him. Even if he meant all the promises he 
might make her at this time, he knows that, having 
accomplished her ruin, he would not hold her in the 
same esteem as before, just because she lowered 
herself for him. He is suspicious of her, and thinks 
that if she became a " fallen " woman for him, others 
would have the same influence over her. Life is 
uncertain, and sudden death always a possibility to 
the most healthy of us. Even if a man were honest 
in his intentions to marry a girl under these circum- 
stances, how would the girl fare in case of his sudden 
death? Her good name gone, she would find it 



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78 SEX TALKS TO GIELS 

difficult to re-establish herself in the eyes of the 
public 

Moreover, if a girl who is silly enough to trust 
a man to this extent could hear him talking openly 
about his relations with her, she would soon realize 
how foolish she was to believe him. There is never 
any excuse for such relations taking place before 
marriage, and never any good reason why a marriage 
ceremony should not be performed. Qh L I know 
the man in the case will offeiMnany excuses, but if 
he loves you well enough to desire to act as a hus- 
band toward you, and you love him enough to act 
as a wife toward him, no excuse can stand in the 
way of a legal marriageTmTact, there is none. 
Money affairs or other alleged reasons are noTfeal ^ 

ones. If the man thinks, or if you think, they are t i yf * 
real obstacles to an honorable marriage, then they C r ^ 
are most excellent reasons for not indulging in ille-y \f^\^ • 
gitimate relations. ^^ ' 

Every girl can do much toward bringing about 
the end of immorality : first, by being pure and above 
reproach herself, and, second, by insisting that those 
of the opposite sex who desire to be received by her 
as friends be the same. Give them their choice. 
They must either give up their immoral women as- 
sociates or hold to them entirely, so far as you are 
concerned. Be the champions of your " fallen " 
sisters, and refuse to countenance their further deg- 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 79 

radation by those who would call themselves your 
friends. Do not sit by and be a passive accomplice 
in the cheapening of womanhood, and the most 
ttj^fii all human relations. 
'5*Third, you can endeavor to bring back to the 
straight and happy path of virtue those girls who, 
you know, have strayed Jtrgra^j^. It is never too 
late for a girl to return to a ^ood life, and it is your 
duty to help her to the utmost of your ability. If 
each one of you would " rescue just one brand from 
the burning," my little instructive talks to you would 
be more than amply paid for. Remember the words 
of the old hymn, "While the lamp holds out to 
burn, the vilest sinner may return." 

If you endeavor to do this good for some poor 
unfortunate who has erred, somewhere will be ris- 
ing earnest prayers of thankfulness from some sor- 
rowing family, and the Recording Angel above will 
certainly enter your deed in His book. Personally, 
I know that I would do everything in my power to 
help a repentant girl back to a pure life, and I sin- 
cerely hope that each and every one of you would 
do the same. It will be to the advantage of every 
one of you to further the cause of social purity in 
every way that you can. At present the wedding 
night means, for too many women, loss of health 
and happiness, and probably serious surgical opera- 
tions in the future, — ^a very sad harvest to reap 



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80 SEX TALKS TO GIELS 

from what should be the happiest time in their lives. 

The matter of gonorrhoeal infection cannot be 
passed over lightly. The fact that many a husband 
who wrongs his wife by transmitting to her a gon- 
orrhoeal infection does so innocently does not make 
her physical suffering any less. The fact that he 
may think himself cured of the disease acquired be- 
fore marriage does not alter the case. I am, and 
always have been, in favor of a law requiring every 
applicant for a marriage license, both man and 
woman, to present from a reputable physician a 
medical certificate of at least good sexual health. 
Some states already have such laws, and strictly 
enforce them. Every girl can and should be 
such a law unto herself. You are no coward, nor 
any the less a devoted lover, because you seek to 
conserve and protect your own health and happi- 
ness, and that of your future children. Rather you 
are a sensible girl, seeking to be a good wife and 
mother, and having the best interests of your pro- 
posed husband at heart. He will not want an in- 
valid for a wife, even though she be one of his own 
making, so better a thorough understanding before 
the wedding ceremony than a life of unhappiness for 
both afterwards, besides pain and suffering for the 
wife. 

Remember, too, that the immoral girl suffers all 
these unpleasant and painful things as well as the 



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wife ; only the former is less liable to escape them, 
for no man stops to consider his condition when he 
is going to consort with an impure woman. Again, 
lack of care of herself, which a life of immorality 
precludes, also makes suffering more certain for the 
girls whose morals are loose; for without care things 
go from bad to worse and finally reach the point of 
maximum intensity in physical suffering, to which 
are added the pangs of mental anguish, caused by 
ever-present remorse. You know there are times 
when one can stifle the " pricks " of conscience, but 
when in pain mental resistance is usually weak. 

If you work for social purity in both word and 
deed, you are going to add to everybody's happiness, 
including your own. God did not make the act of 
creating our race one to be debased by lowering it 
to a popular form of dissipation or of barter. 
Neither did He intend those of you to whom He 
gave the right of motherhood to sell to men the priv- 
ilege of making this act a mere animal pastime. As 
future mothers of sons and daughters, you should 
be deeply interested in social purity, for none of 
you wishes to think of a future son as being a de- 
spoiler of your sex when he comes to manhood, or 
of a future daughter as being willing to offer her- 
self for money for the sexual gratification of men. 
Neither do you want to be an unnecessary martyr 
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82 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

to our present false and debasing social code, when 
a little common-sense on your part will serve to pro- 
tect your health and that of any future offspring. 

Just think it over carefully, and you will certainly 
be a most earnest worker in the cause of social 
purity. Remember there can be no sexual vice with- 
out both sexes participating. It is no use to accuse 
one or the other of being to blame; it takes two to 
make a bargain. Work in order that, so far as you 
can prevent it, no member of your sex that you can 
advise or control will be a disgrace to womanhood. 
Constitute yourself your sister's keeper, and let the 
account of your stewardship be a creditable one. 
I need hardly say that the influence of a good ex- 
ample greatly assists your verbal efforts. 

Before closing this talk I want to add to the list 
of possible gonorrhceal carriers, contaminated bed- 
ding, bathing suits, swimming pools, and bath-tubs. 
Never sleep in a bed used by others unless the bed- 
ding has been changed. Never use a bathing suit 
used by another, unless you know it to have been 
washed and boiled. In most indoor swimming pools 
the water is not changed frequently enough, and in 
many of them nude bathing is allowed, hence the 
water is readily contaminated by pus discharges. 
All bath-tubs should be thoroughly scrubbed before 
using. 



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REVIEW 

I. What are the effects of venereal diseases, and how may 

they be averted? 
II. What is gonorrhcEa and what does it produce ? 

III. How is it usually transmitted? Name other means. 

IV. What is the usual place of infection in the female, and 

where else may it be found? 
V. Explain how it affects the vagina. 

VI. How does it affect the urinary system ? Explain why. 

VII. What is meant by "unsexing" the patient, and state 

fully why this might be necessary. 
VIII. What measures should always be taken to safeguard the 
eyesight of a new-born babe? 
IX. Name at least five ways in which you may protect your- 
self against this infection. 
X. In what way can you help to advance the cause of 
social purity? 



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Just a few words of recapitulation regarding 
gonorrhoea! infection before I pass to the second 
of these venereal diseases, viz., syphilis. 

I told you that gonorrhoeal infection sometimes 
sets up a general reaction, but I neglected to state 
that when the germs get into the blood and are cir- 
culating throughout the body masses of them some- 
times collect in one or more of the joints of the 
body, and there set up an inflammation somewhat 
like a rheumatic condition, but much more danger- 
ous and painful. We call this inflammation gon- 
orrhoeal arthritis. 

Besides being a disease which causes most ex- 
cruciating pain for a long period, a pain which makes 
that of ordinary rheumatism seem a mere trifle, this 
inflammation produced in the joints is a most de- 
structive one, which produces in the construction of 
the joint tissues that which may destroy them for- 
eVer. Do you understand fully what I mean ? When 
this disease — gonorrhoeal arthritis — ^affects a joint, 
the patient is liable to be crippled, so far as that joint 
is concerned. The disease may attack several joints, 
and finally destroy them. When it does not entirely 
destroy the joint, it may leave it partially disabled ; 
84 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 85 

in either event it is rather a serious matter, and is 
certainly a strong additional argument for social 
purity in both sexes. 

As the germs of gonorrhoea may effect entrance 
into your system whether through immorality on 
your part or the part of another, I again repeat 
what I have said so many times, avoid sexual famil- 
iarity of any kind. Insist upon your prospective 
husband undergoing a thorough physical examina- 
tion to ascertain whether he is sexually healthy be- 
fore he becomes your husband, and entitled to sexual 
relations with you. I cannot too strongly empha- 
size this point, and you cannot be too particular in 
carrying out this advice. You owe it to yourselves 
and to posterity. 

We shall now pass to the discussion of a disease 
that is, perhaps, the most loathsome of all the dis- 
eases that human flesh is heir to, and to be afflicted 
with which, if it becomes known to those with whom 
one comes in contact, makes the person so diseased 
a most unwelcome guest anywhere. It is a disease 
that causes both mental and physical suffering, and 
is not infrequently a cause of suicide. It has three 
stages, each very troublesome and painful. Its com- 
plications and sequelae, or results, are to be dreaded. 
Its victims help materially to fill the asylums for the 
insane and feeble-minded. Its poisons are strong 
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86 SEX TALKS TO GIBJLS 

has not already destroyed the growing human seed- 
ling; they are even strong enough to prevent preg- 
nancy by destroying the viability of either the male 
or the female contribution to reproduction, or both. 
Even when the child is so unfortunate as to be born 
alive, it is bom with the disease, and merely comes 
into an inheritance of pain, suffering, and disgrace ; 
possibly also feeble-mindedness, or worse. It goes 
through life with the taint of syphilis attached to it, 
and is always in dread of the disease breaking out in 
him or her, although medical treatment for it may 
have been taken. 

Even with the most thorough treatment, it is a 
difficult disease to eradicate permanently, and it cer- 
tainly well illustrates the biblical quotation, " And the 
sins of the fathers shall be visited upon the children, 
even unto the third and fourth generation." Like 
gonorrhoea, it may attack the innocent as well as the 
guilty, as many learn to their cost. Doctors and 
nurses have been known, all too frequently, to con- 
tract it in caring for their patients, and these martyrs 
to their profession are punished in the same severe 
way by this " black plague " as those who contract 
it in the pursuit of illicit sexual relations or other- 
wise. 

Moreover, it is a disease for which* there is no 
excuse at all Morality would stamp it out for all 
time, and without syphilis in the world many other 



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diseases would find less favorable conditions for at- 
tacks on the human race. A strong, healthy human 
body has the power to resist the germs of many of 
our diseases, but none seem to have enough resist- 
ance to come into contact with the poisonous germs 
of either syphilis or gonorrhoea and not be infected. 

Is this not significant ? Does it not seem to point 
a moral ? It certainly should be a strong argument 
in favor of morality, even to an unreligious mind. 
To the religious mind no further words from me 
are necessary. If gonorrhoea is an evil thing, on 
hearing what is to follow you will agree with me 
that syphilis is worse, and that neither is desirable 
to harbor in your system. If, as has been said time 
and again by philosophers, there is no happiness 
without good health, once attacked by these diseases 
your chances of happiness are small. 

What is syphilis ? It is an acute infectious dis- 
ease, transmitted usually by personal contact in the 
course of the sexual relation, although it can be 
transmitted in many other ways, especially by kiss- 
ing. Barring the sexual way, perhaps this is the way 
in which it is most often given. It has recently been 
discovered that it is a germ disease — I use the word 
" germ " in a broad, general sense. The scientific 
name for this germ is " Spirochaeta pallida Schau- 
dinn." A hard name to remember, think you, but 
if you are ever so unfortunate as to harbor any of 



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88 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

this tribe in your body, the results will never be for- 
gotten by you or yours unto your dying day, for 
the disease, in its most virulent form, and with 
its ever-changing but continuous complications, is 
enough to make you regret that you were ever born. 

The virus, or poison, of syphilis may be got from 
any glass, cup, or other drinking vessel which has 
been used by a syphilitic person and not properly 
disinfected. Therefore, you see that more than the 
danger of tuberculosis lurks in the common drinking 
cup, whether it be at a water faucet, soda fountain, 
saloon, or elsewhere. The syphilitic virus may be 
conveyed by any other article handled by a person 
afflicted with the disease provided that any of the 
syphilitic discharges have gotten on these articles. 
You can, therefore, see that a syphilitic woman is 
something of a menace to those about her, and when 
the true state of affairs becomes known the diseased 
person finds to her discomfort and embarrassment 
that everybody is inclined to keep at a safe distance 
from her. Wherever she goes the attitude, " I pre- 
fer your room to your company," is noticeable, and 
the feeling that she is " of the accursed," and there- 
fore to be shunned, is humiliating, and to some 
almost maddening. 

The worst thing about these diseased people is 
the fact that many of them are absolutely indifferent 
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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 89 

aloof from them, they seem to harbor a revengeful 
spirit, and do not seem to care whether or not they 
infect others — ^not a commendable spirit, and one 
fraught with real danger, so far as the general public 
is concerned. To prove to you that I do not say these 
things and utter so many warnings unnecessarily, I 
might mention an incident brought to my attention 
a little while ago. 

A certain person was warned that he had syphi- 
litic ulcers in the mouth. His physician, being most 
conscientious, took the time and trouble to explain to 
this man that he was a menace to others. The man 
professed to be shocked and much impressed by 
what was told him, and promised very faithfully to 
protect others from any possible contagion. Did 
he do it ? Judge for yourselves when I tell you that, 
less than two hours later, he was drinking at a public 
fountain from a glass that was to be used by others. 

Perhaps the time is not far distant when health 
boards will deal with these venereal diseases as they 
deserve to be dealt with ; but, until that time comes, 
we must do what we can to protect ourselves. 

Syphilis usually takes from about two to three 
weeks to develop, when a single sore makes its ap- 
pearance at the place where the syphilitic poison 
entered the body. It is a peculiar feature of this 
disease that one can always tell where the infection 
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90 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

It is also a reliable indication as to the manner in 
which the disease was contracted. Do you realize 
that, when infected by a disease which, although fully 
present, may not manifest itself for some fourteen 
to twenty-one days and perhaps even longer, an im- 
moral individual, travelling from person to person, 
can, even unintentionally, spread this disease before 
he or she realizes its presence in the system? 

After the appearance of this sore, there are no 
further developments until forty to fifty days later, 
when constitutional symptoms appear. Again you 
see how easily the disease may be spread if, by 
chance, the patient disregards the appearance of the 
sore, or if, on going to the doctor, the sore is not 
properly diagnosticated. You will understand the 
preceding statement when I tell you that there is 
a venereal lesion caused by an entirely different 
germ and that is comparatively harmless, which 
somewhat resembles the initial lesion or sore of 
syphilis, and also that this initial sore may be any 
one of SIX different varieties. 

The rash of the disease usually first appears at 
fVjp navpl (i;\]f- litt le htitton-like depression at abo ut 
th ejniddle of the surface of the abdomen ) on about 
the sixtieth or seventieth day and spreads rapidly 
over the body, the back of the legs, and the 
front of the arms — in other words, the flexor surfaces 
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On fading, the eruption usually leaves brownish, red, 
or copper-colored spots. There are several different 
types of syphilitic rashes which may appear in this 
disease, so here again it is easy in the early stages to 
make a mistake in diagnosis, and thereby allow the 
disease to be spread. Dangerous mistakes, think 
you, and I fully agree with you. 

In the course of this disease practically no part 
of the body is exempt from its ravages. It attacks 
or affects the hair of the head as the uppermost, 
and the soles of the feet as the lowermost point, and 
all of the body between these points. It attacks not 
only the hair of the scalp, but the hair in all parts of 
the body. Through ulceration of the lids it may 
even attack the eyelashes. The hair may fall out 
in spots or entirely, or there may be a general thin- 
ning of it. The nails of both fingers and toes may 
be attacked, the former more often than the latter, 
and the resulting disfigured nails are a " speaking " 
advertisement to those about you of what disease 
you carry. When the disease attacks the nails the 
skin surrounding them may also become affected. 

As I told you in a previous talk, the lining skin 
or membrane of any of the internal cavities of the 
body, such as the mouth, vagina, stomach, etc., is 
known as a mucous membrane. These membranes 
are very apt to be attacked by the disease with re- 
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92 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

formation. The discharge from such ulcers or ab- 
scesses is very infectious and, therefore, most dan- 
gerous. Think of the extent of these mucous mem- 
branes, and you can easily realize what damage can 
be caused by such ulcerations on these surfaces alone. 

The syphilitic lesions of the tongue have a 
marked tendency to degenerate into cancerous 
growths. Often necrosis of the bony, or hard 
palate and upper jawbones takes place in the course 
of the disease. As the bone rots away, the teeth 
become loosened and fall out, and syphilitic ulcers or 
abscesses appear on the soft palate. The pharynx, 
oesophagus, stomach, intestines, and rectum may be 
the seat of ulceration, and these ulcerations may 
become aggravated and rupture, in the case of the 
oesophagus, probably causing instant death by per- 
mitting food to enter and become lodged in the wind- 
pipe or lungs ; in the case of the stomach or intestines 
causing a peritonitis with perhaps fatal results, and 
likewise in the case of the rectum. 

On the other hand, if these conditions do not 
grow worse but yield to treatment, in the healing they 
are liable to " draw in," as one might say, and cause 
a contracture or stricture somewhere in the gastro- 
intestinal tract. The most frequent site for such a 
thing to happen, however, is in the rectum. I need 
hardly take time to explain to you how unpleasant 
and serious such an occurrence is — a serious impedi- 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 93 

ment to the proper action of the bowel, and one not 
without danger to life, to say nothing of good health. 

The liver, sometimes called the chemical labora- 
tory and fuel storehouse of the body, therefore a 
most important organ which should be in the best of 
condition if we are to enjoy good health, is seem- 
ingly most susceptible to the poison of this vile 
disease, and is more frequently affected by syphilis 
than any of the abdominal organs. The outcome 
here may be most serious for the patient, as result- 
ant abscesses destroy much of the liver tissue and 
thereby lessen its efficiency. 

I wish time permitted me to detail how the liver 
is concerned in the various functions of the body, 
so as to make you realize from facts, and not merely 
from my statements, how serious a matter destruc- 
tion of the liver tissue is. 

But why go on in this strain ? You are not going 
to be doctors, so more detail might be an over-suffi- 
ciency. Suffice it to say, as I have already told you, 
that every organ or part of the entire body is vul- 
nerable to, and often is attacked by, this vile poison 
with serious results. Even the blood-vessels them- 
selves are not exempt, but from merely being the 
carriers by which the poison travels through the 
body in the blood stream, the walls of the vessels 
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94 SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 

down, causing hemorrhage, following which may 
come severe headaches, delirium, convulsions, loss 
of memory as regards everybody and everything, 
epilepsy, paralysis, and muscular spasms. Syphilis 
is one of the most frequent causes of apoplexy. 

When this disease attacks the spine and brain 
the result may be insanity, in many cases preceded 
by abscesses, locomotor ataxia, paralysis with its 
utter helplessness, epilepsy, etc., or any or all of the 
foregoing, with death mercifully intervening before 
the stage of insanity is reached. 

Syphilis is a strong argument for social purity 
in both sexes, and positively no one who has ever 
had it should dream of getting married until he has 
had from two to two and a half years of the most 
thorough treatment, and has been declared free from 
it by our present system or mode of testing the blood. 
This is not an infallible test because of the human 
element in it, but it is far better than guessing. No 
physician can, however, guarantee a complete cure 
with no possibility of recurrence. Oftentimes years 
pass, and the patient rejoices that everything has 
gone so well; when, in the midst of the rejoicing, 
the " black plague *' comes to life again, and makes 
the victim miserable. Nature does punish, and se- 
verely, offenders against her rules of health. 

Personally, I don't believe that I would ever 
marry any one who had ever had syphilis ; but, then. 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 95 

some of us are braver than others. If I were not 
afraid of infection for myself, I should be for the 
fruit of the union, and the thought that I was in 
part responsible for bringing a baby into the world 
to a life of misery would be a life-time reproach to 
me — a reproach that would always be present with 
me, no matter where I was or what I was doing. 

If you have ever seen a little sufferer from this 
disease, you will realize more clearly the absolute 
truth of my statement. They suffer much pain from 
the disease itself, and from complications and se- 
quelae induced by the presence of the disease in the 
system. If they survive, one is really never sure 
whether the disease has been thoroughly eradicated 
or is going to return at a later date. Sometimes the 
disease does not appear in infancy, but this does not 
mean that the guilty parent may feel certain it has 
not been transmitted, for this feeling of security 
would not be justified. 

The child, one or both of whose parents are syph- 
ilitic, may show its first symptoms in later childhood 
or at the age of puberty. This, as you can imag- 
ine, is pleasant neither for the parents nor the child, 
and the older the child the greater the shame felt at 
being a sufferer from this disease of immorality. 

I asked you before if any of you had ever seen 
a child stricken with this disease. It is about all that 
a normal baby should not be. Your ideal and mind- 



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96 SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 

picture of a baby is of a healthy, bright, rosy- 
cheeked, laughing little tot whose every movement 
and gesture are a pleasure and joy to its parents. 
When you see a baby of this kind you can hardly 
resist the temptation to take it into your arms and 
caress it. You feel as if you must hug and kiss it, 
and you really envy the parents their possession of 
it. Even when it cries for some reason or other, the 
cry is a good, vigorous one with life in it, and while 
perhaps annoying to some, it is still bearable to 
listen to. 

Poor little syphilitic baby! No one loves you 
nor wants to hug and kisS you except, perhaps, the 
poor mother who had the misfortune to bring you 
into the world. To her you are dear and precious, 
although I sometimes wonder if, when she sees 
your terrible sufferings she does not sometimes pray 
that death may relieve them. It is because she loves 
you that she cannot bear to see you suffer. You 
are no one's ideal and mind-picture of a baby. You 
are just the opposite of what everybody thinks a 
baby ought to be. You are repulsive to them, and 
when they know the reason for your suffering and 
appearance, they cannot be blamed if they shun you 
and consider you a menace to others, a pest to be 
avoided, even though their actions bring hours of 
tears and desolation to your poor unhappy mother. 

Of course it is unfair to you because you were 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 99 

marriage that might sully your good name, and will 
also see that your future husband, if not a total ab- 
stainer from sexual relations before he became ac- 
quainted with you, will at once become such, and 
will submit to a proper physical examination as to 
sexual health and get an affirmative certificate before 
you marry him ? 

Don't let these talks make merely a temporary 
impression upon you, but think carefully of every- 
thing I have said to you to date, as I shall also ask 
you to think carefully of everything I am going to 
tell you as we travel along in our sex talks. I have 
your interests at heart, and want " my girls " to 
profit now, and in the future, by what I am telling 
them. Many will tell you, for reasons of their own, 
things different from what I say ; they will have *' an 
axe to grind," whereas I have not. Oh, yes ! I for- 
got ; I have an axe to grind ! I intend that you and 
the children you will be mothers of in the future 
shall be happy and healthy, so far as it lies in my 
power to control these things. 

Don't sacrifice your own health and that of your 
future little ones to the selfishness of any man. In- 
sist on total abstinence in those whom you know, 
just as soon as you become acquainted. Let your- 
selves be known as girls whose morals are above re- 
proach, and who desire only the company of those 
whose standards are the same. Don't lower your 



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100 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

standards which you know to be proper for the sake 
of having about you a number of the opposite sex or 
of being the recipients of attentions from them. The 
real man will always recognize and appreciate the 
right sort of girl, and the other kinds of men are not 
worth your time. Don't sell your birthright for " a 
mess of pottage " which can bring only shame, suf- 
fering, and disgrace to you and yours in the end. 

You have a right to healthy, happy, and honor- 
able wifehood and motherhood, and do not be con- 
tent with anything else. It is the highest goal that 
a woman can reach. If she is a success in these 
capacities, she is, indeed, a success in life. 

This is all that I am going to say to you regard- 
ing the venereal diseases and their effects upon you 
and your offspring. I think I have said enough to 
show you how undesirable they are, and how dan- 
gerous to all concerned ; more would, therefore, be 
superfluous. But this will give you plenty of food 
for deep, earnest thought if you are inclined that 
way. Even the most frivolous among you must be 
impressed with the fact that, if for no other reason 
than the freedom from such wretched ill-health as 
impurity brings in its train, morality pays. 

REVIEW 

I. How does gonorrhoea affect the joints, and state the re- 
sults of such infection. 
11. Mention some of the effects of the poison of syphilis. 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 101 

III. What would entirely stamp out this disease? 

IV. What is syphilis, and how is it most frequently trans- 

mitted? 
V. Give other means of transmission. 
VI. How does the disease first manifest itself and how may 

it be even unintentionally spread? 
VII. Describe progress of the disease and some of its effects. 
VIII. Explain in detail its significance' as regards marriage. 
IX. How may you protect yourselves and babies? 
X. How can you influence the morality of men? 



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VI 

In this talk we shall discuss various things 
which, if corrected, would I believe lead to fewer 
girls going astray in an immoral way, and to less 
immorality. Some of these things might be put 
mider the head of modesty, or shall I say the lack 
of modesty? Others might be classified under good 
breeding, or, perhaps, the lack of it. 

First, I want to emphasize that I am a firm be- 
liever in the mingling of both sexes from infancy 
to old age. I believe that a boy who is constantly 
in the company of nice, refined girls of his 
own age is better off in many ways for this 
association. Having some favorite of the op- 
posite sex whose good opinion he values very much 
prevents him from acquiring agreat many habits 
he is better off without. \The influence of 
"his girl*' makes itself felt, and, being a well- 
brought-up little maiden, she will not accept the 
boyish affection of a lad who uses bad language, be 
the bad language either profanity or obscene words. 
She also objects to the smoking of cigarettes, the 
drinking of liquor, and to other bad conduct in 
general. Even should his inclinations nm in these 
directions, to please her our little lad eschews all 
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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS lOS 

these things and endeavors to conduct himself, in 
her presence, at least, like a little gentlema^ 

From behaving in this way in " her " presence, 
he is likely to contract the habit of conducting him- 
self so at all times. Likewise, since he is in good 
company, sexual desire is not aroused in a harmful 
way by hearing lewd stories, so-called jokes in re- 
gard to the sexual act, nor from learning the ex- 
periences of other, and, probably older boys who 
have indulged in illegal sexual relations and who 
would, perhaps, like to persuade another to sin in 
this way. 

To sum up, he becomes a moral, manly boy, in- 
stead of more or less of a rough, eager and anxious 
to be different in every way from the crowd. If he 
continues under such good influences, he emerges 
from youth a real young man, not a despoiler of 
the virtue of a pure girl, nor does he take any part 
in the further degradation of an already unfortunate 
woman. In other words, he abstains from sexual 
relations. At manhood he is a man of moral force 
and character, and a citizen of whom his community 
is proud. He is the sort of man whom a girl can 
safely love and marry. He is of the kind to make a 
good husband and father, because he has no venereal 
taint in him with which to poison his wife and chil- 
dren or his own good nature, and most likely he 
will be f omid to be a real man in all other respects. 



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104 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

Now what does the girl gain by being brought up, 
as it were, in the company of the opposite sex ? She, 
also, like the boy, most likely knows one of the 
opposite sex who appeals to her just a little bit more, 
at least, than the other boys she knows, and her 
desire to win his approval stirs her to greater efforts 
to improve herself, and to be a nice, refined, lady- 
like little girl. The average boy is a very plain- 
spoken and harsh critic, and when that little girl 
sets out to please him she undertakes a hard task. 
His thoughts are usually clean and pure, and any- 
thing that she does which is not right, according to 
his boyish ideas of what is right and wrong, meets 
his outspoken disapproval in emphatic form. He 
wants " his girl " to be an example to all the others 
in neatness, cleanliness of tongue and action, and 
good breeding. No matter what he may be, he wants 
her to be beyond reproach in every way. Praise of 
her, sung by others to him or in his hearing, is the 
sweetest music in the world to his ears, whereas the 
reverse is liable to lessen his own opinion of his 
" lady-love/' 

The girl naturally endeavors to live up to 
this good opinion, at least in "his" presence, 
and, as in the case of the boy we spoke of, 
"practice makes perfect." Again, this same girl 
becomes aware of her influence over this particular 
boy, and this awakens in the heart of the right sort 



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SEX TALBB TO GIRLS 105 

of girl a desire to wield only an influence which will 
be for his betterment. It develops in her the normal 
instinct to be a comrade to the male, watching over 
him and guiding his footsteps toward the goal of 
highest achievement. 

If she grows up in such an atmosphere of thought 
and desire, she is going to be a real woman, standing 
for everything that is good and worth while. 

Her influence, of course, will be on the side of 
good morals, and at least one boy will be kept in the 
path of rectitude through her efforts; probably more 
than one, for he also will become a force in the work 
of changing our present vicious double standard of 
morals into a single standard for both sexes — ^that 
of social purity. 

You can all be such women if you will. The 
question is, do you want to be, and, wanting to be, 
are you willing to work to gain such an enviable 
position? Is it worth while? It most certainly is. 
You will be promoting your own health and happi- 
ness, the health and happiness of the man whom 
you have led to see the great wrong in the present 
contemptible double standard of morals, and the 
health and happiness of your sex in general. Some 
of these you will, no doubt, have saved from the 
lowest stages of degradation. So, if again you are 
even tempted to doubt whether it is worth while, just 
recall very carefully what I have said. 



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In what other ways can you assist a young man 
to live a good life? In what other ways can you 
exemplify piu-ity in your actions? The answer to 
these questions is a simple one. Be modest. Many 
of you will immediately say, " Siu-ely I do not need 
such advice. I am modest." Well, perhaps you are, 
and perhaps you are not. Let me tell you of some 
things which I call immodest, and see if you are 
guilty of any of them. 

Indiscriminate kissing is certainly immodest. 
For a girl to allow herself to be kissed by any one 
and every one is not a good thing. " Familiarity 
breeds contempt " is an old saying, and a true one. 
Don't cheapen yourselves, and make your caresses 
worthless. If a young man finds you not averse to 
kissing, he may get the idea that your morals are 
loose or can be easily corrupted, and he may deter- 
mine to ascertain whether he is right or wrong. 
Kissing, particularly when of a violent, passionate 
type, usually arouses sexual desire, and if you lead 
a young man on by such actions he is liable to forget 
himself, perhaps even to the point of using force. 
Moreover, this kind of kissing is liable also to arouse 
yoiu- sexual passions and to put you in a state of 
mind wherein your usual clear judgment and sense 
of right and wrong are blunted, and you may be 
deeply sorry afterwards for what you have been a 
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SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 107 

a first experience of the cost, but the blot is there, 
and the repentance is a long and a dreary one. 

Such a state as I have just described has cost 
many a girl her womanly honor, and has placed her 
in the ranks of those who earn their living by barter 
of their sexual organs. These, of coiu"se, are the 
girls who, having made the first misstep, lacked the 
strength of mind to face the world and show that 
they were but foolish, not bad, and had trusted a 
man too much — it is so easy to drop down into the 
slime, rather than to climb up against the sneers of 
those who are mean and narrow-minded. 

The danger of kissing and its bad consequences 
are distinctly increased by being " in a couple in- 
stead of in a crowd." I could say much about this 
subject alone, but I think that just these few words 
will convey to your minds exactly what I mean. I 
take occasion to say right here that even engaged 
couples should avoid too much kissing, because even 
for them it is fraught with danger. They have their 
thoughts of future happiness to make them still more 
reckless under aroused sexual desire, and even in 
engaged couples immorality can be called by no other 
name, and is just as inexcusable or maybe more so 
than in others. 

Aside from their relatives, I think g^rls are best 
off unkissed, so far as the opposite sex goes, and un- 
kissed on the mouth, so far as their own sex is con- 



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108 SEX TALKS TO GIELS 

cerned. Kissing is a first-rate way of spreading 
other diseases beside those we have discussed in a 
previous talk. 

After what I have already said about permitting 
familiarities upon yoiu* person by the opposite sex, 
or your own either, other than kissing, it seems 
almost superfluous to speak of such things again. 
Still, I will say a few words to remind you of the 
dangers. Embraces are suggestive of bodily con- 
tact, and suggestions of bodily contact produce 
thoughts of sexual contact, therefore avoid them. 
Yes, I know that in giving you this advice; 
I am telling you to refrain from participating 
in some of the newer dances that have lately 
been introduced into our midst from the lower 
grade dance halls of the immoral districts of various 
cities. You see at times our so-called society leaders, 
instead of trying to improve and reform those who 
have " fallen," give them an undeserved importance 
by aping the performances which these imfortimates 
use in catering to the animal passions, by which, 
when aroused, they hope to profit 

Do not permit any handling of yoiu" person im- 
necessarily, no matter where. If you stop uncon- 
scious familiarity in the beginning, you will not have 
intentional familiarity to stop later on. A girl must 
always be on her guard to see that, in no way, is she 
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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 109 

in the opposite sex. In this respect, she is the better 
balanced of the two sexes, and the one to suffer most 
when the moral law is broken. I know some girls 
seem to take a peculiar pleasure in seeing how far 
they can go in arousing sexual desire in a man, with- 
out any idea on their part of satisfying it. In fact, 
they consider themselves too decent to let such a 
thought enter into their scheme of action. They 
merely want to amuse themselves at the expense of 
the man who is being made to feel uncomfortable 
by their words and suggestive actions. When the 
man suggests anything improper to them, they nat- 
urally feel highly insulted, and accuse the one they 
have tormented of being anything but a gentleman ; 
whereas, as a matter of fact, the fault is theirs, and 
the lack of modesty and good breeding is chiefly 
theirs also. 

Do not tread on dangerous ground, and then be 
surprised if something unpleasant happens to you. 
Let your actions be always those of a lady, and you 
probably will find that no insults will be your portion. 

The question of how a girl dresses is also an 
important one. The male sex has always been 
trained to regard the female form as something 
sacred to be concealed from public view, and several 
years ago none but an immoral woman would wear 
anything that would, in any way, display her 
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110 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

Such things formed part of her stock in trade to 
attract the attention of men and to arouse in them 
animal desire, to be satisfied by sexual relations 
with the temptress, who of course collected money 
for gratifying the passion she had aroused. 

Formerly, we had no difficulty in recognizing 
fallen women on the street or elsewhere — ^they 
dressed in a way so totally different from that of the 
respectable women that we might almost have spoken 
truthfully of them as wearing a tmiform which 
advertised their despicable calling. 

To-day it is quite different Once more have 
some of oiu- women and girls lowered themselves in 
an effort to copy from the underworld of immoral- 
ity certain articles of dress. The result is, I regret 
to say, that if we were to judge the morals of every 
woman by the flashiness or the immodesty of her 
dress, many would be misjudged. 

I shall not argue with you whether it is right or 
wrong for the female form to be properly draped — 
by which I mean that the figure should not be miduly 
conspicuous. Our present code of modesty says it 
should, and this has been so for centuries and cen- 
tiu'ies — in fact one might say from prehistoric 
times; and if we are to change it now the change 
must be a gradual one, going through several easy 
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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 111 

themselves to this backward movement on the part of 
womankind. Let us go a little more into detail. 

Low-necked dresses which are cut so low in the 
front that they reveal to the public gaze the breasts, 
in whole or in part, depending upon whether the 
woman be standing, sitting, or bending forward, can 
hardly meet with the approval of a person modestly 
inclined. Add to this the fact that many of these 
dresses have a V-shaped slit down the back, and 
one wonders why the wearer bothered about a waist 
at all, and whether modesty no longer exists in 
women. 

You answer me that it does ; and yet such dresses 
as these are only too common at many dances, par- 
ties, and evening affairs. Why any such gatherings 
should confer a special license on a woman to go 
around partially undressed is a mystery to other 
men besides myself, and, furthermore, where the 
beauty of it comes in men likewise fail to under- 
stand. These dresses are calculated to drive the 
thoughts of the men present into one of two grooves 
— disgust at the lack of decency, or that of sexual 
desire. Those guilty of this immodesty are not only 
yoimg girls, but many of them women old enough 
to know better, and who should be setting a better 
example to the growing girl. 

None of you, dressed only in an underskirt and 
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IW SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

thought of doing such a thing sounds foolish to you. 
Yoiu- modesty would prevent you from even men- 
tioning petticoats and corset covers to men. You 
would not like them even to imagine you in such a 
costume, and yet that is virtually how you often 
receive them, or a little bit less scantily attired. You 
wear a waist of the thinnest possible material that 
you can find so that it may easily be seen through, 
and in it you have insertions of lace or other material. 
And then, for fear the attention of the observers is 
not sufficiently called to the corset cover and the 
breasts back of it, you put colored ribbons in the 
corset covers, still further to call attention in this 
direction. You buy very handsome corset covers if 
your means allow it, not for your own gratification 
and delight, but because, in the style of your dressing, 
they are going to be seen by others. 

Many of you have thought little about whether 
your dress was modest or not, the question of style 
taking precedence of all other considerations. Now 
that it has been brought to your notice, think it over, 
and do not let the matter of style make you forget 
the more important dictates of maidenly modesty. 

By this time many of you are thinking how old- 
fashioned I am — ^and you are right. I am still old- 
fashioned enough to admire a modest, lady-like girl, 
and I am happy to say that there are still many more 
men and women like myself. 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 113 

But let us travel on with our talks. 

Formerly a woman who, for any reason, was 
compelled to raise her skirts, carefully lifted them 
just to the smallest possible extent necessary; but 
now, with her transparent stockings of lisle thread 
or silk, such modesty has seemingly taken wings 
and flown. She must show off her finery, and with it 
her lower limbs. For fear occasion for raising the 
skirts will not be offered sufficiently often, the skirts 
are left open on the sides, front or back, for varying 
distances from the bottom upwards, so that the fine 
hosiery and the limbs they more or less cover (the 
emphasis belongs on the " less ") will always be on 
view to whomsoever wishes to see. 

Do you know that a certain class of men look for 
just such exhibitions of immodesty? Prove it for 
yourselves by observing a crowd of them standing 
at some exposed place on a windy day. They are 
liable to misjudge you also, and to address you in 
very plain, unmistakable language, and to make to 
you propositions that are insulting. Would you like 
to be mistaken for, and classed among, the " fallen " 
women ? 

How many of you would be willing to walk 
through the street in broad daylight, or at night 
either, for that matter, in a pair of glove-fitting 
tights? Not many, I venture to say — ^and yet 
that is what many of you do daily with the present- 
8 



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114 SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 

day styles that you wear. Not a line of your figure 
is concealed, and, in fact, the lines are rather thrown 
out in bold relief. On a windy day the effect is exag- 
gerated to a most marked degree. Of course, the 
slashed skirt only tends to heighten this breach of 
modesty, if it can be made any worse without actu- 
ally removing the few clothes that are worn with 
your so-called ** hobble " skirts. When you sit down 
in this kind of garment, the display of your limbs is 
positively shocking to any real lady or gentleman. 

Again, we have the very disgusting fact that 
some of our girls, instead of trying to help along the 
unfortunate, fallen woman, and to raise her to a 
higher level in life, are actually adopting some of 
her styles of dress, always, heretofore, most strongly 
condemned. Not a very pleasing state of affairs, 
and one fraught with much danger for the future of 
our race. I think I know where the original hobble 
skirts came from. They look much like the skirts 
that the women in the Island of Java wear. From 
your studies in geography, you know the Javanese 
are only a semi-civilized people. 

If a man came up to you in the street and, with- 
out speaking to you, merely reached down and raised 
your skirts in order to see your lower limbs, you 
would think him insane, or that he had grossly in- 
sulted you. You would not be able to think of any- 
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SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 115 

him, and yet that is what your present mode of dres- 
sing would suggest that you wanted, except that you 
expose yourselves to view without giving any man 
that trouble. You may be in the style, but you are 
neither practising modesty nor preaching it, and you 
are exciting impure thoughts in the minds of your 
men acquaintances, and also in some men that you 
don't know. If you could hear some of the remarks 
they make about you under these circumstances you 
would not feel at all complimented, but, on the con- 
trary, very much mortified. My advice to you is, 
have a sufficient amount of backbone not to adopt 
any style which makes an immodest freak of you. 

Another article of dress which has somewhat 
changed is the female bathing suit. I need not go 
into details, for you are just as familiar with the 
present style as I am, and somewhat more so. Suffice 
it to say that formerly the bathing suit for women 
was designed to be as neat, inconspicuous, and mod- 
est as possible. Can this be said for the present 
stylish ones? 

And while speaking of bathing suits, I might 
comment on bathing conduct. Strange as it may 
seem to some of you, the rules of good breeding 
and refined behavior are as much to be regarded at 
this time as at any other. With the shedding of your 
street clothes for the delightful and healthful recrea- 
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or morals. Familiarity is just as much, perhaps even 
more to be resented at this time than at any other. 
Personally, I have been amazed by the carelessness, 
to express it mildly, in speech and action of many 
young women while bathing, their conduct at any 
other time or place being entirely different. 

Your person should be just as sacred to your 
male companion on the beach as at your home. 
Under cover of the water especially, some very im- 
proper familiarity in handling may be observed. Do 
not be one of that number who are unpleasantly 
criticized on account of their conduct on the beach. 
No, I am not a prude, nor opposed to healthy pleas- 
ures. As you can see, I am a very red-blooded in- 
dividual, not yet quite old enough to be a grand- 
father, but rather of an age to enjoy fun; but I want 
it to be clean fun, with no taint of impurity in it. 

While on the subject I might add a few remarks 
on general conduct at these outing resorts. Be a 
lady-like, well-bred woman, no matter where you 
are. Coarseness, familiarity of speech or action, 
lack of good manners, of breeding, or of refinement 
are always glaring faults, no matter what the cir- 
cumstances or where the place. To allow them or 
to be guilty of them is at the peril of your good name. 

Paint and powder ; it certainly seems queer that 
such things need be discussed by supposedly civilized 
human beings. Why a woman wants to decorate 



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— smear would be a better word — her face like 
a savage I never could understand. It certainly 
cannot add to her self-respect to go masquerading 
about like an Indian in his war paint. In fact, we 
laugh at them, and say they look ridiculous. I think, 
therefore, that it would be a good thing for those of 
you who use these so-called beautifiers if, after 
smearing yourselves with them, you would sit down 
in front of your mirrors, and see how ridiculous 
you look, and then think the matter over a little. 
Cosmetics do not give you a good complexion, but 
they will ruin the best. 

Almost all of you can secure a good complexion 
naturally, if you really want it and are willing to 
obey the laws of good health, even though they inter- 
fere somewhat with your pleasiu"e and ease. But 
paint and powder have only an artificial effect, and 
were formerly used only by wicked women. They 
had to use something to hide the ravages made by 
the dissipation which is part of their lives. 

Paint and powder are ruinous to the skin and 
will in time, owing to the ingredients they contain, 
make your faces look like poorly kept country roads, 
full of holes and rough spots. 

Dancing is to be condemned only when the dances 
are improper or it is carried to excess. Otherwise 
it is a harmless and healthful pastime and exercise, 
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118 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

course we cannot fndorse the public dance hall with 
its lack o£ supervision of those who meet there. 
In many of them there is a bar where intoxicating 
liquors are sold, and the patrons of the dance are 
naturally encouraged to drink. Such dance halls are 
certainly not the proper place for any decent girl. 

Dances where the poses or steps are suggestive 
should be condemned in unmeasured terms. Several 
such dances are now in vogue, and the fact that some 
of the so-called best society people permit them to 
be danced in their homes does not make them any 
the less objectionable. You all know as well as I do 
that some of our families designated as the best are 
such only from the view-point of financial worth, 
not from the standard of true worth based on 
achievement in things worth while — in refinement, 
education, morality, etc. 

Drinking must be mentioned only to be abso- 
lutely condemned in the strongest terms possible 
and without reserve. Indulgence in it has cost girls 
their womanly honor, and has kept them degraded. 
The liquor appetite is a terrible disease and difficult 
to cure. I advise you-as strongly as I can not to drink 
at all. You will be better in every way if you totally 
abstain from liquor. Your judgment will be your 
own, and you will make decisions according to your 
own reasoning, and not allow the alcohol within you 
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sexual desire, and, at the same time, blunts your 
normal perceptions of what is right. It is better to 
abstain from it in any manner, shape or form; but 
if, despite all its dangers so far as your morals are 
concerned, and the possibility of your becoming 
addicted to it with all the sufferings and disgrace 
that chronic alcoholism entails, you feel that you 
must drirtk and ruin your health, do so only at home, 
when you know that some member of your imme- 
diate family will remain in your company. Never, 
under any circumstances, indulge in it away from 
home. You will probably live to regret it if you do. 
Men, as a rule, do not like drinking in their wives. 

There are several other things I wish to speak 
of, so I must content myself with the foregoing, 
although much more could be said on these subjects. 
I have merely "scratched the surface" so as to 
start some trains of thought in your minds from 
which good should come. 

The advice I offer you next can be summed up 
in a few words. It is, " Do not flirt." Fallen women 
use such tactics in order to attract men. I have 
several times told you why, so there is no necessity 
for repetition. If you indulge in flirting, you need 
not feel offended if you are afterwards insulted by 
the man with whom you became acquainted in this 
way. 

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health. You cannot expect to be alert and active 
if you do not get a sufficient amount of sleep. There 
is still truth in the old saying: " Early to bed and 
early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and 
wise.*' 

Some girls, strange to say, are simple or vain 
enough to believe that when strangers drive up in an 
automobile or carriage and ask them to ride, it is 
because the occupants of the vehicle are either philan- 
thropists in disguise or because their own beauty 
is irresistible. If the invitation is accepted, by the 
time the automobile or carriage ride is over these 
girls are both sadder and wiser in the ways of the 
world, and the ranks of those sacrificed to the fetish 
of immorality are increased. Strangers who take 
you riding expect pay for it — ^high pay, as you see. 

If you do not like a man friend well enough to 
invite him to your house, or if he does not care to 
visit your house, I advise you to terminate your 
acquaintance at once. If you are ashamed of your 
home I am sorry for you, but my advice is still the 
same. If the young man is interested in you, your 
home and family ought to be good enough for him. 
In some cities, where the receiving of company too 
often can only be at the cost of g^eat inconvenience 
to the rest of the family, this difficulty is obviated by 
neighborhood clubs where young people may mingle 
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ant evening under proper, yet unobtrusive supervis- 
ion. At a reasonable hour they are expected to go 
home, and that is where they should go. Under all 
circumstances, though, your parents should know 
your men friends, therefore visits should sometimes 
be made at the house, even if a crowded home. 

The street is no place in which to arrange for 
meeting and spending an evening together. Neither 
is the back room of some saloon, nor some cheap 
dance hall. There is something wrong about the man 
who invites you to do these things. I cannot say, 
either, that I approve of evening strolls through 
lonely parts of poorly lighted parks. You are better 
off and safer where there are lights and other people, 
and you avoid the tongues of gossips. 

Do not accept invitations indiscriminately to go 
here and there. Even those from your own sex will 
bear scrutiny. Know all about a man from whom 
you do accept any kind of invitation, and be sure 
you are safe in his company ; for his regrets, sincere 
or otherwise, will not restore to you afterwards 
what you have lost. 

Should you go to a place of amusement alone 
or with another girl friend, avoid making acquaint- 
ances while there. You will find many persons of 
both sexes willing to enter into conversation with 
you, and to become quite " chummy " on short 
acquaintance. If you are wise, these attempts will 



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122 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

be repulsed in such a way that there can be no mis- 
take as to how you are receiving them. Should 
they still continue, you can appeal to those in charge 
for relief, a proceeding rarely necessary if you have 
behaved properly from the beginning. Many places 
of amusement are favorite resorts for both immoral 
men and women on the lookout for innocent, decent 
girls whom they seek to lure into lives of shame. 
You will recall that I told you there are some of your 
own sex just as dangerous to your morals as men. 

REVIEW 

I. In what beneficial ways does the mingling of the sexes 

affect the boy ? 
II. In what ways the girl? 

III. In what other ways can you assist a young man to lead 

a pure life? 

IV. What can be said of indiscriminate kissing, and how 

might it lead to immorality? 
V. Why should boys and girls mingle in crowds? 
VI. What is the surest way to avoid insult? 
VII. Mention some immodest forms of dress. 
VIII. Mention some immodest actions. 
IX. Explain the evils of drinking in this connection. 
X. Why should your friends be known in your homes, and 
what is the danger of indiscriminate chats and ac- 
quaintances ? 



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VII 

Up to this point in our talks on sex, we have 
travelled over a wide field. We have studied briefly 
anatomy, physiology, some normal functions, some 
loathsome yet serious diseases, immorality, and sev- 
eral other things. I hope I have made plain to you 
some of the matters that were heretofore mysteries. 

By this time you must have learned a great deal 
about yourselves and how to avoid certain dangers 
to your health. You are also aware of what venereal 
diseases are, why immorality is a poor investment 
for both sexes, and how you can avoid contracting 
any of the unpleasant results of this poor paying 
investment. 

In this talk we are going to travel still further, 
and discuss one of the most important events in any 
girl's life. We are to talk in a general way of mar- 
riage. Here also you will perhaps find me somewhat 
of a dreamer, because I am going to plead for only 
ideal marriages based on love. It seems to me that 
only with this for a basis can sexual relations, even 
in the married state, be other than immoral. It is 
not alone the marriage law of man that makes a 
marriage binding upon those who enter into this 
sacred estate, but the higher law of God according 

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to which marriage should be and truly is founded 
upon love — ^mutual love of the highest type. 

Why should the topic of marriage enter into a 
talk on sex? The answer is simple. Happy mar- 
riage is a most potent force for morality and the 
well-being of our race, both as concerns health and 
happiness; and, within certain limits, the earlier 
that happy marriage takes place the more potent its 
force for morality, therefore, also, for the health 
and happiness both of yourselves and of your 
children. 

I believe in early marriage for several reasons. 
The sexual function is in full development at a cer- 
tain age, and that seems to indicate that nature ad- 
vises mating at that time. Healthy sexual desire also 
makes itself felt at about this time, which also appears 
to be nature advising matrimony. It seems advisable, 
too, that parents should have children at such an age 
that, barring the ordinary uncertainties of life, they 
will still be living as their children grow up, to 
guide and to advise them in the problems of life, 
and be neither too old nor infirm to be interested 
in the affairs of their children when they need them 
most. I think the children bom of marriages late 
in life suffer many disadvantages, not the least of 
which is the advanced age of the parents as the 
children approach their majority, if indeed the 
parents are then living at all. 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 125 

Another reason for early marriage is the atti- 
tude of the contracting parties themselves. They 
are more susceptible to moulding — ^a necessary 
process in married life if you want to be more happy 
than the average couple. Two people with firm, set, 
and unyielding ideas may be a very imhappy married 
couple, even though they love each other dearly. 
The older you get the more set you become in your 
ways. 

Moreover, in the full bloom of your development 
childbirth is easier for you and better for your 
offspring. You will retain your youth more easily if 
childbirth comes earlier in life than if in later years, 
for in youth your recuperative powers are naturally 
better and stronger. 

But there are dangers in early marriage, and 
very real ones, which must not be overlooked. 
One of these is not being sure of loving the man you 
think of marrjring, for marriage should be a lifelong 
contract, and not a short term leasehold to be easily 
broken at any convenient time. The question as to 
when divorce is permissible, if one believes that it 
ever is, is hardly a part of our talks, therefore any 
discussion of the subject would be out of place. 
There is a vast difference between love and infatua- 
tion, and the marriages based on the latter, which 
might be called a coimterfeit of real love, are not 
likely to be lasting, or even happy in their brief 



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126 SEX TALKS TO GIRJLS 

duration. The trouble with most people is that they 
give more thought to the selection of a new outfit, 
let us say, than to the selection of a life partner and 
another parent for their children. 

It is a misfortune that most people approach the 
subject of marriage as a thing requiring no thought, 
whereas it is something of great import, and should 
be long and seriously considered before entered 
upon. " Marry in haste and repent at leisure '* is 
an apt epigram. Rather be happy and single than an 
unhappy wife. The latter is the most miserable of 
women, and is liable to add to her misery and un- 
happiness in a reckless, " I don't care for the conse- 
quences" search for something resembling hap- 
piness. 

The worst of it is that she seldom goes far in 
her search for some one who will share her troubles 
and misery under the guise of friendly sympathy. 
There are men vile enough to be constantly on the 
watch for just such women, and even more keenly 
for girls in desperate or discotxraged mood, and, 
under this same guise, seek their moral and physical 
ruin. One cannot be too careful as to whom she 
trusts, not only with her confidences, but also in the 
sort of sympathy she accepts. My warnings to you 
are based on facts, and not upon a too vivid imagina- 
tion, as you might in your innocence suspect. I have 
listened to many sad stories which concluded with. 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 127 

" If I had only known in the beginning what sort of 
a man (or woman) he (or she) was! " 

I will endeavor to tell you what I think a girl 
ought to look for in a man with whom she contem- 
plates matrimony. I do not believe that love should 
be blind ; on the contrary, I think it should be wide- 
awake in both parties; the more wide-awake it is 
before marriage, the more likely is the marriage to 
be happy. 

The man you marry you must live with, and 
must be his companion for the rest of your life. 
Therefore, if you are entering into marriage with 
the right idea of how long it should last, it is worth 
while to study him as he really is, and not as he 
appears to be on the surface. It is a fact to be 
regretted that young people associating together see 
each other only in their " company " manners, as it 
were, with the result that it is often a great shock 
when these " company '* manners are laid aside for 
others not nearly so pleasing. 

You should know the man with whom you con- 
template matrimony in other aspects than that of 
courting. Even the least desirable of men can be 
pleasant and attractive at such times, but the other 
times are the ones of greatest importance to you. 
There are two old toasts that I will here mention. The 
first is, " Here's to our wives and our sweethearts, 
and may they never meet ! " The girl who rushes 



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128 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

into matrimony blindly is liable to have a husbaad 
who is proposing this toast in some barroom in a 
mixed and dissolute company. The second toast is 
as follows : " Here's to our wives and our sweet- 
hearts. May our sweethearts soon become our 
wives, and our wives always be our sweethearts ! " 
The careful girl who gives deep thought to her pro- 
posed marriage is more likely to choose a husband 
who will daily toast her thus, both at and away 
from home. 

The first essential for marriage is mutual love 
of the purest and most constant type. Do not marry 
a man merely because he loves you if you cannot 
truthfully say you love him. Do not marry a man 
because you love him, if you know he does not love 
you as much. In either case the risk of such a mar- 
riage, as a happy, or even a lasting one, is very 
great. 

Select your husband for his manliness, for that 
is the measure of his true worth. Observe how he 
treats his mother, his sisters, and other women with 
whom he comes into contact in his daily life ; not only 
those toward whom business policy demands consid- 
eration, but those to whom courtesy and considera- 
tion would be extended only by the dictates of a 
gentlemanly instinct. As his habit is, so will he treat 
you in the long run as the newness and the " honey- 
moon " state of your married life wear off. 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 129 

Do not select a heavy and excessive drinker with 
the idea that you are going to reform him. If you 
marry him, your chances of success are very slight. 
If you feel brave enough to take a chance on his 
future, reform him first and marry him afterwards, 
but do not be in a hurry with the marriage ceremony ; 
be sure he is " reformed." H^ may stay " re- 
formed " if you are a particularly good wife, and 
give him to understand that you will excuse no 
lapses from grace. 

Do not marry a man of excessively loose morals, 
and think that because he is married to you he will 
give up his past mode of life. He may, but it is very 
doubtful, and the chances are that he will not He 
is also likely to ruin your health, therefore your 
happiness, by giving to you some of the diseases he 
contracted during those days when he was busy de- 
grading your sex under the delusion that he was 
very manly and merely "sowing his wild oats.'* 
Marry a pure man who respects your sex. If you 
are so unfortunate as to marry one who has dese- 
crated the sacred sexual relation before marriage, at 
least see to it that he shows his respect for you by 
having abstained ever since he entertained thoughts 
of marrying you. Your chances of having a decent 
husband will be better, the less depraved the man 
was before marriage. 

Do not think you are in love with a man because 
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130 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

he gives you " a good time." Free spenders do not 
necessarily make liberal husbands. You see it is 
hard to keep up an outside reputation as a liberal 
spender, and at the same time support a home in 
comfort, especially on a small salary in these times 
of excessively high cost of living. Spenders before 
marriage, too, sometimes find it hard to give up the 
habit and to settle down into husbands with house- 
hold responsibilities. 

Do not think that every man who dresses in a 
manner that pleases you is financially in the automo- 
bile class. Some of them owe their tailors, and, if 
you are no judge of material, even cheap, ready-made 
clothes may impress you. A single man on a very 
small salary, with no financial responsibilities else- 
where, may make a very good appearance. 

What do I mean? Just this. It is surprising to 
find how many women marry without even knowing 
the nature of their husband's employment, nor his 
earnings. There is quite a difference between marry- 
ing for money, and marrying a husband whom you 
may have to support out of any money you may have 
or may be obliged to earn. A quiet, honest, plain- 
spoken, even-tempered, kind, thoughtful, and home- 
loving man ought to make a good husband. 

Now, how are you to make a good wife ? 

First, maintain a constant and true love of the 
most high and earnest type for your husband. You 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 131 

must make your home a cheerful, restful place, to 
which he will turn after his daily work with happiest 
anticipation and pleasure. Bear in mind that your 
daily housework is no more monotonous, nor is it 
harder, than his daily grind at business, and he has 
a right to expect a neat, smiling wife on his return 
to his home. So many of you are business women 
that you can appreciate the truth of my statement 
that business duties bring cares and troubles as well 
as home duties. The difference is that you, as 
commander-in-chief, can regulate the home cares 
and duties to a certain extent, whereas those in 
business must bear the brunt not only of routine 
cares and troubles, but also, ofttimes, the special 
" grouches " of their superiors. 

Study your husband's likes and dislikes; strive 
to cater somewhat to the former, and carefully avoid 
the latter. Be unselfish and affectionate, but do not 
overdo the latter. Love and kisses, embraces and 
caresses are a rich diet for any man, and must be 
combined with good housekeeping as to food (so 
as not to give your husband indigestion), neatness 
of house and self, and the keeping of clothing in 
good repair to be a success. Give to your husband 
the very best that is in you, and be patient with his 
shortcomings even as you expect him to overlook 
yours. Build the foundation of your married life 
on the firm and enduring rock of love, not on the 



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1S2 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

shifting sands of infatuation or any other reason 
for marriage. 

Will it surprise you to know that your husband 
will probably appreciate a knowledge on your part 
of cooking rather than of bookkeeping; of dress- 
making rather than that you be an expert stenogra- 
pher; of millinery rather than have you know the 
duties of a bill clerk ; likewise, of other things that 
go to make you a good wife rather than a woman 
of business? To my mind, it is wrong that you 
should be taught everything that pertains to busi- 
ness life and no effort be made to teach you what 
pertains to home life; and yet it is in the home that 
the majority of you are going to make of your lives 
a success or a failure. The prevalent indifference to 
this fact is a puzzling thing to those of us who seek 
for the good of the present, and plan for the future 
of our nation. 

In a happy marriage, sexual relations are a pleas- 
ure and a happiness which gradually come as a 
climax to the expression of the highest love. In 
marriage without love, the sexual relations are little 
more than immoral, because the marriage contract 
simply legalizes the animal desires aroused by sexual 
passion. Do not be this sort of a wife. Do not sell 
your womanhood for mere worldly gain. Do not be 
the sort of wife who differs only from the mistress 
because of a few insincere marriage vows. Your 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 13S 

sense of what is due to you, your self-respect, and 
your sense of decency should make such a marriage 
revolting to you. Be a true woman in all that the 
term implies, and thus be more than worthy of the 
best man living. 

Between husband and wife there should be per- 
fect accord and frankness. For one to have secrets 
from the other is sure to bring about misunderstand- 
ings and distrust, and worse things in the future. 
Any apparent necessity for secrecy can be avoided 
by living an open and irreproachable life. Married 
women are strongly urged not to have intimate 
friends among the opposite sex, and particularly to 
be avoided is the husband's best friend, as he is 
usually the first one of whom the husband becomes 
jealous. Jealous husbands are not unlike jealous 
women — ^very unreasonable, and sometimes a men- 
ace to one's personal safety. 

A wife must not go about looking for causes for 
jealousy. If she does, she is liable to find them, but 
the great majority will be the result of an over- 
worked imagination. Even a married man may talk 
occasionally to a woman other than his wife, or the 
female members of her family, without being guilty 
of neglecting his wife. A wife should not listen to 
every gossip who comes along with tales calculated 
to make trouble, least of all should she hasten to 
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134 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

to their happiness, unless careful investigation has 
shown her the truth of what she complains of. 

Indulgence to excess in the marriage relation is 
detrimental to the health of both husband and wife, 
weakening to mind and body, and dangerous to re- 
sulting offspring from both a physical and a mental 
standpoint. If you will recall what I told you in 
some of my previous lectures, you can readily un- 
derstand why this is so. 

Do not attempt to avoid the responsibilities of 
motherhood unless there are physical reasons for 
so doing. What these reasons are we need not here 
relate; they are for discussion in the physician's 
office only. Be a mother if you possibly can ; if you 
cannot, you are to be pitied for many reasons. 

Many childless marriages might have been fruit- 
ful if the wife, when a girl, had not through false 
modesty failed to be treated for certain complaints 
from which she suffered at that time. Many of the 
leucorrhoeal troubles come under this heading, owing 
to the chronic inflammation they set up in the various 
parts of the female procreative tract. Of course, 
all childless marriages are not the fault of the wife ; 
many of them are, however, and from positively 
preventable causes. Should it be the misfortune of 
any of you to marry and be childless, I would advise 
that before you place yourself under treatment, 
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SEX TALKS TO GIBJLS 135 

perhaps, he is not the one to blame. Sexual disor- 
ders before marriage may have affected in him the 
viability of the male contribution to creation. If 
this is so, there is no reason why you should receive 
unnecessary medical treatment. It is a simple matter 
to determine this fact in a man, and it should be 
done before subjecting you to inconvenience. 

An ideal mother is woman at her best. When 
she has achieved this crowning glory, she has reached 
the highest goal that a woman can strive for. 
Almost any woman can give birth to a child, but it 
takes a bright woman to be a real mother. Merely 
giving birth to a child does not make a female a true 
mother any more than the marriage ceremony makes 
a woman more than a wife in name. The gray 
matter must be called into action to make either a 
real wife or an ideal mother. It takes much more 
common-sense to succeed here than it does to make 
a business success or to shine in the social world. 
College courses in wifehood and motherhood are 
not an idea to be laughed at, but, if properly estab- 
lished, would be of great value and would add to 
your welfare and happiness. 

It is really more important to understand thor- 
oughly the natural duties that nature intended you 
to fulfil than all the so-called higher educational 
branches that a college faculty can put in a curricu- 
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136 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

if such courses in wifehood and motherhood were 
established and became justly popular. Courses in 
the making of a good husband and father should also 
be established. It is really pitiful to see how poorly 
equipped both sexes are for married life when they 
enter into this important contract, and this is why 
so many couples make a failure of their enterprise 
and come to grief. Parents would not think of send- 
ing you into the business or social world so poorly 
equipped with the knowledge necessary for success, 
and yet this much more important matter is left 
almost entirely to chance. Is it any wonder that 
some of us look with anxiety into the future? 

Such college courses as proposed above would 
have to include sexual matters, as here a proper 
understanding is most necessary to marital success. 
Yes, I know that in times gone by girls did not re- 
ceive such training, but I am also aware that they 
were kept at their mothers' sides. They were not 
sent out to work at such tender ages as to be still 
almost babies in years, yet asked to be women in 
responsibility and knowledge. They did not leave 
home early in the morning and struggle with the 
industrial juggernaut, returning late at eventide. In 
times gone by they were at home. Neither do those 
of you who do not have to work see much more of 
your homes ; your " social duties '' are too many. 
In neither case do you receive any home training. 



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Wives and husbands both have certain sexual 
rights which should be perfectly understood. Dif- 
ferences in sexual appetite must be adjusted to make 
a perfect union. A non-passionate wife married to 
a very passionate husband, or the reverse, is liable to 
cause dissension, unless care and diplomacy are ex- 
ercised by both. I advise moderation for the sake 
of their own health and happiness and for the benefit 
of any offspring. While I do not believe that any 
husband or wife need apologize for having strong 
sexual instincts, still this is often unnatural and 
due to certain conditions that need medical treat- 
ment, just as in the case of the single woman whom 
we discussed in an earlier talk, who suffered from 
supposed sexual desire which was due to abnormal 
conditions. 

So, also, if the sexual relation is apparently re- 
pugnant or painful to the woman, the physician 
should be consulted to correct what is wrong. It 
is important that the sexual part of married life be 
mutually agreeable and pleasurable; on it depends 
the perpetuation of our race and to a great degree 
the quality of the offspring. 

There are other things which could be said re- 
garding the sexual relations between man and wife ; 
but, as some of you are not yet engaged or ready to 
enter the married state I have, after some thought, 
decided to omit them here.- In my private practice 



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138 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

I make it a rule always to have a little confidential 
talk before the wedding with all of my patients who 
have become engaged, whether it be a man or woman 
patient. I think these talks are valuable to them, 
and help to promote their happiness. I would ad- 
vise each of you, when you become engaged to be 
married and when the time approaches for "the 
wedding bells " to ring, to go to your family phy- 
sician, and ask him to advise you in regard to the 
new life you are about to enter upon. I am sure 
he will help you to avoid some of the " rough 
places " that other women encoimter in their early 
married life. 

You may already know, but, if not, I will tell 
you, that the honeymoon is not always the fine time 
it is meant to be. I regret to say that, in many in- 
stances, it is not an agreeable trip for either newly- 
made husband or wife. This is easily explained. 
Both have heretofore lived in the unreality of 
" castles in the air," and, having come down to life 
as it is, they find it different from their dreams. 
To those who have been forewarned and are fore- 
annfe^6ip adjustment of things is more easy. 

Of course, it is rather difficult for a man to get 
acquainted with another girl, as he must often do, 
when, as the retiring hour approaches, he watches 
her face lose its bloom as she washes it, her hair 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 139 

become quite reduced in quantity and quality as she 
removes most of it and places it on the dresser for 
the night; watches her eyebrows become less marked 
and more scant as the water again does its cleansing 
work; with amazement he sees rosy lips fade to a 
much lighter hue, and about this time — but why 
goon? 

As I say, it is hard for him but, being a man, 
he pulls himself together and thinks her as lovely 
and lovable as ever. She should be just as lenient 
in regard to some of the surprises he may have in 
store for her. Personally, I think the hardest thing 
that most couples have to bear is to get used to each 
other's personal habits. One who is very dainty in 
her habits, whose idea of cleanliness includes a daily 
bath, clean teeth, and sweet-smelling mouth, is nat- 
urally not at all pleased if the new life partner is 
rather careless in these matters. This gives you 
some idea of what I mean by personal habits, so I 
need not enter into any lengthy discussion of these. 

Before closing I want to say a few words about 
the running of the house. The wife should be given 
a definite allowance each week, month, or whenever 
it can best be arranged. It should be absolutely 
understood just what household expenses she is to 
defray out of this allowance. This will prevent 
much friction. She will know that extra expense 
must be met by an extra allowance, and can plan 



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140 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

accordingly, just as she will know that anything left 
over from this allowance is hers and need not be 
accounted for. 

The husband also should have a stated allowance, 
and the difference between the sum of the two al- 
lowances and the income should be a savings' fund 
only to be drawn upon by mutual consent. This may 
seem to you a matter of small consequence, but all 
married couples will tell you that it is of prime im- 
portance. In making these arrangements, do not 
forget that families usually increase in size, there- 
fore the household allowance will have to be added 
to from time to time. 

Bear in mind, too, that it is an advantage to have 
something saved up for possible " rainy days," no 
matter how well off you may be at present. It is 
also your duty to yourselves and to your children 
to see to it that the father of your offspring devotes 
a certain part of his income to a life insurance. 
These last few points may be somewhat foreign to 
sex talks, but they are practical, I think, and will 
do you no harm. 

REVIEW 

I. What is the chief essential to happy marriage? 
II. Why should the topic of marriage enter into a talk on 
sex? 

III. What are the advantages of early marriage? 

IV. What are its dangers? 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 141 

V. What are some of the qualities a g^rl should look for in 
the man? What should she avoid? Explain fully. 
VI. How can you become a good wife? 

VII. What should you avoid ? 

VIII. Discuss the sexual relation in married life. 

IX. How might disease in the girl affect the motherhood 
of the woman, and what can be done to prevent 
this? 
X. Mention a good way in which to adjust the financial 
running of the home. 



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VIII 

The subject-matter of this talk should be of in- 
terest to every real woman — ^wifehood and mother- 
hood. I feel as if I could not do justice to the sub- 
ject, and no matter how much I try nor how much I 
say, I shall have barely begfun to cover it. So, in 
advance of what is to follow, I offer you my humble 
apologies for the shortcomings of my work. If I 
omit anything that you wish to know, remind me of 
it in the usual discussion that follows each of our 
little talks. ( See preface. ) 

In the last paper I gave you a few hints as to 
what helps to make a good wife, which hints, I sin- 
cerely hope, will be of use to you and your girl 
friends in the future. In this paper I shall assume 
that I am speaking to a good wife who is yearning 
to strengthen the bond that binds her husband to her 
and her to her husband — ^the bond of parentage. 

How will she know that this great event is going 
to take place in her life ? How know that this triumph 
of great, rich, and mutually pure love is going to be 
realized? There are several things which precede 
this event and announce its coming. It is important 
that our good wife should know what these are, so 
that, in their event, she will place herself at once 
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SEX TALKS TO GIBJLS 143 

under the care of a good physician in whom she has 
perfect confidence, and whose personality and pro- 
fessional methods are both pleasing and satisfactory 
to her. 

Childbirth is an event in a woman's life in which 
little details should receive attention, as they coimt 
for much with her at this time. I want to emphasize 
the importance of having the expectant mother place 
herself under the care of a physician as early as pos- 
sible, because he can smooth for her many of the 
rough places on the road to motherhood. There are 
many small matters which, if attended to early by 
the expectant mother, will later make both mother 
and child healthier and happier, for health makes 
for happiness, and, without the former, there cannot 
be much of the latter. 

Before speaking of the earlier and later signs of 
approaching motherhood, I want to give a few 
words of advice to the good wife who is so fortu- 
nate as to be approaching that blessed state. It may 
save her from some very unpleasant thoughts and 
suspicions, and from some very unhappy and regret- 
table moments with her husband. 

For some obscure reason, the expectant mother 
often undergoes a complete change of mind in her 
likes and dislikes. What pleased her before is very 
likely now to have become distasteful to her. A 
happy, sunny-tempered girl may be changed into a 



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144 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

worrisome, moody one; a moody one may become a 
sunny one; the quiet, reserved girl may even attract 
attention by the lightness of her demeanor, and so on. 
In most cases these changes are but temporary. 
Where the changes are for the better, it is to be re- 
gretted that they are not permanent ; but it is also a 
good thing that, where for the worse, they are only 
temporary. 

It is while these changes are in progress that 
husbands suffer undeservedly. No matter what they 
do, it is wrong. If they remain at home, they should 
have gone out; whereas if they had gone out, they 
should have remained at home. The wife often 
imagines herself to be slighted when such a thing 
was never intended. Neglect is even charged where 
none exists. The husband is accused of want of 
attention and affection when, on the contrary, con- 
ditions are just the same as they were, or are per- 
haps better, for even the most undemonstrative of 
men is usually somewhat moved over the idea of the 
arrival of an heir, and the accompanying condition 
of his wife. 

I think that, perhaps, forewarning the young 
wife of these things will help matters, for if she re- 
calls them at this time she will try to avoid such un- 
pleasantness and save her husband and herself much 
unhappiness. Unfortunately, most husbands do 
not know that these changes are to be expected, 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 145 

and, not understanding the reason for the great 
change in their wives, they lose patience and 
say and do things in the heat of the moment 
that they would not if they understood. I make 
a particular point of this matter in my book, 
" Ten Sex Talks to Boys," so as to enable them the 
better to appreciate this condition, where in igno- 
rance this " preceding stage " is of ttimes most trying 
to both, and the links in their chain of happiness are 
often strained almost to the breaking point. 

As you can well imagine such a state of affairs 
is most detrimental to the unborn, developing child, 
both mentally and physically. For certainly at this 
time in married life the love and devotion of the 
wife and husband should be at the highest point, 
for the benefit of both mother and child. The hap- 
pier and calmer the maternal mind, so much the 
better for the child. Certain characteristics and 
hereditary traits were given to the growing child by 
the ovirni and the male contribution to creation in the 
very beginning, and other traits of character and 
impressions are no doubt received during the grow- 
ing stage within the mother's womb. This will show 
you how important is everything in the environment 
of the mother-to-be. 

The appetite of the future mother also becomes 
affected. The kind of food she formerly relished now 
disgusts her, and she craves things that until recently 
10 • 



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she had no desire for. Often she feels a longing for 
things not ordinarily considered suitable for human 
food. She eats these things, however, and appar- 
ently thrives on them ; at least she shows no ill effects 
from her strange diet. This, again, is only a passing 
fancy which rights itself in a short time. 

Sometimes, but not often, the mother-to-be be- 
comes careless about her personal appearance. This 
should not be so, for, even during the last few weeks 
before childbirth, cleanliness and neatness are per- 
fectly possible. It is a mistake for any wife, 
either at the time of childbirth or any other time, to 
fall into slovenly habits. You cannot always look 
as if you had stepped out of a fashion plate, and no 
husband wants you to look so at any time ; but you 
can always be neat and tidy and your husband will 
appreciate it. Remember that in your courting days 
you accustomed him to see a clean, tidy, well- 
groomed girl, and this is the girl he married. Can 
you blame him, therefore, if he objects to a slovenly, 
imcombed, dowdy looking wife? Some wives get 
into the habit of appearing at the breakfast table just 
about as they got up from bed with the exception of 
the kimono which they slip on over their night-robes. 
Don't join this class. You owe it to your husband to 
be just as neat and attractive at the breakfast table 
in his company as at the evening meal when dressed 
for possible guests at, or after, dinner. 



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Your habits of neatness have a good effect oti 
him, and set him a good example to remain the neat, 
well-groomed man you married. It is wise to keep 
up all the refinements of life after marriage, and to 
improve still more if you can. Advance, even after 
marriage — do not stand still. But, whatever you do, 
do not go backward ! Make every effort to guard 
against this. Do all you can do to improve your 
husband and yourself. I do not mean in a business 
or material way, but in education and cultivation. 
You have a brain, so you should use it. Ideal 
motherhood includes the use of the intellect, and to 
be the ideal mother requires more ability than is 
necessary for a college education, or "women's 
rights " movements, or even the suffragette pro- 
paganda. 

Many women whom I have known as girls, and 
who have discussed their plans for the future with 
me, filled me with hope as to the kind of mothers 
they would make. How disappointed I have been 
when, on arriving at this happy time in their lives, 
I saw that they had deteriorated after marriage, and 
all their lofty aims had come to naught. From be- 
ing well-groomed, capable girls, they had become 
slovenly, untidy, and without ambition, unless a de- 
sire to be up to date in all the neighborhood gossip 
could be so considered. It is easy from this to im- 
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148 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

husbands soon realized the necessity for club life in 
the evening. 

I am digressing widely from my subject, so I 
must stop right here, and return to our little wife, 
for I have been neglecting her. How is she to know 
when she should become interested in patterns for 
baby clothes? How is she to know when to begin 
to make those dainty negligee robes in which to 
receive her friends soon after the arrival of her 
baby? 

There are some signs that make it easy to know. 
One of the first and most reliable is the stoppage of 
menstruation or the monthly period. This is almost 
invariable, and, although there may be other causes 
for the cessation, this particular cause is by far the 
most common. 

And sleep! How overpowering is the wish for 
it! The little wife can hardly finish her dinner in 
the evening before her eyes close. She does not seem 
to get enough sleep, try as she will, and is not very 
good company for her husband in the evenings on 
that account. She almost falls asleep while eating 
her dinner ; in fact, it is hard to decide whether she 
wants most to eat or to sleep, for hunger is a marked 
symptom also. As with sleep, can she ever get 
enough food? At meals, between meals, she is, 
always eating, and is still hungry. 

A change in the eyes is noted. Dark rings ap- 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 149 

pear beneath them, more noticeable in some women 
than in others. There are also changes in the breasts. 
They become harder and firmer, and develop in size 
quite rapidly. Sometimes they feel tense and pain- 
ful, and there is a sense of fulness which is more 
noticeable as pregnancy advances. Often, quite 
early in the pregnancy, a little fluid can be squeezed 
out of the nipples. The brownish area surroimd- 
ing the nipples enlarges in size and grows darker in 
color. Within this area several little lumps like peas 
become quite prominent. 

The expectant mother will also notice a slight 
sense of weight in the pelvic cavity or lower part 
of the body, and will also be conscious that she has 
an irritable bladder by having a constant desire to 
urinate. This early and frequent desire to empty 
the bladder does not mean that anything is wrong 
with the bladder or kidneys ; it is due merely to in- 
creased pressure within the pelvis which, of course, 
affects the bladder. 

If she was formerly constipated, she is more so 
now; and if her bowels were regular before, she is 
inclined now to be constipated. This condition must 
be corrected at once, and must be guarded against 
throughout her pregnancy and, in fact, at all other 
times. If not promptly relieved, it only adds to the 
pain, and the danger of infection and lacerations 
during labor. 



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150 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

The general appearance of the wife shows al- 
teration at this time, which may appear in one of two 
ways. In some women there is general and marked 
improvement, whereas in others the face is greatly 
changed for the worse. Usually this is merely tem- 
porary in either case, and the husband finds he has 
the same looking wife that he married, with the ad- 
ditional beauty which comes with motherhood. 

These are probably about all of the signs that the 
wife will notice early, and they are sufficient for her 
purposes. What signs the doctor's examination will 
reveal when she consults him would be foreign to 
our talks, so I will not detail them here. 

As the baby develops within the womb, other 
changes are apparent to the mother-to-be, one of 
the most impleasant of which is the so-called " morn- 
ing sickness." This is a feeling of nausea, often 
accompanied by vomiting, occurring most often in 
the morning upon arising from bed, but continuing 
§pmetimes throughout the day. This may come on 
at any time from about the fifth week of pregnancy, 
and usually lasts only until the twelfth week. Some 
women, however, are so unfortimate as to have this 
" sea sickness " last much longer. 

This is rather a distressing time for the ex- 
pectant mother, for it is hard to have a good ap- 
petite, and with it a stomach which will not allow 
you to eat ; it seems a dreadful waste of time to eat, 



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only to vomit immediately all that you have swal- 
lowed, even before you have finished whatever food 
you were taking. It is a most peculiar state of 
affairs. The mere mention of the word " food " is 
enough to make some pregnant women vomit; in 
other words, the sight or smell of food, either raw 
or cooked, makes the stomach reject its contents. 
While pregnant, many women can eat at a restaurant 
and retain their food, yet cannot eat at all at home.' 
Others will eat the strangest articles of food and 
digest them, whereas their stomachs will reject their 
usual articles of diet. Some will practically escape 
this unpleasantness altogether, while with others it 
lasts almost throughout the pregnancy period. All 
come through it safely, however, and if under the 
care of a physician he will help them a great deal. 

All of you have heard that, with the coming of 
children, the mother's teeth suffer; this is not true. 
With proper care, the expectant mother can prevent 
this unfortunate occurrence. The first thing to do 
is to see that the digestive organs are in good order, 
thereby making the digestion good, the bowels reg- 
ular, and the teeth and mouth clean and free from 
an acid reaction. The next thing to do is to supply 
nourishment to the teeth to take the place of that 
formerly furnished, but which is now needed for the 
development of the unborn child. 

Here, again, is another advantage of early med- 



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152 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

ical care. The doctor regulates the digestion and 
the bowels, and also prescribes the necessary medica- 
tion for the teeth. It is taken for granted that the 
woman's own habits of cleanliness will make her 
clean her teeth and wash her mouth at least once 
every day. If the doctor discovers she does not, he 
orders this needful hygiene of the mouth. 

You have all probably heard that the veins of the 
lower extremities are liable to enlarge at this time, 
and that piles may be expected as the developing 
child grows within the womb. These two things 
also are preventable by proper measures. They are 
due to the increased pressure within and to any con- 
stipation which may exist. If additional support be 
given to the veins liable to be affected, and constipa- 
tion be guarded against, the chances are that no bad 
results will follow. 

As the waistline increases in circumference be- 
cause of the enlargement of the womb and its con- 
tents, the clothes of the wife must be made larger 
and more comfortable, for compression of the body 
is harmful in many ways. It may cause a miscar- 
riage, or the unborn child may be forced into a bad 
position within the womb, or it may even cause the 
womb itself to become displaced. Either of the 
latter conditions will necessarily complicate the de- 
livery of the child when it comes into the world. 
The wife must always bear in mind that the womb — 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 153 

which I described to you in my first talk — ^must en- 
large from the tiny little organ that it is in both the 
virgin and the resting states to a size somewhat 
larger than the new-born baby, because, besides hold- 
ing the fully developed child, it must hold also the 
wrappings which entirely envelop the baby, as well 
as the fluid in which it is contained, and this amounts 
to several quarts. 

When the pregnant wife places herself under the 
advice of the doctor of her choice he will instruct 
her how to care for and prepare her breasts and 
nipples. Every normal mother wants to nurse her 
child if she possibly can, and proper preparation of 
the breasts for this function helps her and prevents 
such things as sore or cracked nipples, fissures, etc. 

I have just told you that every normal woman 
wants to nurse her baby if she can. Why ? Because 
the food that Mother Nature puts into the female 
breasts is the best food for any baby. It contains 
everything that the baby needs in the most important 
days of its life in the way of food and drink. It 
is the food "par excellence" for infants. When 
you consider what the growth and development of 
the baby are during the first nine months of its life 
this seems a most wonderful food, and any mother 
should be proud of the fact that she can give to her 
offspring this most wonderful of nutriments. And 
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154 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

with his patient to induce her to nurse her baby, 
because it interferes with her pleasure. Baby feed- 
ing will be discussed in a later talk, so I will say no 
more now, except that I hope none of you, on at- 
taining the dignityof motherhood, will be practically 
forced to nurse your baby, should nature have pro- 
vided you with the means therefor. 

The expectant mother must avoid over-exerting 
herself, either in the pursuit of her daily household 
duties or in pleasures. Missteps resulting in a sud- 
den stumble areivery serious because of their lia- 
bility to dislodge. the contents of the womb, and 
cause a premature birth. Likewise straining or 
stretching, rough pleasures, . jumping, jolting, or 
bouncing are to be avoided, as these things also may 
bring on a miscarriage. 

During the ante-birth period besides seeing that 
the bowels are regular the action of the kidneys must 
be watched, and the appearance and quantity of the 
urine carefully noted. In this stage, the kidneys 
have to carry off the waste material not only of the 
mother but of the unborn child also, for you must 
bear in mind that the imbom child is a living being, 
having the same functions as any other living being. 
If the kidneys, therefore, for any reason, fail to work 
properly, the poisonous waste of the two bodies 
is retained within the system of the mother, often 
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Let me explain this a little further to you, so that 
you will understand it better. There are several 
ways in which the body gets rid of its waste mate- 
rial. The lungs throw off some, the perspiration 
eliminates some, the bowels remove a little ; contrary 
to what you may have thought, the excretion from 
the bowel is mostly undigested food and the residue 
of food the digestable part of which the body has 
taken for its nourishment. The kidneys are the 
main sewers of the body and they throw off most of 
the body waste dissolved in the urine. You can real- 
ize, therefore, that a failure on the part of the urine 
to do this, through a breakdown or impairment of 
the kidney-secreting tissue, means that much waste 
material is being held in the body and is poisoning it. 
With these poisons circulating through her blood, 
the mother becomes affected, and as it is from her 
blood that the baby's blood draws its supply of 
nourishment for the unborn child, you see there is 
real danger for the baby also. 

The watching of the kidney function, therefore, 
is another and very important reason why early 
medical attention is advisable, and some time in the 
future when you are pregnant my suggestion should 
be followed by you. By making frequent examina- 
tions of the urine, the doctor knows how things are 
going. He also tells his patient of certain signs 
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156 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

at once, so that, if he deems it necessary, he can 
make additional urinary examinations, give medica- 
tion, or regulate her diet. Some of these signs are 
dizziness, headaches, trouble with the eyesight, nau- 
sea, and vomiting, the passing of less urine or a very 
marked increase in the amount ; there are also several 
others. 

As the time of motherhood approaches, our little 
wife becomes less inclined to go out and take exer- 
cise. Her reasons are usually two — ^the increased 
weight and pressure within, and her personal appear- 
ance. But she must have exercise — in moderation, 
of course. 

The first reason for her disinclination can be 
overcome by slow walking on level ground. Her 
second reason, due to a feeling of modesty, is foolish. 
No woman who has become pregnant under proper 
circumstances need be ashamed of her coming 
honor. Everyone is not going to look at her as she 
imagines, nor make unpleasant comments upon her 
appearance and its portent. Many a woman who 
has been denied the privilege of motherhood would 
gladly exchange with her for the same reward. I 
do not say that there are no places where the ex- 
pectant mother should not go, but my reasons are 
as much medical as anything else. The influence of 
any action of the mother or father on the unborn 
child must always be considered. In taking exercise 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 157 

of any kind, however, whether work or play, our 
little wife should always stop just short of fatigu- 
ing herself, for this would be harmful. 

Under the wise and sympathetic direction of her 
chosen medical attendant, who watches carefully 
over her in every way, guarding her against both 
lack of food and too much food, our wife approaches 
the time for the advent of " their " child, anxiously 
awaiting that moment when she can show her hus- 
band this living triumph of their mutual love and 
its gratification in the sacred and holy bonds of mat- 
rimony. She is not afraid of her approaching 
motherhood, because she knows that mdtherhood is 
a natural fimction following her promotion to wife- 
hood, and she wants this emblem of honor — smother- 
hood — to be hers. 

While she is waiting for "their" child to be 
born, like every mother-to-be, she is planning a fu- 
ture for it; and, if she has been careful in the choice 
of her husband, she is now doubly happy about it, 
for she considers how much better her baby will be 
owing to her care in the selection of its father. And, 
oh, what a relief it is to her mind if she knows that 
her husband is free from any venereal taint ! For 
then she need not worry about the possible effects of 
venereal disease upon her baby, nor has her preg- 
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to take unpleasant medicines in order to protect the 
offspring from inheriting some venereal taint. 

You see, when there is any suspicion in the doc- 
tor's mind that husband or wife has a syphilitic taint 
in the blood, he endeavors to protect the unborn 
child from this poison by giving curative medicines 
to the mother during the ante-birth period. If hus- 
band or wife suspects that either of them has ever 
had this disease, no matter how lightly, the doctor 
should be told of it, so that he can judge whether 
protective measures for the coming offspring are 
necessary. Even unnecessary medication is pref- 
erable to having a child born with a syphilitic taint. 

REVIEW 

I. State in detail why an expectant mother should have 
a medical advisor as early as possible. 

II. Why is it advisable for both husband and wife to under- 
stand changes of temperament, ideals, appetite, etc., 
in the expectant mother? 

III. What is the ideal life for an expectant mother to lead — 

and what are its advantages, (a) to mother (b) 
to child? 

IV. What are the early signs of expectant motherhood? 
V. What are the later ones? 

VI. What are the added dangers of constipation at this time? 
VII. Why must tight fitting clothes, or in fact an)rthing tight, 

be avoided by the expectant mother? 
VIII. How does the body get rid of its waste? 
IX. Describe the importance of the function of the kidney 
in general and its particular importance during 
pregnancy. 
X. Why must the kidney function be carefully watched 
during pregnancy ? 



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IX 

Now we skip an interval — that of the birth of 
the child and what goes with it — ^and take up child 
management. We will not go into every detail, for 
that I shall leave to my other series, which follows 
this, on the care of the child from infancy to mar- 
riage. 

The management of a child begins at birth, and 
if you institute it properly you will be saved many 
miserable hours of discomfort and disturbed rest in 
the future. Babies can be made sources of great 
pleasure and happiness, or little tyrannical disturbers 
of the peace, quiet, and good tempers of the house- 
hold, not to mention the neighborhood. They are 
very easily spoiled, and are quick to learn whether 
they can impose upon those around them. You can 
all realize, therefore, the great necessity of proper 
training, and the earlier that training is instituted 
the better for all concerned, including the baby. 
You laugh when I say including the baby, but I 
state a fact, for it will save baby many a slap or 
spanking when somebody's temper is lost because 
the untrained baby is raising trouble. 

You might think it a hard task to train a baby 
to any definite programme in life, but if such is 

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160 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

your idea, you are entirely in error. Nothing is 
easier, if undertaken in the right way. Once having 
made up your mind to the fact that a well-trained 
baby is far better than one which is otherwise, do 
not let neighborly baby experts, or supposed ones, 
turn you from what you have set out to do. The 
rules are alike for the babies of the rich and poor, 
the only difference being that, carried out in the 
babies of the rich their health and the nurses* well- 
being and comfort are promoted, whereas with the 
poor the mother of the baby gets the benefit as well 
as baby. And here is a strange feature of it all ; the 
mother who has no hired help to assist her in her 
daily household work, and who, therefore, most 
needs a definite plan of management for her baby, 
is the very one who fails to profit by the advantage 
of having a systematic daily programme for the 
baby. She objects, because she thinks it would be 
too hard to carry out, as if a slipshod or hit-and- 
miss way of doing things were not much harder, 
both mentally and physically. 

First, let us discuss baby's feeding and sleeping, 
as they usually go hand in hand. Baby needs food 
more or less often, the exact interval varying with 
its age and development — ^and the latter part of this 
statement is of great importance. The younger the 
baby and the less its development, the more often 
should it be fed, but these intervals should be grad- 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 161 

ually lengthened, as the baby grows older and is 
better developed until we finally come down to the 
customary three meals a day. These intervals be- 
tween, and the number of feedings a day, are the 
same for both breast-fed and bottle-fed babies. The 
amount of food required by a baby, both as to quan- 
tity and strength, is decided, not by the baby's actual 
age, but by the degree of its development. It is 
better slightly to underfeed a baby than to over- 
feed it. 

The usual interval between feedings for a new- 
bom baby, and up to the sixth or eighth week of life, 
is two hours during the day, and four hours during 
the night; in other words, only one feeding between 
ten o'clock at night and six o'clock in the morning. 
You can readily see the comfort which such a rule 
or programme affords for all concerned; it means 
practically an unbroken night's rest for both mother 
and baby. Is it worth while? Just ask some one 
who has tried both methods, the wrong one first, 
and then the right one. The emphasis they will put 
into their " Yes " will remove all doubt. 

But, you ask, how can we tell the baby that we 
want it to do things in this way? To talk to it and 
to make it understand are, of course, impossible. 
But we have an easier way. We train the baby to 
this routine by the very simple method of deciding 
at what hours it shall be fed, hours which must be 
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162 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

the same every day, and then offering it food at these 
times only, waking the baby up for its feedings 
should it be sleeping. Soon you will observe that 
baby is more reliable than the clock, and is awake 
right on the minute for its food. Of course, while 
baby is being trained to this programme, a few 
" squally '' days may be encountered, but if started 
at birth there is no difficulty. 

Now, our powers of observation have taught us 
that babies have long and short periods of sleeping, 
and thus we can arrange for the long sleeps at night. 
The frequency of the day feedings prevents baby 
from getting prolonged sleep during the day, so, by 
being undisturbed at night, he gets two long periods 
of sleep. My instructions to my patients are, always 
let the baby sleep as long as he will after the last 
(or ten o'clock) feeding, and in a very short time 
most babies sleep the entire night through without 
any " midnight supper.'' When a mother does all 
of her housework alone, it is a great help to know 
just what hours she can count upon as being her 
own, and then she can plan her duties accordingly. 
She knows when she will have to attend to her baby, 
and when he will be sleeping. 

As a baby grows older it sleeps less, but we must 
not let its daytime naps be so long as to interfere 
with its sound sleep at night. The feeding schedule 
should always be arranged so that the first feeding of 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 163 

the day will be between six and seven o'clock in the 
morning, and the last feeding at night somewhere 
between ten and eleven o'clock. 

The usual feeding intervals, according to age and 
development, are two hours from birth to the eighth 
week ; two and a half hours from the eighth to the 
twelfth week; three hours, usually, from the third 
to the sixth or seventh month ; three and a half hours 
from the seventh until the ninth or tenth month ; and 
four hours until about a year or fifteen months old. 
After this age I usually put the baby on three meals 
a day, with the heaviest meal, of course, in the middle 
of the day. 

In using the above schedules, always remember 
that a child is fed by its age and development, and 
not by its age in days or months alone. If a baby 
seems to want it, I allow one so-called midnight 
feeding until the child is six months old. If the child 
does not awaken, it shows the extra feeding is not 
needed, so I order that it be stopped. The ten 
o'clock, or late evening, feeding I permit for a few 
months longer but do not urge it upon the child, and 
stop it immediately if the baby shows no wish for it. 
You need not be afraid to awaken a sleeping baby 
at its feeding times, popular opinion to the contrary, 
notwithstanding. Soon it will get into the habit of 
awaking at these hours. I mention this fact because 
of an old superstition that it is wrong to awaken a 



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164 SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 

sleeping baby, that it should always be permitted to 
wake up naturally. If this were a fact, we should 
have to change materially the customs of our cities. 
It is perfectly true, however, that it is better to 
awaken the sleeping infant without shock or excite- 
ment, but that is easily accomplished. 

Until a baby is about nine months of age the only 
proper food for it, whether breast-fed or artificially- 
fed, is milk. Remember this, and heed it when you 
are mothers. Preach it to every mother you know, 
Stomach disorders come from improper food, and 
under this heading come spoiled food and other 
things which are not food, but rather poison, so far 
as babies go. I refer to candy, melons, soda water, 
etc. Oh, yes! Some people are silly enough to 
attempt to give these things to infants. 

There is no food so good or so safe for the young 
infant as that which Mother Nature puts into the 
mother's breasts. Good mother's milk is the food 
" par excellence " for the baby. It contains every- 
thing the infant needs for its development, mental 
and physical, and breast-fed infants are likely to 
excel the bottle-fed. It behooves every mother, 
therefore, to nurse her offspring if possible, and if 
she finds she can do so, to thank God for the bless- 
ing. It saves her from much worry, and promotes 
the baby's health and happiness. 

But even breast milk may injure a baby if the 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 165 

mother does not take proper care of herself and keep 
her milk fit for the baby's digestion. Too rich a 
milk will give the baby colic, diarrhoea, and vomiting. 
Too poor a milk will keep him from thriving, even 
though the quantity be large. In fact, if it is not soon 
ascertained that the milk is too poor in quality, the 
baby will suffer from it, this even leading to maras- 
mus or starvation. It is easy, however, to keep 
breast milk in proper condition. The mother should 
lead a quiet, even, and tranquil life, free from excite- 
ment or grief, her mind filled with thoughts of love 
and happiness. 

The nursing mother must avoid constipation, and 
must take plenty of fresh air and exercise. Over- 
indulgence in the marriage relation is harmful. She 
should eat plenty of good, plain food, but ordinarily 
there is absolutely no necessity for overfeeding. Tea 
and coffee are not recommended, but a little of each 
can be taken if there is a great desire for it. Milk 
is good for the mother, also plenty of good drinking 
water. Oranges and cooked fruits are whole- 
some. Highly seasoned or rich food is injurious, as 
is food containing vinegar or other sour material. 

Overfatiguing or sudden shock will affect breast 
milk, also the expectation of again becoming a 
mother ; for, although it is believed by many that a 
nursing mother cannot become pregnant, facts dis- 
prove the truth of this statement. Occasionally the 



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166 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

menstrual period will affect the breast milk. Water 
should rarely be given to breast-fed babies between 
meals except during the hot weather, when some cool 
boiled water may be offered between the feedings. 

Now as to the baby whose mother cannot feed 
it naturally, and which must, as a result, be bottle- 
fed. Such infants do well and thrive also if they 
get milk which is suited to their digestion. Next to 
mother's milk, cow's milk is the most universally 
used for baby feeding. It is different from mother's 
milk, and therefore must be diluted to make it as 
nearly like breast milk as possible. This dilution 
should be changed at regular intervals according to 
the age-development and requirements of the baby, 
instructions for its use being obtained from the 
family physician. 

It is not safe for the mother to try to regulate 
this matter herself, because each and every baby 
needs to be studied and fed accordingly. You have 
all seen attractive advertisements of various so-called 
infants' foods. I advise you not even to waste your 
time reading these, but to pass on. Either for the 
normal baby or the abnormal feeding case, most of 
these foods are of little if any use. Sometimes, if 
the baby is constipated, one may use a little malted 
food for a while under the orders of the doctor ; but 
even here a short course of treatment with a reliable 
milk of magnesia preparation will often suffice. 



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SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 167 

Bear in mind that fat babies are not necessarily 
healthy ones, nor lean babies unhealthy. The doctor 
will judge whether the baby is getting the right kind 
of food, be it breast- or a bottle-fed infant, by noting 
if the baby increases in weight a certain number of 
oimces a week; by the general aspect of the baby, 
whether it is happy and comfortable as a baby ought 
to be, or peevish and restless as a baby ought not 
to be ; by the character of the urine as judged by the 
odor of the diaper and the condition of the skin 
around the urinary opening ; and by the baby's bowel 
movements. 

These latter give much information to him 
who can read them, for it is true that in in- 
fant feeding every movement has a meaning of its 
own. I will say just a few words regarding the 
stools. In a breast-fed baby who is digesting its 
food well the normal stool will be smooth, and about 
the color and consistency of not too loosely 
scrambled eggs. The movements of a bottle-fed 
baby will not be quite so yellow, but they also should 
be free from curds or other particles of food. Green 
stools are never normal unless caused by certain 
kinds of medicine. Loose stools are abnormal un- 
less a laxative has been given, and stools which are 
hard and solid in consistency, and very dry, are 
abnormal also. Blood or mucus in the stools is never 
normal. Constipation is, of course, not natural, 



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168 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

but mcwe than two movements a day must be re- 
garded with suspicion. 

It may surprise you to learn that even young in- 
fants can be taught regularity in bowel movements 
if the mother is patient. It is to her interest to be 
so, for it will save much washing of diapers. The 
key-note is observation. If the mother will notice the 
time when her baby usually soils the diaper, and will 
seat the child on a commode a little while before, 
and show it how to strain a little to have a bowel 
movement, she will be surprised to see how quickly 
the baby will learn this first lesson in establishing a 
daily habit of the bowels, and abide by it It is the 
same in regard to the wetting of diapers, which can 
practically be done away with. The length of time it 
will take the baby to learn this will depend upon its 
intelligence and the patience of the mother. Control 
of the bowels will be mastered first, as it takes a little 
longer to teach the child to hold the urine and to ask 
for the commode, owing to the greater number of 
times the urine is passed. 

Babies usually receive two baths a day, one in 
the morning and one just before the evening feed- 
ing. They certainly should have at least one bath a 
day unless sickness prevents. Cleanliness is most 
necessary in the life of a baby and for this reason 
diapers should be changed immediately on being wet 
or soiled. This adds much to baby^s comfort. A 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 169 

baby's clothes are usually changed daily. The baby's 
bath should never be a hot one, nor should the baby 
be kept in it too long. It should be given in a warm 
room, and the baby wrapped up in a big bath towel 
immediately upon being taken from the water. 
Never rub a young baby dry — ^pat it dry. 

Babies should be weighed at least twice a week, 
but never immediately after a feeding, because there 
is an increase in weight at this time. This is one way 
to estimate how much milk a baby who is breast- 
fed gets at a nursing; weigh him before and after. 
The difference in weight is the amount of milk the 
baby took at the nursing. 

During the first few weeks of life the main busi- 
ness of the baby is eating and sleeping, and the less 
handling and other attention it receives the better. 
Subsequently there will be times when the baby is 
neither eating nor sleeping, and it may then with 
advantage be carried about a little; but never pick 
it up when it is crying to be taken up or to hush its 
crying, for just as soon as a baby learns that it can 
have what it wants by crying for it you have a 
spoiled child on your hands. Baby must be willing 
to lie quiet when you want him to or later to sit in 
a chair, to amuse himself, and to be happy if you 
walk about with him when you can. 

Coming back to the question of food, I will say 
that when the baby attains the dignity of seven or 



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170 SEX TALKS TO GIKLS 

eight months of age, fresh orange juice can be given 
him about an hour and a half after the first morning 
feeding; of course the juice must be sweet. The 
amount should at first be about two teaspoonfuls 
and this can be gradually increased. At about eight 
to nine months of age, a baby is usually given beef 
juice, not beef tea, and strained oat-meal, at first 
in small quantities, to be gradually increased, and 
given on alternate days immediately before the mid- 
day feeding. Do not increase too quickly. It is not 
the quantity that you give a baby that counts, but 
what it digests. 

From about the sixth to the eighth month, baby 
usually cuts some teeth, and the two lower middle 
incisors make their bow to the world in the baby's 
mouth. Now the fact that the baby has a few teeth 
does not mean that it is ready to join the family at 
table and to eat everything and anything that the 
others do. Far from it ! The feedings must be just 
as carefully regulated as before. I am never in a 
hurry to give a baby solid food. " Make haste 
slowly" is a good rule in infant feeding. Soon 
after the baby becomes accustomed to beef juice, I 
permit mutton broth and chicken broth. At present I 
shall limit my talks to the first year of the baby's life. 

Food for the baby must always be of the freshest 
and best. When in doubt as to whether it is good or 
bad, throw it away or, at any rate, do not give it 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 171 

to the baby; this is the safest plan. Test the con- 
tents of the bottle, and later of the cup, before every 
feeding. Be sure that the food is good by actually 
tasting it. Do not, however, put the nipple of the 
bottle to your own mouth, nor the bottle, nor the cup 
itself, but pour a little into a spoon and taste this. 
Your mouth may be clean, but the chances are that 
it is not so from a medical standpoint, and, besides, 
you would not like to use the unwashed fork of 
another. Do you see the point? 

The bottles in which the baby's milk is kept must 
be washed clean every day, and then boiled for 
fifteen minutes after the water has come to a 
boil. The nipples for the bottles, after a pre- 
liminary boiling, must be kept in boric acid solu- 
tion when not in use. When the mother nurses 
her baby, her nipples should be gently bathed 
with boric acid solution before each feeding, and the 
baby's mouth also washed out very gently with a 
swab soaked in boric acid solution; this should not 
be so wet as to drip liquid into the baby's throat In 
summer, particularly, must great care be given to the 
baby's food and its containers. If flies get on food 
for babies or anybody else, it is dangerous to health. 
The best time to be careful is every day, whether it 
be spring, summer, autumn or winter. 

Bottle-fed babies should have fresh boiled water 
which has been cooled, or stone-filtered water, sev- 



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17« SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

eral times a day between feedings. Fresh air is good 
for babies as well as for grown-up folks, by night as 
well as by day, and they should have plenty of it; 
but I see no sense in exposing them to extreme 
weather of any kind with the idea of toughening 
them, for they sometimes may succumb to, and die 
during, the hardening process. 

Be moderate. Do not overdress nor underdress 
babies. Keep them warm and comfortable, and pro- 
tect the extremities, but do not muffle up their 
throats. Do not take them here, there, and every- 
where; you may enjoy it, but the baby will not 
thrive on it. Do not continually jolt the child or toss 
it about ; the baby is not a toy, nor yet a medicine bot- 
tle with a " shake well " label on it. Excitement and 
shodcs are bad for the developing nervous system of 
the child. Never scream at a child in great anger, 
nor scold it for trivial, or even great things. There 
is no sense in wredcing a child's nervous system in 
order to coirect it. 

So far as possible keep your babies out of crowds 
and badly ventilated places, such as stores, factories, 
etc. Strange as it n^ay seem, babies do not enjoy 
moving picture shows and like entertainments, and 
a carriage ride in the fresh air is far more beneficial 
to the health and gives them an appetite. 

Babies thrive on love and the right kind of at- 
tention, but may pine and fade away without it. 



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SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 173 

They were made to be loved, hugged, and kissed in 
a nice, quiet way, without getting them unduly ex- 
cited, but should never be kissed on the mouth. Babies 
were not given to their mothers to be turned over to 
the care of nurse-maids of more or less experience 
so that the mothers can attend to their so-called 
social duties — such a misuse of the word duty, by 
the way — or suffragette campaigns. The real wife 
and mother can exert a greater political influence 
than our would-be female voters. 

I cannot understand how a mother can be willing 
to entrust to a perfect stranger the " mother-duty " 
of her child, a duty that should be to her both a 
pleasure and joy. I cannot understand how she can 
be willing that a strange woman should receive most 
of the baby love and caresses of the little human 
flower with which God has blessed her husband and 
herself. I cannot see how she can be willing that 
this part of herself should be reared, practically, by 
a stranger ; but, then, I suppose I am hopelessly old- 
fashioned, and it was my good fortune to marry a 
wife who is also old-fashioned in this regard. My 
babies have had the mother-love that was their right, 
and were not cheated out of it by " social and politi- 
cal" engagements. 

It IS noble to be a club-woman working for some 
good purpose, but the proper care of her own chil- 
dren should be a purpose high enough for any 



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174 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

woman. It is not, of course, a work which will make 
your name appear in the newspapers in double- 
leaded type, or your pictiu-e (for a price) in the 
periodicals, but it is of real importance to your hus- 
band, your children, our nation, and the world at 
large. After the children have received daily atten- 
tion and are properly trained, any spare time the 
mother has can be devoted to her own pursuits. 

If each and every mother would give her sons 
and daughters proper home training many of the 
evils that the women's clubs are seeking to redress 
would cease to exist, because of the highmindedness 
of their sons and daughters, and the generally im- 
proved character of the coming generation. Re- 
form, like charity, should begin at home. Let the 
mothers learn where their sons spend their even- 
ings and other spare hours, who are their men and 
women companions, and how the time is spent. Let 
them exercise the same careful supervision over their 
daughters. The lot of the working girl can be made 
better by better pay with shorter working hours, by 
decent places to work in and better people to work 
for, just as well as by working girls' clubs, supported 
as a hobby, by women whose husbands may be bad 
employers in more ways than one, so far as consid- 
eration for their employees goes. 

Do not misunderstand me. I am not condemning 
worthy and commendable social work, but merely 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 175 

cx)nimenting on some phases of the situation. Can- 
not the wives of these men do better reform work 
in their homes by endeavoring to elevate their own 
husbands' standards concerning humanity, and also 
by cultivating in their own children higher ideals in 
this respect? 

The same applies to the poor mother so far as 
making her home a centre goes. Instead of being 
a neighborhood gossip, with her home the meeting 
place for the neighborhood scandal-mongers, let her 
efforts be to help her husband, and to stimulate him 
to rise from baser surroundings and thoughts to 
higher levels. Let her make her home attractive 
to him and to his friends. Let her efforts be to make 
her growing children real men and women, instead 
of mere people, as so many are. In her efforts to 
aid and elevate her husband and their children, she 
cannot but elevate herself. 

Mothers should dress their little children in such 
a way that there can be no accidental exposure of 
their persons while at play in their homes or on the 
street, and the child can be taught very early to be 
modest in behavior, and to allow no one but its 
mother ever to touch the private parts of its body. 

Sometimes, a little girl who is unconscious of 
wrong in exposing her person, may also be unaware 
that it is wrong to allow her sexual parts to be han- 
dled by men or boys or other girls or women. This 



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176 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

is important, not merely because of the handling, but 
because among a certain foreign part of our popula- 
tion there is a dangerous superstition that if a male 
suffering from gonorrhoea tampers with a virgin his 
gonorrhoea will be cured, and the virgin most easily 
secured for such a purpose is the unsuspecting little 
girl. 

Guard the little ones in early life, and try to 
strengthen them morally by training them to modest 
behavior. Do not think that I exaggerate when I 
speak of this tampering with little girls. If you ask 
any physician about gonorrhoea in little girls you will 
be surprised to learn how much of it there is. 

REVIEW 

I. When should the management of a child begin, and why? 
II. What are the usual intervals b^ween feedings for a 
new-born baby ? 

III. How can the hours for sleep be arranged? 

IV. As the baby grows older how must the feeding and 

sleeping schedules be changed? 

V. Upon what do these changes depend? 

VI. WTiat is the only proper food for the infant? What 
should be avoided? 

VII. Under what conditions might breast milk be injurious 

for the baby? Explain fully. 

VIII. By what does the doctor judge as to whether the child 

is getting proper food? 

IX. Discuss the importance of cleanliness in all that pertains 
to the care of the baby. 

X. Discuss the importance of early training in modest be- 
havior. 



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Continuing our talk in the last chapter, we shall 
again discuss the infant. Baby's sleeping quarters 
should be the best in the house, the room moderately 
c(X)l and well aired both night and day. Baby should 
always sleep alone — ^never under any circumstances 
in the same bed with the mother or father. Baby, 
like yourself, should never occupy a bed which has 
been used by another without an entire change of 
linen. Venereal and other diseases can be con- 
tracted from soiled bedding. 

The fewer the people who kiss or handle the baby 
the better, and I have already told you that it should 
never be kissed on the mouth. Infants are best se- 
cluded from too close association with other chil- 
dren, because they are apt to " catch '* catarrhal and 
other infectious diseases from them. 

Such things as pacifiers, mouth rings, and other 
instruments for baby to suck are uncomfortable, in- 
jurious to the health, and must positively not be al- 
lowed. I know that advertisements of these various 
devices, made principally for the financial benefit of 
the manufacturer, set forth in glowing terms all that 
they will do for the baby, most of which they do not 
do, but here are a few things for which I give them 
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178 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

unlimited credit: They help the development of ade- 
noids, upset the digestion, and are great carriers of 
germs to the baby's mouth. 

I have already advised you not to use infant 
foods, and I want to urge you, still more emphat- 
ically, never to give so-called "soothing syrups," 
for after a dose of one of these poisonous concoc- 
tions or mixtures there is always the chance that the 
little one may sleep on forever in that deep eternal 
sleep that knows no awakening in this world. They 
are wo fully misnamed ; they should be called " baby- 
killers." Babies do not need soothing syrups, be- 
cause, if they are not spoiled, they do not fret or cry 
hard imless something is wrong with them, and 
this should be corrected instead of giving " poison " 
to the baby. Spoiled babies, too, do not need 
poisonous drugs to quiet them, but proper training 
to correct their peevishness. No soothing S3nrups 
are harmless ; for unless they contain certain drugs, 
they cannot stupefy the baby into quietness. 

Do not give the little one tea, coffee, soda water, 
seltzer, vichy, beer, ale, porter, or liquor of any kind 
with the idea that you are strengthening the child; 
for you are not only doing the reverse, but are actu- 
ally harming it. Milk is the best and proper food 
for any baby first, last, and all the time. 

Do not try to force the baby's development for 
the sake of having him outdo the neighbor's baby. 



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SEX TALKS TO GIBlS 179 

Observations extending over many years have shown 
that at certain ages babies do certain things or de- 
velop certain abiHties, and if any baby advances 
along these lines the parents need not worry. Even 
if the baby fails to develop normally do not worry, 
but consult your family physician, and he will rectify 
the defect if it be one that comes within the powers 
of medicine. 

Do not, under any circumstances, try to be your 
own doctor, and experiment on the baby with home- 
made remedies or the so-called patent medicines to 
be found in such profusion at the corner drug store. 
If it were so easy to treat sick babies, doctors would 
not have to make a life study of their profession in 
order to keep abreast of the medical world. You 
know that good doctors are continual students of 
medicine, for to stop studying is to be unworthy of 
the trust reposed in them by their patients. More- 
over, if it were easy for untrained persons and 
patent medicine manufacturers to understand and 
treat the baby's ailments, the death-rate among 
babies would not be so disgracefully high as it now 
is. Rest assured that, when the child of the corner 
druggist or of the patent medicine manufacturer is 
ill, the doctor is consulted. Such men want skilled 
advice, and not home-made or ready-made cure-alls. 

It is a matter of regret that some doctors know 
so little about babies, for babies and children are the 



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180 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

most intelligent and interesting patients a doctor can 
have; at least I think so, and my work in the chil- 
dren's clinics has always been a source of great pleas- 
ure to me. To those who study them even the vari- 
ous cries of the baby are significant, some indicating 
pain, some himger, some temper, etc. 

Remember that cutting teeth is a normal func- 
tion, and rarely disturbs a baby much ; so, if the baby 
is not well at about the time he is getting teeth, do 
not just say " teeth," and let it go at that. There is 
usually something wrong which should have prompt 
attention. And, speaking of teeth, I want to say 
here that it is very essential for the first teeth of 
children to be taken care of. The use of a tooth- 
brush and powder must be taught to a child as early 
as possible. It is never too early to start ; but imtil 
the child is old enough to clean his teeth, it is the 
duty of the mother to do it for him. 

Do not let the baby be constipated. Serious re- 
sults may follow constipation, not the least serious 
of which are convulsions. The use of the rectal 
syringe, or of glycerine suppositories daily, is in- 
jurious. The bowels are best regulated by proper 
food, and until the daily habit is firmly established, 
the use of a good preparation of milk of magnesia in 
suitable doses is allowable, but it should be stopped 
as soon as possible. Castor oil is good for a gen- 
eral cleaning out, in both adults and babies, but used 



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SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 181 

habitually it causes constipation. Small doses of 
calomel can also be used in children for a general 
cleansing of the bowels. 

In the summer time, care must be taken not to 
overclothe the baby, nor to expose the child unneces- 
sarily to the direct rays of the sim or to extreme heat. 
Remember that frequent cool sponging is very ac- 
ceptable even to small infants when the thermom- 
eter is approaching the boiling point. If the baby, 
at its regular feeding times, shows an inclination to 
leave some of its food, do not urge it upon the child. 
You know that when it is hot you do not always 
feel like eating your usual meals. Give the baby 
plenty of cool boiled water to drink, however, be- 
tween the feeding hours. Keep him out in the fresh 
air as much as you can, both in winter and summer, 
but whereas during the winter you seek sunny spots 
protected from the wind, in the summer you seek 
shade and cooling breezes for the baby. 

Have I already told you to be particularly care- 
ful about baby's food in the summer? Well, this 
truth will bear much repeating, so I will tell you it 
again. Before any food, whether liquid or solid, 
be given to an infant or young child, let it be thor- 
oughly examined and tasted to ascertain that it is 
perfectly good. It is so easy to prevent diarrhceal 
disease in babies and young children in the summer, 
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18« SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

while to take all preventive measures. Remember 
" an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure." 

Many a household, whose sunshine vanished 
when the baby died, would still have been happy had 
some simple precautions been taken instead of leav- 
ing things to chance. Unfortunately, even doctors 
must sometimes fail in their efforts. Vain regrets 
and broken hearts do not bring back the little ones 
who have passed into the " Great Beyond." When 
you attain the dignity and honor of motherhood, pro- 
tect your baby. In case of diarrhoea or indigestion 
stop all food at once, administer either castor oil or 
calomel, preferably the former, and send for the 
doctor. One visit early may save many visits later. 

When babies begin to crawl, they should not be 
allowed to indulge in this healthful pleasure on the 
bare floor or even a covered one. A large mat, pref- 
erably of washable material, should be put on the 
floor, and their activities in the crawling line should 
be limited to this specially covered place. The rea- 
sons for this are very simple. All floors, covered 
and uncovered, are dirty and full of germs. They 
could not be otherwise, even in the cleanest of homes, 
since every one walks over them, no matter where 
they have been. Some of this dirt and its germ con- 
tents will ultimately find their way into the baby's 
mouth if it crawls oVer the floor. You can readily 
see, therefore, how liable the baby is to get some 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 183 

disease if it is allowed to crawl around indiscrimi- 
nately. Moreover, with its own special mat to crawl 
on, there is no danger of baby finding some stray 
article, such as a pin or a nail, to put into its mouth 
and swallow before the mother can see what it is 
doing. 

As regards the putting of things into the mouth, 
including its own thumbs and fingers, this habit can 
be checked in children quite early by constant effort 
on the part of the mother or the one who has the 
baby in charge. Teach the baby that all things, in- 
cluding its own fingers, were not meant for the 
mouth, by removing the fingers promptly if they are 
found there, and by stopping anything else from get- 
ting there if you see it on the way. Constant, patient 
repetition finally convinces baby that this is wrong, 
and the habit is checked. It is much easier to break 
up the baby's habit of putting other things than its 
own fingers in its mouth. As the consequences of 
this habit are sometimes serious, it is well to break 
it up as soon as is possible. 

Another habit of babies which must be stopped 
promptly is the one which most of them have of 
putting their hands in and about the genital organs, 
especially when they are having their diapers 
changed, or are exposed for any other reason. Re- 
moval of the hands at once, time and time again, 
teaches even the youngest infant to stop this practice. 



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184 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

Sometimes, as you remove the hands from these 
parts or stop them on their way there, you can say, 
" No ! No ! '* and that will perhaps help the little one 
to understand sooner what you mean. It is much 
easier to stop this practice in infancy than later in 
life, and the continuance of this unconscious habit of 
infant masturbation tends to favor the subsequent 
formation of the habit of real masturbation in either 
sex. While speaking of the changing of young 
children, or of other occasions when their sexual 
parts are exposed, I wish to say that I think it a 
grave error to permit other children to be around at 
these times. 

Keep a young baby neat and clean both as to body 
and clothes. It need not be dressed in the finest of 
materials, but you can teach it from the very begin- 
ning that " Cleanliness is next to godliness," and to 
take a pride in its personal appearance, so far as neat- 
ness goes. 

The time to wean a breast baby is from the ninth 
to the tenth month, by which time the baby should 
have discontinued breast feedings entirely. During 
the nursing period it seems almost unnecessary to 
say that, at each feeding, the baby uses one breast 
only, alternating from one to the other. The wean- 
ing of a breast-fed baby is a very simple affair, if 
the baby has been having a single bottle feeding 
every day from birth, as every breast-fed baby 



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SEX TALKS TO GIKLS 185 

should. This plan has the advantage of making 
weaning easy when the time arrives, and it also 
enables the mother to transfer the baby to part or all 
bottle feedings at any time, should occasion arise. 
If a breast-fed baby ever misses a feeding from a 
breast, this breast should be carefully watched to 
see if it need be emptied artificially in order to avoid 
" cake " breast which might go on to abscess, and 
breast abscesses are extremely painful. 

To a baby who has never been bottle-fed at all, 
the weaning process may be troublesome. You can- 
not g^ve to this baby the same food that a baby 
brought up entirely or partly on the bottle will take 
and digest properly, at the same age and develop- 
ment. You must start with milk much more diluted, 
and work up as fast as the baby's digestion will per- 
mit ; for, if you increase the strength too fast, or do 
too much, you will give the baby indigestion. Baby 
will not like the rubber nipple at first, but there must 
be no compromise, even if the baby absolutely re- 
fuses a feeding or two. If a feeding is refused, how- 
ever, baby must not, under any circumstances, be 
fed before the usual hour of the next feeding. By 
this time, and with a good appetite, he may not care 
whence or how the food is coming, so long as it 
comes to satisfy the awful emptiness inside. 

Soon after weaning, I let the babies who are 
under my care, drink from a perfectly clean glass 



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186 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

or cup, so that, as a rule, soon after and often before 
its first birthday baby has no further use for the 
bottle. This change from bottle to cup is not at all 
to the liking of the baby, but the same firmness that 
convinces it you are determined to have your way 
wins in the end. 

The question of giving the baby solid food is an 
import;^t one, and depends more upon development 
than actual age. Food that requires more or less 
chewing demands also teeth to chew with. It would 
be foolish, therefore, to give a baby this kind of food 
before it has the necessary teeth to chew it. Yet 
many attempts are made, with disastrous results, to 
feed babies according to age alone, and without 
regard to development. It cannot be done success- 
fully; indigestion or worse conditions are bound to 
result. Between six and eighteen months of age, a 
child usually cuts twelve teeth, six of which appear 
during the first year. We are talking now of the 
average child, for some will be quicker, and some 
slower, in the matter of dentition. After the addi- 
tion of beef juice, mutton broth, and strained cereals 
— the cereals must be cooked for three hours — ^to the 
baby's diet, we let it rest so far as new things to eat 
are concerned. 

At about the twelfth month, if the child has 
several teeth, I permit zweiback once or twice a 
day. A little later, a soft-boiled egg is added to the 



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SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 187 

mid-day feeding to take the place of either the mut- 
ton broth or the beef juice. It is best, however, not 
to give eggs oftener than every other day. All this 
time the orange juice is given daily, as before. 

At about sixteen to eighteen months of age, pro- 
vided most of the teeth are cut, I introduce baby to 
rare scraped beef or mutton-chop, to such vegetables 
as spinach and green peas, the latter of which are 
mashed and strained to get rid of the skins, boiled 
young onions, and asparagus tips. I also allow 
stewed prunes which have been pressed through a 
strainer, and a little later baked apples. 

No one, whether child or adult, should ever eat 
fried food if he has any respect for his digestion, and 
food cooked in this manner should never be given to 
young children. 

Baby's heaviest meal should be at mid-day, and 
the meal just before retiring for the night should be 
light. Food between meals should never be per- 
mitted, and by ** food " I mean all eatables, includ- 
ing sweets; the only exception is the orange juice 
already spoken of. 

Before two years of age, no cakes, candies, or 
desserts of any kind should be given the child. When 
this age is reached, however, I think a piece of good 
chocolate, as a dessert after the mid-day meal, is 
certainly allowable. Not even in summer time is 
iCe cream soda permissible for babies or children, 



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188 SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 

and even grown-ups who have reached old age are 
better off without it. Under no circumstances should 
a child be given liquor in any form except during an 
illness and then only by order of the doctor. 

The example you set the growing child is what 
the child is going to copy; so in word and action 
within and without the home, see that the example 
you set is always fit to be copied. Do not expect 
the child to be better than the pattern set before him. 
Do not delude yourselves with the idea that small 
children do not see, hear, notice, or remember; be- 
cause, if you do, you are building upon false hopes, 
and your awakening is liable to be most rude and 
unpleasant. 

As a rule, I do not believe in corporal punishment 
for children. Solomon's alleged saying, " Spare the 
rod and spoil the child," is applicable in very few 
cases, it seems to me. There may be exceptions, of 
course, but these should be looked into most care- 
fully to see in how far the parents are to blame. 
Most children are punished, not so much because 
they have been naughty and need correction, as be- 
cause the punishing parent has lost his or her tem- 
per. A spanking is given, therefore, not for its 
corrective effect, as is asserted, but merely to let the 
parent " work off " this anger. Do not try to control 
your children through fear, but through love and 



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S^ TALKS TO GntLS 189 

care. Be firm and just. Even children can appre- 
ciate these qualities. 

I have given you these simple, plain, non-scien- 
tific talks about yourselves and about babies so that 
you can act as missionaries in the latter field and 
spread a knowledge of the care of babies, as well as 
sex knowledge, and thereby do your little part to- 
ward reducing the mortality of young infants 
through the ignorance of present-day mothers. I 
hope that some day you will all be mothers, and when 
you attain that blessed state you must remember 
these two last talks, and put into practice with your 
children the advice I have given you. Your hus- 
bands, your children, and you yourselves will be 
better and happier if you do. 

I want you to be missionaries also as regards 
what I have told you about sex and sexual hygiene. 
I hope you have read these through, and most care- 
fully weighed in your minds the facts offered for 
your assimilation. It is my hope that they may 
prove profitable to you, and that after reading you 
will feel convinced that a pure life is the only one 
for you and yours. I have stated only plain facts to 
you, without entering into the religious aspect of the 
question. Each of you has a conscience to guide 
you as to right or wrong, so it seemed to me not my 
place to add religious views to my purely medical 
talks. I ask you, however, to go forth as advocates 



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190 SEX TALKS TO GIBLS 

of social purity in both sexes, and to preadi it both 
by word and deed throughout your whole lives. 
Join this movement to improve and better our race 
and the world we live in, and help to promote the 
well-being, health, and happiness of all. Social 
purity is a step in the right direction. 
I A word to the girl who goes out to her daily 
work, and, in fact, even to the girl who attends 
school or college. Do not go attired as if for a 
ball or party. Dress neatly and plainly, as if you 
really meant to do something, and do not look as 
though you had come to pose or to show off your 
clothes. Either study or work is easier in work-a- 
day clothes, and these enable you to accomplish 
more. At the same time, those around will not think 
you dressed up for a discreditable purpose. 

In closing my talks, I feel that they will not be 
complete unless I add to them a few words about 
that period of a woman's life that many of you have 
heard called " the change of life,'* and which is so 
dreaded by many of your sex. The advice I give 
you now will not be of use to you, personally, for 
some years to come; but repeated by you, perhaps, 
!to older women, might convey to them valuable in- 
formation, which would be instrumental in saving 
their lives. 

The change of life is that time when the men- 
strual periods cease, and the woman's sexual sys- 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 191 

tern undergoes certain changes concerning which we 
need not here go into detail. The age at which 
these phenomena occur is usually between forty and 
forty-five years — in some women later, in a few 
earlier. 

It is a popular belief that, at this time, cancer 
of the womb is liable to occur and that a woman may 
lose her reason. Needless to say that both of these 
beliefs are practically unfotmded, the main ground 
for the former being the fact that, owing to certain 
symptoms which arise at this time, a woman may go 
to her physician, and upon examination he may find 
a cancerous growth. Immediately the report will be 
spread that it came with change of life. As this 
period approaches a woman will notice certain things 
which are signs of what is coming. Before enum- 
erating them, I want to say that every woman should 
visit her doctor at this time, and undergo a most 
thorough examination, of the sexual parts partic- 
ularly. 

The appearance of a lump in either of the breasts, 
no matter at what age, should mean an immediate 
visit to the doctor. It makes no difference whether 
the limip be painful or not; often the least painful 
are the most serious. Do not waste time wondering 
what it is, but go to the doctor and let him find out. 
Prompt action on your part may save your life. Any 
disturbance of the usual menstrual period, whether 



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192 SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 

it be in the amount of blood lost, or the number of 
the periods, should be reported to your physician. 
Any imusual pain or feeling of soreness in these 
parts should be brought at once to his attention. I 
emphasize this because many serious conditions may, 
and do, arise from neglecting seeming trifles. Many 
a grave has been filled unnecessarily early for no 
other reason but neglect in the beginning of what 
later proved a fatal condition. 

The menopause, or " change of life," is usually 
ushered in by a change in the menstruation. It be- 
comes more or less irregular in occurrence, the quan- 
tity of blood lost sometimes decreases, although in 
many cases it increases for a while before it dimin- 
ishes, then finally it stops altogether. There is a com- 
plaint of hot and cold flashes, of palpitations of the 
heart, of increased nervousness, of diminution of 
appetite or a marked increase of the same, of steady 
increase in weight, and flushing of the face. There are 
also more or less vague s3rmptoms of all kinds, refer- 
able to various parts of the body, but not definitely 
located. Any vaginal discharge of blood or of any 
other kind, after the menopause is complete, should 
immediately be reported to the family physician for 
his investigation, for here delay is dangerous. 

This ends the last talk of our series, and nothing 
remains but again to say that I hope I have served 
you well, and to express the wish that my talks will 



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SEX TALKS TO GIRLS 193 

prove profitable to you both in the present and in the 
future. They are not as perfect as they might be; 
but if you have followed them attentively, I think 
you will have derived from them some knowledge 
of yourselves, your functions, of what to look for 
and what to avoid in your sexual life ; also, how to 
take care of your offspring when you attain the 
blessed dignity of motherhood. If I have imparted 
this knowledge, I have been of real service to you ; 
therefore my efforts have not been in vain. 

REVIEW 

I. What IS necessary concerning baby's sleeping quarters 

and bed? 
II. What are the dangers of pacifiers and of soothing 
syrups ? 

III. Discuss teething and the care of baby's teeth. 

IV. State what care is necessary in clothing and feeding the 

baby, particularly in summer. 
V. Tell how to protect the baby when crawling, and what 

care is necessary while genital parts are exposed. 
VI. When and how should baby be weaned? 

VII. How should additions be made to the baby's food as it 

grows older? 

VIII. In what ways can you make these talks of value? 

IX. What signs indicate the approach of "the change of 

life"? 
X. What precautions are necessary at this time ? 



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